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Hi everybody.
It's Elizabeth here with a quick note to say that last week Gretchen and I accidentally identified Father's Day as June 15th.
It's actually June 21st, so making that correction now.
Hello and welcome to Happier, a podcast where we talk about strategies and solutions for making our lives happier healthier, more productive and more creative.
This week is episode 590.
It's a 10th episode, and every 10th episode we do a very special episode.
And this week we will explore suggestions for managing worry, because worry is a big happiness stumbling block.
I'm Gretchen Rubin, a writer who studies happiness, good habits, and human nature.
I'm in my little hot home office in New York City, and joining me today from Los Angeles is my sister, Elizabeth Kraft.
And Elizabeth, I think your office doesn't seem to get as hot as my office.
That's me, Elizabeth Kraft, a TV writer and producer living in L.A.
And yes, it does tend to stay cool.
So it's not something I worry about, but I do worry a lot.
So this is an episode for me.
Yes.
So Alyssa, this very special episode is about worry, and it was inspired because you recently had an idea for your design.
Your summer related to worry, and we just realized that worry is such a huge topic.
Yes, so this summer is part of my design, my summer, Gretchen.
I am setting aside worry for the summer.
At least I'm trying to.
For the summer.
Yes, for the whole summer.
I am attempting to not worry.
I think of it largely in this sort of existential way of like not worrying about my career, not worrying about Jack's future, not worrying about whatever.
But also I'm realizing I can really also apply it to the smaller things, like not worry if we're going to get to a party on time, not worry about if I spent too much on plane tickets.
All these little things I'm realizing it also is great to not worry about.
Yeah.
And we asked listeners for ideas.
To kind of help me keep this top of mind because, as we know, it's easy to have this great plan to do something and it's so in your head.
And then, three days later, for absolutely no reason, you forget about it and never think about it again.
And we do not want that to happen with my setting aside of worry.
Yes.
One listener had a rhyming reminder.
Love a rhyming reminder.
Leslie said, let summer glide set worry aside or enjoy the ride set worry aside.
I realized I really like the word glide.
I think that could be a good one word theme for the year.
The word glide.
That's a good word.
Applied is a great word.
Julia said, how about calling it her off-white, off-worry summer?
Because I also have a theme of wearing all off-white this summer.
So I love that.
And I've been saying that to myself, off-white, off-worry, off-white, off-worry.
And then Anne said, this worry will wait.
Very simple.
A little alliteration there.
That's good.
Love rhyming, love alliteration.
And then Sarah wrote to say that there is Hawaiian saying, no worries, no hurries.
So that's good about not worrying about getting to the party on time.
No worries, no hurries.
Just let it unfold.
Yes, and Kelly suggested a song.
She said, We also heard about Don't Worry, Be Happy.
Another song about worry.
Yeah, it's like your summer of yacht rock last summer.
This could be your summer of don't worry playlist.
And then Mindy...
Your old friend from Kansas City, my old friend from Kansas City, family friends from Kansas City had a wonderful idea to get worry beads in off-white.
Yes.
So that's off-white, off-worry.
And you love to have something like that, like a bracelet or a ring or a sweatshirt that has it.
And I think that's great.
Your worry beads are for don't worry beads.
Yes.
Yes, don't worry beads.
So I've actually been looking at Etsy, trying to find the perfect beads.
Now that I have it in my mind, I feel like I know exactly what I want.
So I am perusing for my worry beads.
So thank you, Min, for that suggestion.
Yeah.
And I can't remember if I mentioned the title of the children's book that I was talking about last time.
It's so delightful.
So if you have picture books in your life, you should know about Kevin Hanke.
He has these wonderful picture books.
And one is called Wemberly Worried.
And Wemberly's grandmother says, worry, worry, worry, said her grandmother.
Too much worry.
And it's all about, you know.
Too much worry.
So it's very apropos.
I would get it for you, Elizabeth, but I don't know.
I wish I could just show it to you.
By the way, Gretchen.
Another one I wanted to mention is I'm sorry I don't remember the name right now, but a listener said that Worrying is often known as praying to the devil.
So she just says to herself, I'm not going to pray to the devil today.
So I have never heard that before, but that's another thing to remind oneself.
Not going to pray to the devil.
Vivid and powerful.
Okay.
Yes.
Before we jump into our suggestions about how not to worry, just a few things to say.
Now one is that there are scientific ways to distinguish among different states, like anxiety stress, rumination and worry, that really describe these in different ways.
So for instance, worry is about looking forward.
If you're really gonna use it, strictly speaking, it should be imagining worst case scenarios, catastrophizing for the future, Agonizing about the uncertainty of upcoming events.
All of this sounds very familiar.
That's worry.
And then rumination is when you're looking backwards.
This is when you're endlessly replaying a conversation.
You're thinking about a mistake you made or a failure that you made, and thinking about why things went wrong, what you should have done differently.
That all sounds very familiar too, but we're just going to talk about worry to encompass all these states.
We're not going to really get into these distinctions.
Also, we are not talking as doctors or scientists and we're really talking about the range of ordinary emotion.
It is Very true.
It is absolutely the case that you can have a level of worry where you need professional help to manage it.
If you feel overwhelmed, you can't function.
If it's interfering with life or work, we're encouraging you to get help.
There.
This conversation is really about people who are experiencing an unpleasant level of worry but what you might still consider sort of the ordinary range of worry.
And the final thing to say is that, in the right amount, these negative emotions actually play a very positive role in a happy life.
When we worry, we make sure to prepare.
We double check.
We practice. plan.
We buy our plane tickets early and save ourselves money and time, but it can become overwhelming and unconstructive.
Sometimes the worry, it's not helping you.
It's not solving problems for you.
So the aim is not to eliminate all worry.
That.
So these are ways to manage that worry, to keep it in a constructive amount when you feel like okay, this amount of worry is not helping me.
Yes.
And to be clear, Gretchen, with my set worry aside for the summer, It's not that I'm putting my head in the sand.
Yes.
I'm still wanting to move forward and do constructive things.
I just don't want to excessively worry.
There's things that you worry about.
Where you're like, it doesn't change anything if I worry about this.
Right.
Okay.
So here are 20 simple, practical, manageable strategies. to manage worry.
And Elizabeth, the first one is the one we've been talking about.
Yes, which is schedule time to worry or not worry.
So I have given myself the summer off of worrying.
Now, side note Gretchen, as we discussed.
I'm hoping that in not worrying over the summer, I realize oh, I should not worry all the time.
Right.
Yeah.
You retrain yourself to your level of worry.
Yes.
But the way this works more typically because you sort of were thinking outside the box with taking the summer off from worry is often you'll say I only worry from like 330 to 4 every day.
And other times I don't worry.
I wait until it's time to worry.
And at that time I sit down and just do my worrying and maybe you have a pen and paper and you're making lists.
But this sounds counterintuitive.
But it really works because it keeps your worry in a set time and then it's not just spilling into all parts of your day.
Then number two has to do with superstition.
A superstition is the irrational belief that an object or behavior has the power to influence an outcome, when there's no logical connection between these things.
And while most of us aren't superstitious, many of us are a little stitious.
Elizabeth, I think this is a superstition that you often experience, which is the belief that by worrying about something, you will ward it off.
Yes, I definitely feel like if I don't worry about it, I'm inviting something bad to happen surrounding whatever it is.
I 100 fall prey to that.
Like it's careless not to be worried, even if the worrying isn't leading to any constructive outcome.
Well, this is like a friend of mine who said I'm the person who's keeping the airplane in the sky because I'm the one who's worried the whole time.
But you know what?
You don't need to have that worry.
That worry isn't helpful.
So just recognizing that you feel like you have a duty to worry, really question that.
And then number three is recognize when a worry isn't ripe.
So, Gretchen, this is a really interesting idea, and it relates to law.
Yes.
In law, ripeness is a doctrine determining whether a dispute has progressed far enough for a court to decide it.
So the idea is that we want to save courts from wasting valuable resources and time on disputes that are premature or speculative or abstract.
Nothing's actually happened.
Somebody's just objecting to sort of an abstract idea or something that hasn't come about yet.
So it's meant to ensure that there is an actual concrete injury that has occurred or is truly imminent.
So, for instance, as I've talked about many times, my husband Jamie had hepatitis C that was miraculously cured by science.
But for many years, it was a very big worry.
But it wasn't causing him any imminent issues, but there were many, many worrisome things right on the horizon.
But I really tried to stay focused on, well, what do we need to worry about all the time right now?
Like I'm not going to worry about.
Well, what would we do if Jamie got liver cancer, because he's more at risk of having liver cancer now?
It's just like there's no reason to worry about that now because it hasn't happened yet.
And that's sometimes easier said than done.
But I think, looking back, you know he did get out of the hepatitis C with minimal lifetime consequences.
And so I'm glad that I saved myself a lot of worry that thankfully, would have ended up being needless.
Absolutely.
It would have just caused me a lot of pain at the time that I was worrying.
Yes.
And the people around you, too.
Yeah, exactly.
The fourth thing, and this is a very practical thing that really helps, is calm your breathing.
And one thing to think about is breathing out is really good for worry, even more than breathing in.
Breathing in you can sometimes start huffing kind of like like that.
But breathing out is more calming.
But there's a lot of expert advice about breathing techniques.
So if this is the kind of thing that appeals to you, you can go really deep into breathing.
Another one is distraction.
Now, the thing about distraction, it is a double-edged sword.
And sometimes we don't want to distract ourselves from something that we really need to be focusing on.
And in that sense distraction can be very negative, because it can be something that we do to numb ourselves or to procrastinate.
But sometimes it can be very valuable to give yourself a respite from something that is very painful, where you just need to give yourself a breather, get a little bit of temporary relief.
It can help you to get your perspective back and can help you re-energize.
It can help you fall asleep if you're under a lot of strain.
I think a great audiobook, a great TV show, a great podcast. can really be a great distraction.
In my observation, if you're trying to give yourself a respite from worry, you'll probably find it more helpful if you're listening to something that's coherent and valuable, So you're not doing mindless numbing scrolling through a feed, but you're listening to an audiobook of a book that you really enjoy and that is worth your time.
Or it's a podcast that's full of interesting information, where you really feel like your time is well spent.
So you're giving yourself a break, but it's not that numbing potato chip stuff that leaves you with a bad taste in your mouth and doesn't make you feel truly refreshed.
Yes.
You're feeding yourself with something good.
Yes, exactly.
And then number six is the stewing is worse than the doing.
Remembering that.
Yes.
Here's a remind me reminder.
Yeah, this doing is worse than the doing.
We worry so much about getting something done.
Often, once you start, you stop worrying about it because you're so focused on doing whatever you're doing.
You know, like the worry is ahead of time.
And then once I remember when I had to take the bar exam, I was so worried about it.
And I was looking forward to the bar exam because I was like, once I'm taking the bar.
I'm not going to be worried at all because I'll be so focused on the test that I won't be experiencing a negative emotion anymore.
I'll feel and then it'll be over.
But yeah, so just don't get it perfect.
Get it going.
The first step, all those things.
Yeah Gretchen, I think a lot of times with medical procedures people feel this way.
You know that they worry and worry and worry about it.
And then when they go and get it done, it actually isn't all that bad.
Yeah, exactly.
Number seven is take action in the world about what you're worried about.
There is a quotation often attributed to Gandhi, though it has not been verified is be the change you want to see in the world.
But whoever said it, it's a very helpful sentiment.
If you're worried about something, if you take action to fix it or change it.
People who are involved in solutions often seem to worry less.
We often talk about how action is the antidote to anxiety.
And so being part of the solution can help you with your worry.
Yes.
All right, Gretch, coming up, we've got more about worry.
But first, this break.
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Okay, now number eight and number nine are connected.
So number eight is to make a list.
So if you have thoughts racing in your mind, putting them down on paper will often really help you.
You're like, oh my gosh, we need to move.
There's a million things I need to do.
Really just start making a list.
It makes you feel like you're more in control of it.
And a time when this could be particularly helpful is in the middle of the night.
If you are a person who wakes up and has racing thoughts and is worrying and so you can't fall back asleep, write it down.
Because part of the reason that your brain is just circling and circling is it wants to make sure you don't forget something important.
So when you memorialize it by writing it down, the brain relaxes and says OK, it's not up to me to remember this.
It's written down someplace.
This is important, but it won't be forgotten.
And that can help you get back to sleep.
Yes.
In fact, a listener sent me a little pad of paper and mini flashlight and pen to keep in my bedside table for just this purpose.
Oh, I love that.
Okay.
Okay, Gretchen.
Number 10 is work on your energy.
It is definitely easier to deal with worry when you have energy.
Yeah.
So that means making sure you get enough sleep, getting your movement.
You know, it's move 26.
So get your 26 minutes a day of moving around or whatever it is you want to do.
Another thing that I think really goes to people's energy is inundating themselves with upsetting news.
We all have an obligation to be informed citizens, but sometimes it's just more and more piling up but you're not really learning anything more.
And that can be very draining.
And as you say, having energy helps us manage every difficult situation.
So you want to think about keeping your energy high.
Yes.
Recently, a listener talked about treating yourself like an Olympian.
And that is definitely a way to keep your energy up.
Exactly.
Number 11, Gretchen, is identify the problem.
Yes.
Often we have bad feelings or general worries, but we don't really know what is the actual problem.
And it's very hard to solve the actual problem if you haven't identified it.
Back to the move.
Instead of thinking oh, I'm worried about the move, you could say I'm worried that I'm not far enough along in packing.
And we won't be ready by the time the movers come.
That is really the main thing that is on your mind.
Well, there's a lot of things that you could do if you're really worried about being ready with your packing.
But if you just have this general thing, like everything about moving is stressing me out, you might not take action on that specific worry as efficiently.
Because you haven't really identified exactly what the problem is.
The more you identify a specific problem, the more you identify a specific solution.
Yes.
And number 12 is seek more information on something that's worrying you.
Now this is a tricky one, because sometimes you don't want to just be Googling physical symptoms and scaring yourself.
But sometimes there is crucial information that you don't have.
You worry that you've missed a deadline.
Well, just look up the deadline.
This sounds so obvious, but a lot of times we really get lost in worries where Maybe this is just information that can be gained, or I'm really worried about this XYZ thing.
Look it up.
Is that something to worry about?
Because, if it is, you want to know that it's something to worry about, or maybe it's not something to worry about.
And along with that number, 13 is maybe you know somebody who could give you some perspective or information.
Maybe it's not even so much the facts of something, but maybe there's a wiser old friend that you could consult about a situation with your kids or something where they'll just have sex.
Something to say that might put your worry aside.
I remember I was talking about some parenting thing with a wiser, older friend of mine.
And she said, I don't know, I was like, should we do this or should we do that?
And I was going back and forth, which is the right choice?
I couldn't decide.
They seemed like an apple and an orange.
And she just said, well, I don't think that there's a wrong decision here.
Hmm.
She said, I think both could be good decisions.
And that was so helpful to me in my worry because all of a sudden she just reframed it.
But it was because of her greater perspective that she could see that I was getting lost in something that to her there's no wrong decision.
I find myself repeating that to people all the time now.
Yeah, I think in parenting it is very helpful to have others to run things by, especially when you're worried to have your text chain of people you can turn to and say, like I'm worried about this.
What should I do?
Or should I be worried about this?
Should I be worried?
Oftentimes people will say, no, don't worry about that.
So I think parenting is a place where you're turning to people is very helpful.
All right, Gretch coming up.
We have more suggestions about how to deal with worry, but first this break.
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Okay, Gretchen, we are back talking about worry.
Number 14 on our list is to start tracking.
Yeah, now this again is a very concrete thing to do.
And this is...
Often, if you have a worry, it's very helpful to start tracking it.
If you're worried about a physical symptom, if you're worried about a pattern of behavior, keep a record, because our memories can be very faulty.
You can have a very imprecise memory of how many times something has happened or when you first saw something.
And if you go to a professional or you're asking somebody for help, the first thing they're going to say is when did this start?
Or how often has this happened?
Or does this happen at a certain time of day?
And you want to be able to see those patterns.
And it might be that just by tracking it, you yourself will see these patterns.
Like oh, my husband and I always get in a fight when it's late at night and we're both really exhausted.
So we shouldn't talk about difficult subjects late at night when we're both exhausted, you know?
Tracking can be very helpful.
Number 15, Ellen, I suffer from this.
Beware of catastrophizing.
Okay, listen, explain what catastrophizing is.
So catastrophizing is when we magnify negative consequences and then assume they're certain to happen.
Yeah.
So an example would be, if my daughter flunks this test, she'll never graduate from high school.
If my sweetheart breaks up with me, I'll be alone forever.
I will never be happy again.
You have to remind yourself that most likely the worst thing won't happen.
Yes.
And even if it does, you will deal with it.
Right, right.
Number 16.
This has took me a long time to understand and that is to accept uncertainty and thinking about what you can and cannot change or affect.
Why worry if it's going to rain?
It's either going to rain or it's not going to rain.
The only thing you can do is to bring an umbrella.
You're worrying about the weather is not going to change it.
Oh, it'll affect the school picnic if it's raining, but so be it.
I mean, there's nothing to be gained from worrying about it.
And then listen, I've talked about this with plane tickets and things like that.
For me, it's a worry that I feel like is weighing on a particular choice, but it actually would apply to any choice that I would make.
So they all just cancel each other out.
So it's like well, if I book this flight, It might end up being the flight that gets delayed six hours, and I wish that I had picked a different flight.
But there's no way for me to know which flight is going to get delayed.
Any flight that I pick is equally likely or unlikely to have that.
Or like you're worried, oh, if my child goes to this college, maybe they won't make friends.
But the fact is making friends is going to be an issue wherever you go to college.
It's not like you could pick a college where you know that, oh, automatically friends will be made.
And so that kind of worry is because it applies equally to all students. possibilities.
They just all cancel each other out.
It's just unknowable.
Yes.
The number 17 is ask yourself do you need to worry about getting more information or do you make a decision?
And this is, again, very applicable to plane tickets.
Well, and Alyssa, we've talked about this all the time.
Like I think I do this more than you do, which is I procrastinate on something that I don't want to do or that I'm worried about, by pretending that I need to consult with other people and I need to get information where, in fact, I don't really need that.
I just need to move forward.
But I'm worried about making the decision.
So I want to offload it on other people, either by sort of making them also responsible for it, or at least using them as an excuse to delay.
So sometimes you're just like okay, I'm worried about this, but I just need to decide and accept that.
Yeah.
Number 18, if you're worried because you think you said something super cringy, remember that people tend to like us more than we think and they're more open to social gestures than we assume.
I think we have all experienced this kind of worry.
Yeah, so this is the idea.
You know about the likability gap, which is you probably aren't as cringy as you think.
People are more open to gestures than you think.
People aren't paying attention to you as much as you think.
We've all had that bad feeling.
But just reassure yourself.
Like yeah, I kind of feel lousy about it, but I'm not going to worry about it, because I might just be blowing this up in my head.
Somebody apologizes to you for something they said a week ago and you're like, I literally don't remember you saying that at all.
You know, this happens all the time.
Yeah, and I think remembering that human interaction is not perfect.
If you want to interact with humans, which is the key to a happy life then, you know, little mistakes will be made and that's okay.
But I think that's actually a really important point.
We talked about it a few episodes ago.
It's really important to remember that you will have moments of regret.
You will put your foot in your mouth.
You will make mistakes.
You will call somebody by the wrong name.
You will forget somebody.
I was just at a party the other night.
I had no memory of this guy.
Clearly, I had met him many times before.
He's somebody who went to high school with Jamie.
I felt bad.
I went to a party.
I had a really good time.
But there's this one moment where I really feel like I made a mistake.
I feel bad.
But you're right.
It's just part of it.
And Being worried about when you have people over to your house and you have all the anxiety and insecurity.
It's just part of what you have to do.
And I do think that it's reassuring to think of that.
Yes.
These things are worries, but they just go along with all of the positives.
And you can't have only the positive without the negative.
And then I think the classic line here is we've all done it.
Yes.
We've all done it.
We've all forgotten someone important's name.
We've all had our own name forgotten.
We've all said the wrong thing.
We've all had somebody say something really super untactful to us.
A friend of mine was saying she showed up at somebody's doorstep a day early for a party.
I mean, these things happen.
We've all done it.
Yep.
Number 19 is ask yourself if a friend described a situation what I think they should worry.
That's a very helpful suggestion.
So this is interesting.
Well, there's something called distant self-talk, which is when you talk to yourself as if you were a third person.
Like you say, well, hey, Gretchen. do you think it's right to worry about X, Y, Z?
And sometimes that gives us more perspective and we're often better at giving advice to other people.
I have seen this a lot with the emptiness situation, because parents have described to me situations where they're really, really worried about their children.
And I think to myself, but if a friend's child was doing that, Do you think that they would worry?
So, for instance, somebody was really worried because her son was going on an hour car trip to go to another college for a big party.
His roommate was going to drive.
Three people were going to go.
It was a daytime picnic type thing.
So it wasn't even a nighttime boozy party.
It was like a spring picnic or something like that.
Anyway.
To me, it sounded pretty wholesome.
They're going to go visit their friends at this other campus and they're going, you know, it's just whatever.
But she was very, very worried.
And I said, well, if my daughter were going on a car trip like that, would you worry?
And she was like, well, actually, no, I don't think I would be worried if she was going.
Now, it might have been that for some reason with her son, she had some particular reason to worry.
But I didn't get the sense that it was that.
I thought it was just the sense of oh, he's leaving campus and that feels kind of out of my control.
Or I don't know enough about it to feel comfortable.
But he's in college, so you're not really going to have that kind of information at that level that maybe you're used to.
Because when I was asking about my kid, she was like, oh, no, that's not such an issue.
So sometimes I think, imagine, well, if somebody else reported this, what would my response be?
It can be helpful.
It can be a way to get perspective.
Yeah.
I wonder if there's anything Gretch to asking oneself like if this was 1995, would I know about this or care about this?
Well, that's a really good question.
Yes.
I love a proverb, and one of the proverbs is what the eye doesn't see, the heart doesn't grieve over.
And I think that we definitely are seeing that difference in terms of information about kids and their goings-on.
Okay, finally, Gretch, number 20, reach out to others.
Okay, now this is a complex one.
And I was thinking about this because I was doing an interview with Dan Harris and there's a phrase or a teaching don't worry alone.
And I think that that's really true that often sharing a worry with somebody else makes you feel lighter.
They can give you perspective.
That wise older friend could give you good counsel.
You can get social support.
You can get helpful information.
But I think there's a but there.
What do you think, Elizabeth?
Oh, for sure.
I would say the biggest complaint Adam and Jack probably have about me is that I include them in my worry.
That I burden them with my worry.
Uh-huh.
Because they feel like they just have to hear it and they don't think that you're worrying about things that are necessary, or they feel like they need to convince you to cheer up, or it's just too redundant, kind of too repetitive.
I kind of think all of the above.
Now I will say one bit of complexity here is.
Many times in a family, I think, one person feels that they have the role of quote worrying and that if they don't do it, nothing will happen.
And then they resent, slash me, the other people not worrying.
One thing I'm kind of thinking during our discussion is maybe a way to think about it is rather than that oh, I feel it's my role to worry, if I phrased it as it's my role to prepare, and that I want to share preparation, because a lot of worrying is really about preparing for some event.
Yeah.
I think that's a really good way to communicate, because communicating we need to prepare suggests tasks to be done that should be divided appropriately.
Whereas worry is kind of like, well, you're just choosing to worry about that.
Yes.
As if you could just choose not to worry.
But your worry is actually in order to get things done.
Yes.
I definitely think that people divide up worries.
I'm so glad you raised this, Lisa.
I think this is a really important point.
So I will say this sometimes with Jamie.
I'll say something like, are you going to worry about this?
Because then I won't.
But if you're not going to, tell me, because then I will.
Somebody needs to deal with this.
But again, instead of worrying, I think it should be prepare.
I think that's better.
We need to prepare for this.
Are you going to do the preparation for this or do I need to do the preparation for this?
Because it's like you don't want both people to be preoccupied with something, but you certainly don't want neither person to be preoccupied with it.
And, I think, sometimes making it explicit instead of having like well, we're all going to play an equal role.
Yeah.
And the good thing is Gretchen, I think by setting aside worry this summer, I am kind of able to see these distinctions and figure out ways where hopefully, moving forward, I can be productive and get things done but not have the quote unquote worry.
Okay, Elizabeth, I have an idea for you, a happiness bully idea for you.
Oh, what?
Maybe what you should do is every time you feel yourself starting to worry, you should note it.
And then look for the patterns of what are the things that you're worrying about and when.
Because, even not to worry, it's going to float into your mind and then you're going to be like okay, but I'm not going to worry.
Because is it rumination and you're thinking about the past?
Or is it preparation and you're worried about the future?
Is it you're worried about your own tasks or is it really you're worried about other people doing their thing?
That you're like, are they going to do it or not?
They need to.
Is it the existential thing?
Like what's going to happen with. the fires.
Are we gonna have another fire this summer?
Or what's gonna happen with Hollywood?
Like, they're different categories.
I think you might get a real insight into your own nature, because part of this is in the future.
You're hoping that the summer will help in the future.
Because I have to say, as your sister, Elizabeth, this is not that apparent to me.
You do not worry to me that much.
You could worry to me more if you wanted to, because I can take it.
Maybe that would be helpful.
That is a very good idea.
I will try to do that.
Well, this was 20 ideas for addressing worry, but there are probably many, many more.
We would love to add to this list.
This is something that all of us face as a happiness stumbling block in life.
The right amount of worry is good.
Too much worry is not good.
What have you done in your own life to manage worry?
Let us know on Instagram, Threads, Facebook, TikTok.
Send us an email at podcast at gretchenrubin.com.
As always, you can go to the show notes.
This is happiercast.com slash 590 for everything related to this episode.
Yes.
Thanks to everybody for your ideas about how I could handle this this summer.
And we want more.
Absolutely.
And that is it for this episode of Happier.
Remember to try these suggestions for managing worry.
What did we miss?
Let us know what you tried and if it worked for you.
Thank you to our executive producer, Chuck Reed, and everyone at Lemonada.
And this week, it's not a rhyming reminder.
We are just reminding you that we so appreciate our sponsors, who allow us to bring the show to you for free.
And also to remind you that if you use our codes when you shop, you do a lot to support the show.
We really appreciate it.
Until next week, I'm Elizabeth Kraft.
And I'm Gretchen Rubin.
Thanks for joining us Onward and Upward.
Elizabeth, you can worry to me.
If you want to worry, you can worry to me.
Thank you.
Part of it is I don't want to worry to myself.
I want to decrease my overall worry.
Yeah, not this summer, but in future.
After Labor Day.
After Labor Day.
You'll be back in your full spectrum color dressing and you'll be back.
You'll be back.
Okay.
