This is an All Ears English Podcast, episode 117 the easiest way to start a conversation in English with a stranger.
Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast where you'll finally get real native English conversation and fluency for business and life.
We believe in connection, not perfection, when it comes to learning English.
Now here are your hosts Lindsay McMahon, the English adventurer, and Aubrey Carter, the IELTS whiz, coming to you from Arizona and Boston, USA.
You don't need to always feel awkward when you start a conversation with a native speaker on the street.
Today, get two clear tactics to start a conversation in English on the street or in the park.
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Hey, Aubrey.
Good to have you on the show today.
How's everything going?
Yes, great.
Over here.
How are you?
Oh my gosh, I'm feeling great.
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Yes, we do.
I know it's such a fun team.
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So today, Aubrey we're talking about you know easy ways to start a conversation in English with a stranger, because I think a lot of our listeners do struggle.
We want to connect with people.
We want to have that conversation in the park, on the street, maybe at a restaurant, if you're dining alone and there's someone next to you.
But how can we do it?
Yes, exactly.
This is one of the trickiest things for me.
In Spanish right now, I really want to create these opportunities for conversations.
Sure.
But it is tricky sometimes to know, how can I approach someone?
What could I first say?
You don't want to make it awkward.
Yes, exactly.
So in today's episode we're going to have a bunch of ways, a bunch of ideas for you guys on how to do it.
But so there are two kind of props that we can use, right?
Yes.
So two kinds of props.
One of them is if the person has a pet, a dog.
Usually they're walking a dog.
We don't really walk our cats.
So usually it's a dog.
And what would be the second thing that could be a prop, a conversation starter, Michelle?
Yes.
If someone has kids or if you have kids.
This works all the time for me.
I can give you some details.
Okay.
All right.
I want to hear you said you have a little story about your trip to Mexico.
Tell us how this how this goes for you.
So I'm constantly looking for opportunities to practice my Spanish when I'm in Mexico.
And it's not always easy.
There will be people there who speak Spanish.
But what do you say?
How do you start the conversation?
But when I have my kids with me, the twins, it's so much easier because they are so outgoing.
And they'll just go up and start talking to someone.
So we were on the beach.
And they were collecting shells.
And there were some cute Mexican ladies collecting seashells.
And they ran up to them and asked if they could see theirs.
And so I was able to, I started speaking to them in Spanish and they responded.
We had this amazing conversation that I don't know if we could have started if my kids weren't the ones.
Because it's not awkward if a little kid is talking to you because they don't know better.
Yeah.
Right.
So what do you do typically if your kid runs up, talks to the person first and you're like oh, this is a good opportunity to practice my Spanish?
What would you say as you first go up and catch up with your kid?
What would you say to that person?
Yeah, so often I'll say something to my child sort of with them there.
So that's what I did this time, right?
They were talking and I was like oh, tell them things, thank you, because she had given my daughter a shell.
So she said, thank you.
And then my daughter wanted to say it in Spanish.
So then I said, oh, this is so fun.
I've been learning Spanish.
I've been excited to start learning, you know, to try and practice.
You know I'm like and they're immediately like excited that someone's trying to learn Spanish and wants to practice.
I think when I use that phrase like oh, I need to practice my Spanish.
That disarms, it pulls down walls and people are realizing like Oh, you know, there's no judgment here.
This is just someone excited to practice.
That's good.
And we do talk about a lot on this show about how can you disarm the other person and also bring down your defenses right.
You don't have to go in with the perfect thing that you could say in Spanish.
You say, I actually just need to practice, right?
My Spanish is weak.
And what does that do?
That puts a smile on their face, right?
How do they react physically to Oh, yes.
Always.
They smile and they'll laugh and they often will say, like your Spanish is great, because I'm saying the phrase that I've said a million times, which is like sorry, I don't speak Spanish very well, but I really need to practice.
You perfected that phrase.
Right.
That's good.
Yes, and now I'm getting to the part where I can understand what they say back and continue the conversation.
And then I often, if we hit a word I don't know, I'll just say in Spanish like oh, how do you say that in Spanish?
And they always seem really happy to share, right?
I think it was seashell this time.
I was like, oh, como se dice this?
You know, just point at the seashell.
And then it becomes this sort of spirit of collaboration and learning some words.
And then my kids started asking, how do you say that?
How do you say that?
Do we want to teach any phrases today for our listeners?
You know, some of these might apply to kids and dogs and some of them just one or the other.
Yes, exactly.
Because whether if someone's at like a park with their kids.
They always will welcome a cute compliment about their kids.
And the same thing.
Like you were saying someone who's walking their dog, you know, if you use the phrase like oh, how cute.
When did you get him?
Yes.
Yeah, when did you get him or her?
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Or how old is another one?
How old is he or she?
And that could apply to kids or dogs, right?
Of course.
Yep.
You know, they might ask you how old or, oh, how adorable, right?
I love that expression, adorable.
Yes.
How adorable.
How old is she?
Or how old is he?
We do get it's funny because our twins both have long hair.
So often people think they're both girls.
Poor William.
He's quite delicate looking too.
So I offer, how old are they?
And they'll, or how old is she specifically about him?
But I'm never offended.
Don't worry about that.
You know?
Yeah.
No, totally.
This sounds like such a good experience for your kids to be in Mexico and being able to be exposed to the language from such a young age.
I mean, that's amazing.
They got really excited.
They came back and they're like, we want to learn more Spanish.
And They're not in Spanish classes at school, so I'm trying to help them learn some at home.
But you're right to have a positive experience early with the language and see, I could use this.
I could use this in my life is really motivating.
Yeah, it's also cool how you guys are.
You know, this is not like a huge big deal vacation.
It's just kind of a weekend trip for you guys, right.
So you're not making a huge deal out of it.
You're putting them in the culture in a way that's so natural.
It's just we're just here for the weekend.
It's kind of I like the idea as opposed to making a big deal.
It happens more often this way.
So they'll become fluent in Spanish at some point.
I'm pretty sure.
For sure.
That's a huge perk of living in Arizona that we're so close to the border.
We have that opportunity.
But also because of that, there are a lot of Spanish speakers who live here in Phoenix.
So we're very much motivated to and it's a lot for, like a lot of you listeners out there, you know there are a lot of English speakers that live in your town, in your city, and it is motivating because you want to be able to communicate with them.
I love that.
That's so good.
That's so good.
So what else could we say?
So if we're talking about let's imagine that the person has a dog going back to the dog piece, you could say something like is he friendly or can I pet him?
Not for kids, but for dogs.
Right.
But this is combined because I have one daughter who's just obsessed with dogs.
So every time we see a dog, she wants to pet it.
So that kind of forces the interaction where I will ask like, oh, do you mind if my daughter pets...
You know, your dog and then they'll always say, yes, of course.
And then, of course, we're going to chat while my kid is petting their dog.
I mean, it is true that having a dog really opens up a lot of conversations for you.
And, you know, not life changing conversations, but conversations that just kind of make the day a little more pleasant.
You know for sure right, it takes all the awkwardness out of it.
These are interactions that natives have all the time.
Right, this is the best.
Just to ask someone about their kids, ask someone about their dog is so normal and natural.
They expect it, they welcome it and yeah, you can also ask you know what?
What breed is your dog?
What kind of dog is she?
And most dog owners love to talk about their Oh, they do.
Oh, totally.
They'll say, oh, he has a little bit of this little German shepherd, a little border collie.
They will talk forever about it.
But yeah, I mean, I love the idea.
I mean, both kids and dogs are a great way to start a conversation with someone on the street.
So, guys, if you do have that opportunity.
Do this, right?
Take advantage of this opportunity.
Right, Aubrey?
Yes, exactly.
And think of how awkward it might be if you, you know, just sit back while either your child's petting your dog or who knows what.
Yeah.
You can just diffuse all of that awkwardness.
Just even if you're a little shy, right?
Force yourself to make that connection.
Don't worry about your grammar.
They're going to be excited to chat with you and just break down that wall.
I love that idea.
This has been a great episode.
Lots of strategies and tactics that you guys can put into action right away.
So good.
So guys, if you are not following All Ears English, make sure you hit follow.
In the next episode, we're going to talk a little bit about brain science and learning English.
So I can't wait to get into that one, Aubrey.
Yes.
Awesome.
I will see you there.
All right.
See you there.
Take care.
Bye.
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