Stop Rejecting Yourself: The Power of Pursuing What You Want

In this episode of Before Breakfast, host Laura shares a powerful piece of advice: if there is something you desire, you must go for it. The core message is simple yet profound—do not act as your own gatekeeper by preemptively rejecting yourself before others have the chance to decide.

The Fallacy of Self-Rejection

Laura highlights a common behavioral pattern often cited in professional contexts: women frequently hesitate to apply for jobs unless they meet every single qualification, whereas men are more likely to apply if they meet only 60%. While this statistic is interesting, Laura argues that the gender distinction is less important than the underlying mindset. Regardless of your background or gender, if you have a reason to believe you could excel in a role, you should apply.

By not applying, you are effectively "rejecting yourself." Laura emphasizes that you do not need to do the work of the decision-makers for them. As the saying goes, "you miss 100% of the shots you don't take." If you want to achieve a goal, you must be willing to take the shot.

Applying the Principle Across Life

This philosophy extends far beyond the professional realm. Laura identifies several key areas where self-rejection limits our potential:

• Education and Skill Development: If you have always wanted to enroll in a competitive university program, you should apply. Even if the institution might reject you, it is not your responsibility to reject yourself on their behalf. Similarly, if you want to take a master class with a famous musician, you should audition. Let them be the ones to say no.
• Community and Service: If you have an interest in serving on the board of a nonprofit organization, express that interest to the executive director or board chair. Do not assume you are not needed or wanted.
• Social Connections: We often hesitate to reach out to friends because we assume they are too busy. Laura urges listeners to "go ahead and extend the invitation." She shares a personal anecdote about managing to "squeeze in a playdate" with a busy family on a Sunday. Even though the time was limited to 45 minutes, the effort was worth it because they didn't assume it wouldn't work.

Embracing Uncertainty

The world will often tell us "no" without our help. By preemptively deciding that we cannot have something, we deny ourselves the possibility of success. Laura concludes with a reminder that while you may indeed be rejected, you might also be accepted. By pursuing what you want, you open the door to opportunities that would otherwise remain closed. As she aptly puts it, "you just don't know" the outcome unless you take the initiative. Don't let the fear of a "no" prevent you from seeking the experiences you truly desire.