Conan O'Brien needs a fan.
Want to talk to Conan?
Visit teamcoco.com slash callconan.
Okay, let's get started.
Hey, Conan O'Brien here and this is our third podcast episode about my Max series.
Conan O'Brien Must Go.
This is the third because today, our third episode of Conan O'Brien Must Go drops, and this one...
Maybe a personal favorite of mine.
It is Austria and it is jam packed with foolishness, inanity and insanity.
I'm I'm a man who's never been afraid to put on a fake mustache or beard.
You'll be seeing plenty of that in this episode.
Yeah, I am very happy with this episode.
And it was a little bit of a strange one for circumstances.
I will explain, but first I'd like to tell you who's here with me.
It's my team, my squad, my girl squad, who helps me with all of these episodes.
The nuclear core behind all the travel shows going back to Conan Without Borders on TBS and now The Max Show.
You got Mike Sweeney.
Hello, Mike.
Hello, Conan.
And you also have Jesse Gaskell.
Hello, Jesse.
Hi, Conan.
Thanks for having us.
And, of course, Jose Arroyo.
Hey.
Hi, Conan.
And this is Austria.
Usterreich.
Usterreich.
Usterreich.
And this one was a little bit strange because not to get too heavy, but I just think it's worth, you know, noting how we did it, which is quite unusual.
Yes.
We went to Austria.
Late November, I got the call about hosting the Oscars.
I said, yes, I would like to do that.
And then we asked Nina Rosenstein at Max, is it okay if we do that?
And she said yes, we're thrilled with you doing the Oscars, but we do need you to finish up the last travel show.
That would be great if you could do that.
And we said, of course.
So we immediately rushed off to Austria to start shooting.
And we were working our way across the country.
And I think we were maybe halfway through our travel show.
We were.
Exactly halfway.
Halfway through when I got a call that my father had passed away.
And so immediately we dropped everything.
I jumped in a van, flew a couple of flights back to Boston, got there.
And then two days after that, arriving, my mom passed away.
And so it was this very powerful, strange time.
And it was this double funeral and everything was sort of chaotic and hard to process.
And then a really lovely gesture I'll just pass along, is that suddenly at the funeral in Boston Mike Sweeney shows up with Jeff Ross, with Sonam of Session, with Jason Chalemi, with Adam.
And if I'm forgetting anyone, tell me.
But that meant a lot to me.
So I want to thank you guys for doing that.
You then charged me for your airfare, which I thought was-
I had Celtics tickets.
You had Celtics tickets.
But anyway, that blew my mind when you guys walked into the church.
That was, I'll never forget that.
And Jesse, I don't know why you weren't there.
I wasn't invited.
They didn't tell me they were going.
Yeah.
And actually you came and I had a bouncer out front.
I was the only guy that had a bouncer at a wake, at an Irish wake.
It's a private property.
Yeah.
But anyway, it was... So that happens.
And then suddenly we're into... It's Christmas.
Then the fires.
Oh, my God.
Then dislocated from my home and we're working on the Oscars.
I'm living in a hotel.
Craziness.
And then uh, the mark twain.
Then the mark twain thing happened after the oscars.
Yeah, and then uh, it was immediately the day after the twain.
The next morning, we all jumped on planes yes, and flew to austria to continue.
The austria show was like pick it back up.
Yeah, exactly right.
And um, you're running out of excuses.
You're running out of excuses, no more dead parents, but i'm getting another award.
We're sick of you and your made-up awards.
I'm getting the O. Henry Award.
And there's a twist at the end where there's no award.
So anyway, we go back to Austria, and it was...
The first time we've ever done that for three days.
So wind it up.
But what was very interesting is that because of all this stuff that had happened before and because I was kind of running on fumes, I think I was sillier during those three days.
Oh, my God.
I was extra crazy silly and pre-associating like someone on drugs and that.
So when you guys put the show together.
You were in a fugue state.
I was in a fugue state.
Perfect for Viennas.
No, it really was.
And I think all of that combined makes it a very interesting travel series.
And one that, I mean, I watch it and I know that it's like bifurcated.
It's divided between this is before I hear about my parents.
This is much later afterwards.
I'm back.
But... the viewer wouldn't know that, but it's just interesting.
And we also, whether exactly, exactly the same four months later.
Yeah, exactly.
Well, it was Christmassy.
There was some Christmassy vibes, some decorations, but then um, but yeah, pretty much you'd never know.
Yeah.
Uh, I just brought it up because I thought people like inside baseball and that is something that's happened in that show.
That's never happened.
We've never had to leave a country and then come back to it a couple of months later to finish one show.
Um, But there's so many silly little ideas in that show.
You guys go.
We went back.
We went back specifically to have you record in Vienna because we had done other parts of the country already.
And then we paused it when we were in Linz and you got the word about your dad.
And...
I remember you came down to the breakfast area and it was just you and me and you said there's no easy way to say this, but my father passed away.
And then Mike Sweeney and Jeff Frost came in and you just said I know one thing I won't be taking a yodeling lesson today.
Yeah. because that was on the schedule for that day.
That was on the schedule for that day.
I was gonna meet up with a fan and learn how to yodel.
I know one thing.
And I just knew that like, you can't, if you hear about- You weren't in the right headspace.
I don't think so.
But also I knew that if you hear about your father passing away unexpectedly And you go right okay, time to yodel in leather shorts.
Exactly.
That is the definition of a sociopath.
Sociopath, yeah.
So you were a more evolved sociopath than you took a car to the airport and you went home.
You know what's weird is that you guys were very nice and you were like-
Conan, you need to pack.
And of course, Jeff was great.
He was like, and Chalemi, they were like, we got a car downstairs.
It's gonna take you to, they scrambled.
You're gonna take this airline to this city and then to that city, and that's gonna get you to Heathrow.
And then you're gonna go.
And I'm acting like I'm all together, like, oh, yeah, no, no, that's okay.
And look, these things happen.
And I'm putting a watch on, just a watch, a regular watch.
And I kept putting it on upside down and backwards.
And I did that like five times.
Oh, wow.
I was so... On the surface, I was acting like, uh-huh, uh-huh, I appreciate that.
And I guess we can pick up this later.
I should go home.
But in total sort of Irish Catholic denial about whatever I'm feeling.
And the way I knew it was that I kept putting my watch on, and then I'd look at it and it was facing down and away like this.
And then I'd do it again and it would be on this side.
And I was like...
I suddenly didn't know how to do the most elemental thing in the world, which is put a watch on.
Well, it's nice to know you're human.
I mean, really.
Or he has a human side.
Okay, I guess that's fair.
Exactly, exactly.
How do we know that I just don't know how to put a watch on?
Exactly.
He's watch-lexing.
You look at me and I've got this angling from my earlobe.
Well, see you later.
Oh, that wasn't a sign of mourning.
But we went back specifically to get the capital city, which is what we had sort of— Yeah, Vienna waited for you.
Exactly.
Nice.
Nice, nice.
We spent a couple—after you left the first time, we had to cool our heels in Vienna for a few days.
And while we were there, we were there alone with Jordan.
We shot some stuff with him.
Which is Dante's eighth layer of hell.
Six through eight.
And we shot something with him, which we ended up using.
So that worked out.
But we went back to Vienna.
The fan who was supposed to meet us in Linz, where he lived.
We had him meet us in a park in Vienna and he was wonderful.
Yes.
And I did yodel.
You did.
You learned to yodel.
I did yodel.
And your watch went on correctly.
You dissociated enough to yodel again.
Yes.
Everyone's going to check how you're wearing your watch in this show.
It was a very musical episode.
Oh, yeah.
Very musical.
And it's perfect for Austria.
Oh, one of my favorite things is a segment where we – uh, we visit the exact spot where julie andrews did the open for the sound of music.
Yes and um, jose arroyo, it's not easy to coordinate no no, not easy to coordinate, but but, but it's the exact exact spot, like literally down to exactly where i'm standing.
It's secret that you have to get.
We had to go through a lot of different channels.
You have to go to Julianne's property.
You have to talk to all the actors who played the children and they have to be lined up on a staircase.
Public is not allowed there.
It's on private property and the owner is very reticent because 10 years ago they let ABC shoot there and I think they felt like it over-publicized it or something.
Well, it was an episode of Lost.
Exactly.
They were just mad that it didn't wrap up.
But you were going to say, Jose...
Oh, Jose wrote this song, which is all about us not being able to clear the sound of music.
We couldn't get the rights.
Of course you can't get the rights.
So you wrote a song about that, which is in a similar vein, but of course not.
And no lawyer could find any similarity.
But it was...
And it's really great work, Jose, and very creative and the way it's shot.
And I was very... Every now and then we get to do a little set piece.
Like one of my favorite travel shows from the TBS days was the Italy show, because we do a little Italian movie.
Every now and then we get to do a little... And I really love those.
I mean, I love the Nothing will ever beat spontaneous fun moments that we have with and I'll say that from my late night career and just in general, and nothing will ever those are my favorite moments.
But every now and then there's just a little moment to have a set piece where we get to really shoot it like cinematographers and choreograph it a little bit.
And you wrote this music and we kept.
And when we get into those things I'm obsessive about, If Jose has put this much effort into it, I want it to be just right too.
So I'll ask for multiple takes.
I won't say, hey, we got to go.
I want to make sure it's just what you have in your head.
Thank you.
You were in later.
I was going to say it was cold and it was cold up on that mountain.
Yeah.
You know, Julie Andrews, it was a helicopter, of course, in 1965.
But we had a drone.
That she shot it.
It came out in 65.
Yeah, they shot it in 64.
Right, but I thought people would relate more to when the movie came out.
I think people relate to the truth.
Get a room, you two.
Okay.
Anyway, when they shot it, they used a real helicopter.
Oh, who gives a fuck?
They used a real helicopter with Julie Andrews.
And true story, the helicopter, they didn't know how to get the shot.
And the guy who was like directing the movie said, I'll do it.
And he got in the helicopter and he's like hanging out of a helicopter.
But the helicopter has to come really close to Julie Andrews.
And the backwash from a helicopter is a serious deal.
So it's.
You know, fans of that movie, who know the behind the scenes, know that when she's going, when the music is swelling and she's walking up the hill, as I recreate, we're doing it with a drone.
She was doing it with a massive like Vietnam era helicopter.
She got flattened a couple of times by just the wind.
She got knocked down and they kept making her do it over and over and over again.
And apparently at one point, I've heard Julie Andrews lost your temper.
I was like, what the fuck?
Let's just fucking pull this shit together.
I got fucking knocked down like 15 fucking times.
But she did it at the highest register with a beautiful multi-octave ring.
Fuck.
Fuck. you fucking assholes.
They also trucked it.
Like there's a scene where she walks along a Brook and, and through some poplar trees.
They, that was all trucked in.
They built a stream.
They ran a street.
Yeah.
All that was manufactured.
Yeah.
But anyway, um, that was, Oh, you know what else?
We had this great drone shot.
There's a, a ski lift to one side and all these new buildings.
So our, our great graphics artist, uh, Chris Weller.
Chris Weller painted them out.
Yeah.
He also painstakingly repaired my face so that I appear to be prettier in the late 30s and a male.
You lowered the hem of your lederhosen by three inches.
There was an issue there with standards.
Can I say one thing, which is.
This better be good.
Well, well, speaking of we should identify this is Aaron Blair.
We call him Blair.
You know, we started this show in Zurich.
You know, we landed and we started in Zurich.
We spent the night in Zurich and kind of these on these shows.
We have a local crew.
And so we're meeting these people for the first time.
And does anyone do you want to talk about kind of what happened?
That's a great story.
Yeah.
Well, anyway, so we're kind of running around.
Jose was in the bathroom, so we're kind of waiting for Jose.
Jose's always in the bathroom.
And we're all like, where's Jose?
Where's Jose?
And we're all on the bus ready to go.
And we're going to drive.
He's seated on the toilet urinating.
Yes.
But I think, Sweeney, we were going to drive to Austria.
We're driving to the town of Feldkirch.
Feldkirch, right, right.
And so finally, and I kind of get off the bus, and here comes Jose and we're like okay, we're all ready to go.
And we start going and we're traveling.
Driving, driving, driving, driving.
Driving, driving, driving for a while.
And then in the very, I'm kind of sitting towards the back.
Like 40 minutes.
40 minutes, a good, a solid 40 minutes.
And this recounting of it better be not as long.
It's right.
Go ahead.
And then I hear behind me there's some talking.
And our drone guy stands up.
He goes, where are we going to the city center?
And everyone's kind of talking.
And then we go, no, we're driving to Feldkirch.
He goes, I have to go to the city center.
I can't go to Feldkirch.
And it just happened that he was not our drone guy.
He was a random tourist who got on the bus.
He saw us all getting on a bus.
Thought it was a tour bus.
He thought it was a hotel shuttle bus.
Way out of our way, way out of his way.
And he suddenly realized that he's part of a Conan O'Brien must go shoot.
That's taking him to God knows where he's probably going to have to.
No, I'm with Stanley Tucci.
Yeah, I'm supposed to be with Ava Longoria.
We were driving for like almost an hour.
Yes.
Oh, and he looked quite upset.
He was upset.
And it's not our fault.
I think someone at the hotel said, I think he said, is that the bus to the city center?
And someone at the hotel went, yeah, you know, and so off he went.
But, uh, We had to drop him off at a gas station.
He literally was 40 minutes away and we totally left him at a gas station.
And he was in a wheelchair.
And he was not.
Well, he was on a respirator, though.
I also want to point out that my first memory of I wake up and someone had gifted me this cool little I like travel gear and someone had gifted me this really cool small hairdryer.
It's like folds out.
I think it's Japanese.
It folds out.
It's kind of got a sleek, cool robotic ray gun look.
And I was like, oh, cool.
I'm going to bring this to Austria.
So that morning that we got up in Zurich, I look out the window.
Oh my God, it's Zurich.
I take a shower.
I get out of the shower and I plug in my little hairdryer and I turn it on.
I heard a .
Every light, not just in my room, but I think on my floor went out and I smelled that smoke.
There's a smell that an electrical appliance has, which means it will never live again and it cannot be repaired.
And so that smoke drifted up.
And I looked down at this cool little neat Japanese and folded it up really neatly and dropped it in the trash can.
And then went downstairs and went, I think I just shorted it.
They were running around downstairs like there's a major explosion on the third floor.
And I said, someone was using a Japanese hairdryer.
But it was later explained to me that you have to bring a, just using the converter isn't enough.
You need a voltage transformer, which I didn't have.
So my apologies to the hotel in Zurich, which is still, I'm told, without power.
Right.
And there have been many casualties.
And he's being sued by the family of that dead tourist who died at the gas station.
Okay, that's not... I don't like that we took that too far.
And I apologize to everyone.
Not far enough.
Or not far enough, yeah.
But... So very musical.
And you encountered really great fans there as well.
And that's part of our homework, which is finding the people that you get to see when you get to the country.
That's what brings us there.
And then we jump off from there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's always meet the fan.
And then the fan is my reason, is my way in.
And I use them.
I use my fans.
You do.
You ring them dry.
Then you pivot.
And then there is a segment that I'm...
I think there are the two segments that we shot in Vienna that I'm really happy with because I think to a degree it's me.
I don't know what happens to me.
It's classic Conan O'Brien.
If you put me in a certain outfit or a certain milieu uh, i start um, i start babbling.
And one is at the uh, sigmund freud uh, sigmund freud's home and office that i visited uh, and the other there's also a snow globe museum right, you were riffing a lot, and then uh, and then there's uh finally uh, singing with the vienna boys choir um, So those are all ones where I felt very much at home, like this is me.
If I was put on this earth for any reason, it was to do this.
And that's both the good news and the bad news.
Well, that's amazing that that feels so comfortable for you, because I think...
I don't know.
I watch and I think, wow, that would be a lot of stress to be thrust into this situation.
And we often do.
I mean, we throw you into these shark infested waters a lot of times, but then it's like that's.
You guys gave me a beard and a cigar to let me speak in a corny Viennese accent.
And you looked, I have to say the transformation.
Yeah. was amazing.
Very funny.
Fantastic.
Well, I am very happy with... I was very happy with... I mean, I enjoyed making this season.
Austria, despite the complicated emotions involved in that show, might be my favorite, for just Yeah.
You know, I don't know.
It has...
It's so funny.
It's so surprising.
Blowing off steam.
Yes.
Yeah, maybe blowing off steam.
There's something.
Something's being off-gassed or vented.
Oh, and there's a surprise.
There's a bonus episode tucked into it.
Yes, that's right.
That's right.
Wow.
Okay.
That might be promising too much.
A whole bonus episode.
But yes, or maybe.
We'll take it out.
No, it really is.
No, no, no, no.
Leave it in.
Well, bonus in quotes.
I thought that was understood.
I'm going to wrap this up.
But again, I want to thank my intrepid team, Mike Sweeney.
This is where I hold up a sign with my name on it.
Jose Arroyo.
Close enough.
Jose Arroyo and Jesse Gaskell.
And I want to tell you that if you...
This Mac show is out now, the third episode, Kona by Moscow, Austria.
And if you would like to be considered to be one of the fans that I visit anywhere in the world, it's pretty simple to reach out to us.
Just go to teamcoco.com slash apply.
Once again, that's teamcoco.com slash apply.
And maybe I'll come visit you Wherever you are on this spinning blue lonely globe called Earth.
So get ready.
I mean, you should wake up every day assuming Conan might show up at your door.
Dress camera ready.
Yes, exactly.
I had a beautiful ending that ended with the image of the Earth spinning in the black void.
Oh, sorry.
And then you guys came in with that stuff.
We could end it there.
No, I just want to say that I appreciate the work that you guys have done for this show.
As just microscopic inhabitants of this tiny blue spherical speck that drifts alone in an inky void.
Are we alone?
Are we not?
We'll never know.
But we call this place Earth.
I know you want to say something sweet.
Go for it.
You have to do it.
Go for it.
You had one more thing to add, gas station.
Yes, I knew it!
Conan O'Brien needs a fan.
With Conan O'Brien, Sonam Ovsessian, and Matt Gourley.
Produced by me, Matt Gourley.
Executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross, and Nick Liao.
Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.
Take it away, Jimmy.
Supervising Producer, Aaron Blair.
Associate Talent Producer, Jennifer Samples.
Associate Producers, Sean Doherty and Lisa Berm.
Engineering by Eduardo Perez.
Get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at SiriusXM.com slash Conan.
Please rate, review, and subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Fan wherever fine podcasts are done.
