Welcome to the Listening Time Podcast.
Hey everybody, this is Connor and you're listening to episode 196 of the Listening Time Podcast.
I hope you're all doing excellent and I hope that your English learning is going great and that this podcast is has been a big help for your listening comprehension.
I hope you're not tired of my voice now, because 196 episodes is a lot, so hopefully you're not tired of listening to me.
Hopefully the topics that I choose to talk about are interesting for you.
In today's episode, we're going to talk about the topic of haters.
Who is or what is a hater?
A hater is someone who hates someone else, or maybe they don't necessarily hate them, but they talk bad about them, talk negatively about them too much.
Usually online, so this could be something offline, but i'm gonna talk about it in the context of online haters.
So i think this is an interesting topic and it's something that uh, content creators like youtubers, for example, will talk about a lot, because people get hate comments and hate messages.
This is just a reality.
So I think that this will be an interesting topic to talk about today.
And I want to remind you that, for those of you who really want to talk to me in a conversation style class, If you think that that will be really helpful for your speaking, then you can feel free to check out my schedule, my availability.
I don't have a lot, but I do offer conversation classes.
And if one hour is too much for you or too expensive for you, then you can also try a 30-minute class.
I don't think I mentioned that before.
But if you want to check out my availability, the link is down below.
And remember to check out my advanced podcast episodes to practice with real English spoken fast.
The link is down below.
And check out my US Conversations podcast, in which I have conversations with people from all over the country, and sometimes even my own family members.
So if you're interested in that, that link is also down below.
All right, let's get started.
Are your ears ready?
You know what time it is.
It's listening time.
Okay, let's talk about haters.
So practically everyone who makes content online and has a big audience has haters.
This is really hard to avoid no matter what it is that you do.
And I'm not saying that we all have really horrible, violent haters.
No.
Sometimes we might use the word hater to refer to someone who leaves negative comments on your videos, unwarranted negative comments or comments that are overly negative.
By the way, when something is unwarranted, that means that it is undeserved.
You don't deserve that negative comment.
So let's talk about some reasons why haters exist.
So I wrote down a handful of reasons here.
The first one that I thought of is that people have hate inside of them.
This is a reality.
And I think it is normal to hate some things.
I know in today's world people will talk about the fact that you shouldn't hate.
Hate is bad.
Love is good.
You know what I'm talking about.
Of course love is good.
However, I think that there are some things that people should hate.
I think that it's normal to hate certain things.
Of course, some people will hate things they shouldn't hate, and that's not a good thing.
But I think that hate is actually a relatively normal feeling when it comes to some things.
There are some really wicked, evil things in this world and I think you'd be lying if you said that you didn't hate those horrible, wicked things.
So hate is normal to have and I'm not talking about just hating everyone and everything, but hate exists inside of people and some people channel their hate through online comments for some reason, and this is not always the best way to express your hate, unless maybe there's some really horrible, wicked online content and you are Denouncing it, meaning you are talking about how you disapprove of it.
It's bad.
But when it comes to just random online content creators.
It's probably not the best thing to do to just hate on them in their comments section without any reason, right?
But many people do that today.
Many people have a certain amount of hate in them, and Online is the place where they go to unleash that hate.
When you unleash something, that means that you let it go free, right?
So some people unleash their hate online.
That's the easiest way for them to express their hate.
So that's a reason why there are haters.
Another reason is because people disagree about things, and online content allows people to express disagreement.
Okay, content that you find online is often controversial and, Of course, there is a lot of content that isn't that controversial.
I think I make a lot of non-controversial content, if I'm being honest.
I don't think most of my content is controversial.
However, there are some things that I say that are controversial and that people disagree with.
I uploaded a YouTube video recently in which I said some things that some people found controversial not in a horrible way, but they didn't agree with what I said, and so they expressed their disagreement in the comment section.
I didn't receive hate in the comments section.
I'm not saying that those people were haters.
No, they were just disagreeing with me.
However, sometimes when people disagree online, it actually turns into hate, right?
And it's not just respectful disagreement.
It's actually really terrible, violent language and that kind of stuff, right?
So that is a little different from just what I received in the comment section of the video I made.
So there are things online that are controversial.
People disagree about these things.
Some people disagree in a normal, respectful way.
And other people disagree and unleash their hate.
So that's another reason why there is a lot of online hate.
And another reason why there are haters is that people have insecurities.
They have things that they don't feel good about when it comes to their own selves.
Some things that they're not confident about or whatever.
And they might view certain online content as an attack on them personally.
So they feel like their lifestyle, their views, their opinions are being attacked.
They feel insecure about that, and they feel the need to defend themselves, right?
I think one solution to this is Just know that people are going to contradict you and disagree with you.
That's the world we live in.
And so it's good to try to become more secure with your own self, your opinions, knowing that it's okay that people might disagree with you and say the opposite.
But if you feel more insecure, you're probably going to view different online content as attacking you personally right, and in reality, a lot of it is not meant to do that.
The the creator is just expressing their opinions, right?
So some people feel the need to defend themselves when they see some content that goes against their lifestyle, their opinions.
And these people have some insecurities maybe, and because of that, they start hating on the creator of that content.
It's not wrong to disagree and to write that in the comments.
That's definitely not wrong.
But sometimes, like I said, people can go overboard and just start hating on that content creator in the comments or hating on another commenter even.
So that's another reason why there are online haters.
Another reason is that it's easy to write mean things online.
If you've noticed, it's a lot easier to write something, type it on your keyboard with no consequences afterwards.
That's easier than saying something hateful to a person's face.
There are consequences in that situation.
So it's a lot easier to write mean things online.
It's much easier.
And so it's just easy to hate online.
The consequences are not that great for doing that.
And so that just makes it easier Pretty simple to hate people online.
And one other reason I thought of why online haters exist is that some online content is really displeasing.
Let's be honest.
There is some content that you're gonna watch, you're gonna see, and you just hate that content.
You hate everything they said in that video.
I think we've all had that experience before, and so some content really displeases people for whatever reason.
And even if you're not insecure about your own position or your own life or the subject that's being talked about, maybe you just find that content really displeasing, really disgusting, terrible or whatever, and you just want to show your disgust with that content.
So that's something that happens as well.
All right.
Now let me talk about just some thoughts, some notes I wrote down regarding the topic of online haters.
I think that everybody who makes online content needs to be able to handle this reality that they will have haters.
I think that that's a necessary thing.
If you can't If you cannot handle that, you should not make online content.
Let me repeat that.
If you can't handle having hate from random people online, you should not make online content.
You should spend a lot more time offline than online.
You can live a normal life offline, have a normal career and not experience this.
Once you start to make content online and your audience starts to grow, you will realize that people will come and hate on your content.
They'll hate you for many different reasons.
And if you can't handle that, then you really shouldn't make online content, because it can ruin your life.
If people really place a lot of value on their online image and how people view them online, when they receive hateful comments, that can just tear down their self-esteem, their confidence.
When something tears something down, that means it destroys it.
It lowers it by a lot.
So getting online hate receiving, that can really tear down people's self-esteem, self-image and it can really affect people.
So if you can't handle that, you should not make online content.
I think that most people feel affected by online hate, even if they say that they aren't affected by it.
I'm sure a lot of you have heard content creators say this, where they say I don't care about the haters.
It doesn't affect me.
I've been doing this for long enough.
And I'm not saying that they're lying.
I'm not calling them liars.
But I think that most people feel at least a little bit affected by online hate.
And I'm not going to lie.
When I receive a hateful message, it doesn't feel good.
I'm not just like, oh, great.
Another comment, right?
That's not my reaction.
I don't feel depressed and it doesn't ruin my day.
That doesn't happen, but it doesn't feel good.
Okay.
And if you're less equipped to deal with online hate, then it can completely ruin your day.
So people, even if they say that, oh yeah, you just got to ignore the haters.
Don't worry.
Yeah.
I agree with that advice, but just know that it's still going to be unpleasant to receive hateful comments.
OK.
Don't pay too much attention to that idea if you want to make content online, because it's normal to feel a little bit negative when you receive a hateful comment.
What you need to do is actually work on how you respond and react to to that.
But it's not abnormal to feel negative when someone comes and hates on your video or your photo or whatever.
So I think that most people feel affected by online hate even if they say that they don't care.
Just know that.
Another point I wanted to mention regarding online hate and regarding really heated arguments online is that Arguments are rarely won online.
So if you're someone who tries to argue with people online or argue with your own hater let's say you make videos and someone is hating on your videos and you're arguing with them and going back and forth.
Honestly, this usually ends up being pointless because arguments are rarely won online.
I think that if you think back to all the times you've seen people fighting with each other in comment sections of videos, you probably won't be able to remember a comment where someone said oh, you're right and I'm wrong.
Sorry that I said what I said.
I agree with you now.
I don't know if that comment exists online, because arguments that are in the comment sections of videos or photos or whatever it may be, these arguments, are rarely won.
People just fight each other, call each other names, hate each other.
And at the end of the day, there was no real point there. in doing that.
So that's another thing I wrote down.
One interesting point I wrote down is that sometimes haters actually have a point.
Sometimes you'll receive a comment.
I don't think that this is super common for most people, but once in a while, for example, I will get a negative comment that is overly negative.
It's not just someone disagreeing with me respectfully, like there definitely is an excess of negativity there, like it didn't need to be that negative.
But there is some truth to the comment and i know that there's some truth to what they're saying.
And these are the types of comments that can sometimes affect you the most.
They bother you the most because you can't just write them off as being ridiculous.
When you write someone off, write something off as being ridiculous, we're saying that you just say oh, that makes no sense, i'm not going to be bothered by that, that's ridiculous.
That's basically what I'm saying when I say I'm writing them off as being ridiculous.
So these comments that are overly negative, maybe even hateful, but have some truth to them, these are complicated because yes, you shouldn't let the hate in the comment really affect your life, affect your day.
However, I think that it's wise to at least listen to the point that they have despite the hate.
Just forget the tone that they used, the negative words they used or whatever, and just really focus on the point that they're making and be honest with yourself.
Is there truth to what they're saying?
And if there is, how can you address that and make that better?
This has happened to me not a lot, but every once in a while it does happen.
And it's a little hard because I don't like the comment, but it feels a little bit personal because I know there's some truth to what they're saying.
So I think that in those cases, it's wise to listen to what they're saying, and while ignoring the overly hateful parts of the comment.
So that's another thing I wanted to mention.
And lastly, I just wrote down a few possible ways to handle this situation.
When you get, I hate whether it's online or whatever.
I'm talking mostly about online, but this is what I would normally do.
Number one is I usually don't respond.
Sometimes I do, but I usually don't respond.
I usually just read it, take a deep breath and move on after that.
And I don't really think about it again.
Of course, like I said before, it feels a little negative in the moment, but then I move on.
So honestly, that's one of the best ways to address this situation is just by not responding, just moving on from it.
Sometimes I respond with a nice message if it's not overly hateful.
If there's just uh, a comment, that is disagreeing with me, but they're maybe being a little too negative.
Like you can tell that they're really mad or something.
Um, Every once in a while, I'll respond, but with a nice message, right?
And I won't try to make an argument out of it.
It's just something I want to address quickly in a polite way and move on.
And then I usually don't go back and look at their response after that.
So responding with a nice message usually helps, because it makes the person feel a little silly for being too negative towards you, right?
Another thing that I think is important is if you decide to make online content, you need to expect hate.
Like I said before, if you can't handle hate, you should not make online content.
But I would even say that you need to expect it and not try to do everything you can to avoid it, because then you will never say anything that might be slightly controversial, because you're afraid of what people might say.
I think that you should expect hate.
You shouldn't go seek hate.
You shouldn't want people to be super hateful to you in comments probably, but you should expect it.
It's part of the game.
And lastly, I think it's important to just work on your own insecurities and the things that really offend you in your own life and the sensitive points that you have, because people will attack those things online.
And that's something that can really affect you if you have trouble with this in your normal life.
So I think it's good to work on your own insecurities in your own life.
And then online hate won't affect you as much.
So those are just some thoughts I had.
Thankfully, I don't get a lot of hate.
It's just once in a while, but I do get some negative comments from time to time and I need to respond to them correctly, or just not not respond and not let them affect me in a really negative way.
So this is still something that even I, an English teacher, have to deal with from time to time.
So hopefully this was interesting for you and hopefully it was good practice for your listening.
Remember to check out the link for my conversation class availability.
You can schedule a 30-minute class or a one-hour class if you'd like.
There isn't a lot of availability and this won't be for the vast majority of you, okay?
For the vast majority of you, it'll be more interesting to sign up for my membership through to get my training for your listening, your pronunciation, my advanced episodes, and also you can check out my US Conversations podcast.
This is great practice because it gives you the opportunity to listen to native speakers talking to each other, and that's an essential skill that you need to develop to be able to understand when more than one person is talking.
So that link is also down below.
All right.
Thank you so much for listening to this episode.
And I'll talk to you on the next episode of Listening Time.
