Hey weirdos, before we unleash today's macabre mystery, we were wondering, have you ever heard of Wondery Plus?
It's like a secret passage to an ad free layer with early access to episodes.
You can join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or an Apple podcast or Spotify.
You're listening to a morbid network podcast.
Listening on Audible helps your imagination soar.
Whether you listen to stories, motivation, expert advice, any genre you love, You can be inspired to imagine new worlds, new possibilities and new ways of thinking.
Listening can lead to positive changes in your mood, your habits, and ultimately your overall well-being.
Audible has an incredible selection of over 1 million audiobooks, podcasts, and Audible Originals all in one easy app.
Find the genres you love and discover new ones.
Explore bestsellers like my sister's title. new releases, plus thousands of included audiobooks, podcasts, and originals that members can listen to all they want with more added all the time.
I have been listening to the Martha's Vineyard Beach and Book Club, which actually Elena recommended to me.
She did not listen to it, but she said, girl, this title sounds so you.
And let me tell you, it did. I've been listening to it while I walk, and I am absolutely loving it.
I love all the I love Audible. There's more to imagine when you listen.
Sign up for a free 30-day Audible trial and your first audiobook is free.
Visit audible.com slash morbid. When it comes to hiring great talent, Indeed is all business needs.
Their sponsored job feature puts postings at the top of search results. helping employers reach ideal candidates faster with 45% more applications than non-sponsored jobs.
According to Indeed data, businesses can build their dream team without delay. no monthly subscriptions or long-term contracts employers only pay for results Every minute, 23 people are hired through Indeed worldwide.
Speed up hiring today with a $75 sponsored job credit. at Indeed.com slash WonderyUS.
Just mention hearing about Indeed on this podcast.
Terms and conditions apply. Hiring? Indeed is all you need.
Hey guys, Caleb from Horror Soup here, and I am delivering this message both to the Morbid and the Horror Soup feed simultaneously, so bear with me.
But if you guys already know me, then, you know, you're fine.
You're good. But if you don't know me, like I said a second ago, I'm from a podcast called Horror Soup.
And I am starting or I've already started a podcast Scream, which is a horror movie podcast that I host with Elena from...
Well, you know where she's from. She's from here.
She's from Morbid. She is from True Crime. and she's good at what she does, but now she's venturing into some other stuff.
And we're going to be talking about horror movies every single week on Sunday starting today.
So if you want to listen to the show, you can go ahead and...
Well, first off, you can keep listening to this episode if you want to just listen to it here.
But if you want to go and listen to the other two episodes that are out right now...
Go and search Scream, that is S-C-R-E-A-M with an exclamation point and your podcast player.
And you'll see a nice little colorful art piece, a little piece of art.
And that's going to be me. And Elena right on top of that.
And that is our show. So go check it out right now.
It's available everywhere. It's going to be coming out every single week. from now on and uh Really just, we're really excited to be announcing this.
Our music is done by Ethan Hurt from Class of Newcomb High.
That is the music creator of Class of Newcomb High, to be specific.
And our artwork is done by Casey Booth, a really talented horror artist, and both just great people.
Really glad that this is happening, and I hope that you guys enjoy the show as much as we do.
So, thank you. Screaming to pod fans. The fans of the game.
We'll be right back. We'll be right back.
¶¶ If you enjoyed that song that was beautifully composed just for us by Ethan Hurt, go ahead and check out his website at www.ethanhurt.com and if you don't know who than her it is.
Come on, dude. Troma, class of Newcomb High, what's going on?
What are you doing here if you don't know Ethan Hurt?
Get on it, guys. Get on it. Get with it.
And in case you don't know, and you probably don't, I'm Elena.
Yeah. And I guess that would make me Caleb.
I think I'm the other part to this. He's the other half.
Two halves make a whole. And this is our new podcast. scream scream and you have to you have to say it like that because there's an exclamation point at the end We're exclamatory.
We're excited. What's going on? A lot is going on.
That's what that exclamation point means.
I like that. So I think pretty much what we're doing here is that We are covering horror movies, just all horror movies I'm sure, you know, based off the music and the artwork, you might think, oh, hey, 80s horror movies podcast.
Yeah, no, it's fucking not. Get over it.
We're moving on from that now because we're going week to week.
Yes. So Anal Fissure is going to be covering a movie and narrating a movie one week.
It's going to be her pick entirely. And then the next week...
Me, the canals, the canals of the anal cavity.
We'll be narrating and picking a movie the next week.
And Elena kind of comes from a background of...
Very witchy 2000s movies. That's what I'm going to go ahead and say.
Yeah, I love witchy 2000s movies. I'm very trash 80s, like disgusting, grotesque stuff. which I can definitely get down with, but you have such an array.
You're going to expose me to things I'm sure I'm going to be very upset about being exposed to.
Look, Elena, you're gonna be upset emotionally, Physically sometimes you might need to vomit a few times depending on how far we get into this and what I do because the thing is you Right off the bat, right off the fucking bat, Elena just drops...
The worst movie ever. First, she tried to do another one.
I'm not going to mention it because we'll probably do it later.
But she drops a movie that I was worried about.
Really, really worried about. And then it turned out to be really good.
And I was like, oh shit, I actually like this.
And then all of a sudden she's like, oh wait, hold on, let's change it. to the worst piece of trash that you've ever seen in your life that you're never going to watch again, that you had a terrible time watching.
Yep. And I knew it. Like I knew it. That other movie we're definitely going to cover because that other movie is like legendary.
But this one, I was like, oh, Caleb's going to hate this one.
And I do. You're very right. You weren't wrong about that.
I knew it. But there's a really... The really weird thing is that, first of all, the movie Secret Window from 2004, if you're wondering.
Johnny Depp, terrible. The thing is... You are the only person in the world that likes it.
You know what? It's lonely on this island, but I feel okay about it.
I know some people are going to message and be like, I loved it.
And I'm going to be like, yeah, there you are.
I knew you were in there. And we'll high five over the internet.
Elena. It's gonna happen. I'm telling you.
There's all these secret, secret window heads.
That are just going to come floating out of the atmosphere after this.
You know this is based off of a very short novella, right?
Oh, yeah. Oh, I know. It's in that book.
He has a book. I think it's called Two Past Midnight.
I think it is. Stephen King. I don't know what that is.
You're the reader here. I mean, we know that Stephen King adaptations, like, they're not killing it. they're not they're not killing it i think this is one of the better ones though is it I feel like it is.
No. No, it's not. That was a rhetorical question.
That wasn't me asking you, like, is it? Go ahead and defend yourself.
That was me saying no. Answer me. It's not.
The answer to that question is no. It's one of the worst.
But, you know, it changes a lot of the novella.
Because it's 15 minutes. You have to just push a bunch of bullshit with this guy, David Kiyop or Coep, whatever.
First of all, I hate... Is it Kep? Probably.
I hate how he looks. I think it's Kep. I hate every fucking... bit of him yeah David Koepp is the director and he has personally hurt Caleb Like a real way people are gonna fucking mention be like he worked on Jurassic Park.
He had ties with Spider-Man, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, I'll give you that. That's a good movie.
I don't fucking care. He made the worst thing in the fucking world.
Well, and the problem with this, and we'll get into it, I'm sure, is that he's...
This is one... I feel like he took the opportunity with this movie to, like, show off all his cool film... like, film class tricks that he learned in film school.
He was like, look at this neat shot. I can shoot for no reason.
But you know what? I don't know. He wrote Spider-Man, the original Tobey Maguire's Spider-Man in 2002, two years before this.
That's impressive. Yeah, but it's like, you know, wouldn't you think that like, you know, maybe he'd look at some things Sam Raimi does and go like, hey, that's a good director.
Maybe I'll use some of that. But no. He was like, I'm gonna do my own thing.
And it's gonna be great. And Caleb is gonna hate it.
The thing is, I think this guy might be a kind of decent writer in some things.
But if you look at the things he's directed, you don't care.
Yeah, it's true. I don't fucking care. It's really... You know what he directed?
What did he direct? He directed that fucking movie with Kevin Bacon and Amanda Seyfried that I dropped for you.
Oh, the new one. You should have left. That's him.
Oh shit really? Uh oh. So I already know that I don't want to watch that now.
I already knew I didn't want to watch it.
But this was 2004. So maybe he's grown. He's grown.
I don't know, man. By 2020. You're gonna have to vet that for me, and I'm still not gonna believe you after this.
I'll bet it for you because I love Kevin Bacon.
So I will absolutely bet that for you just to watch Kevin Bacon. anyone who wants to listen to my other show, Whore Soup, you'll see immediately that, um...
I don't like Kevin Bacon. There's like five different episodes where I express my hatred for Kevin Bacon and his wrinkly fucking body.
So the fighting continues because I love Kevin Bacon.
And you know, I have this ongoing argument that no one thinks Kevin Bacon is attractive.
And I know you fall in that category of the three people that do.
You know what it is? He's, it was from like Apollo 13 days.
He looks like a fucking raisin. Yeah, I could see that.
It's from the Apollo 13 days. When like him and Tom Hanks and like...
Who else was in that? Bill Paxton. And at the time watching it, I was like, what, like 10?
And at the time I was like, yeah, okay, why are they in this?
Like, whatever, they're just astronauts.
But now as like a 30 something year old, I looked at Apollo 13 recently and I was like, what babes in this movie?
Oh, look at this beautiful raisin-bodied man with a pig face.
Oh... I'm saying, Kevin Bacon, footloose.
That's all I'm saying. Loose. Get on it.
Footloose. Kick up your bacon nose. Oh, geez.
Louise. And then no one knows the rest of that song.
So maybe we should talk about this $40 million movie. that barely made $92 million, which I know you might hear that and be like, oh, it made $92 million.
This is a $40 fucking million movie. Yeah.
I know. Oh, you want to talk about the Columbia Pictures thing?
Oh, yeah. Do you want to talk about that?
Because I'm positive that when this came out, And they saw how much this made.
They were like, hey, so Keop or Kep, whatever your name is.
I don't even know your name because you're an idiot.
You made a movie with Stephen King's name on it.
Johnny Depp was the lead actor. and you barely made double of the $40 million budget.
You like barely got back what you spent.
Yeah, you went a little over and who knows if advertising is a part of that budget.
I really hope it is. I fucking hope it is.
It has to be. It truly has to be. So Elena, this is your pick.
You're going to be narrating this and I am going to stop you a good amount of times because I actually, I have...
My own notes, but I think I'm going to ignore those more than anything for my notes specifically on what David Kiyop says about this movie.
I'm going to... You're going to be talking about scenes, and I'm going to be breaking down what David, what he thinks is happening in the movie.
I kind of love that. I'm down for that. You're just going to break in and yell about David Kiyop Cap Coop.
Kebab, who knows? Yeah. Well, Rotten Tomatoes kind of agrees with you because it has a 46%.
It has a 6.6 on IMDb, which I think is too high for IMDb.
I think it should have like a 3. I'm impressed by that, actually.
It's weird. I don't know. They're on some weird shit sometimes.
To be honest, I was actually surprised at the 46% because I thought it might be lower because I know a lot of people did not like this movie.
But like 46, that's, you know, we'll take it.
Look, here's the weirdest thing. I'm telling you guys, just watch the making of the director's thing on YouTube.
It's like an hour-ish long. You're gonna hate it, but like, Johnny Depp is in it for like five minutes everyone like fucking I think I think Hutton was in it for like two minutes and Yep.
Like, they're not in there really. It's just this director just talking about what he thinks the movie is for an hour.
And I have this really... strong theory in my eyes that he was just watching the movie on mute in front of him and he was just going scene by scene because he couldn't even remember the movie because nothing happened in it.
It kind of makes sense. I'm going to be honest.
As much as nothing happens, I still love this movie.
I don't know what, I can't hate it. I can't hate it.
I can't do it. I want to hate it for you, but I can't.
Well, I can't agree, but you know what? We're riffing a lot.
I can go on forever just about how I hate this movie, but I guess let's get into the actual movie now.
All right, we'll get into this. So I think maybe one of the reasons why I love this movie is because it's I mean, it's what Stephen King does.
It's he writes. movies about writing like about writers writing and the process of writing so I think seeing it and seeing Johnny Depp as Morton Ramey this like super weird eccentric super ticky, like super successful writer.
Okay, I'm gonna cut you off immediately.
What is it? Is it Morton Rainey? It's two things.
It's two things that you just said. Morton, Johnny Depp does not know how to be a human.
He's not a person. He's not acting like a writer or anything, like an eccentric writer.
He's acting like... Johnny Depp. He's acting like a fucking pirate.
Yeah. He was still in Jack Sparrow mode.
Yeah, he didn't know how to get out of that mode, and he's just Jack Sparrow the whole fucking time, but human version.
And then the fucking, what did you say about the direction or something a second ago?
Oh, cause Stephen King writes about like writing.
Yeah, so Stephen King writes about writing.
David Kiyop literally was like... Hey, so, you know, looking at a movie about a guy just writing, that's boring, but I think we found a way to make it fun and exciting.
And no, he didn't. Okay, go on. That's what I had to say.
He made it a cinematic adventure, is what he made it.
Speaking of Pirates of the Caribbean, they released this movie a little early just to like ride off that.
Pirates of the Caribbean vibe. Because they knew Johnny Depp.
Everybody was all about him at the time.
They wanted to bank on that. Doesn't sound like it worked really well.
But, you know... A for effort, guys. You tried.
And it's another isolation setting that Stephen King loves like you know The Shining Misery Pet Sematary Yeah, exactly.
So the first scene, and this kind of goes with what we were talking about earlier, the first scene is Johnny Depp as, like we said, Morton Rainey.
And he's in a car. It's like snowing wildly.
And he's telling himself, like, turn the car around.
He's clearly upset. And you're like, what the fuck's going on?
Prominently displaying a wedding ring. So you know shit's about to go down with a marriage.
It's just like, boom, right in the camera.
Which I will give you that directional wise.
That's just like, hey, look, he's married.
Something's going to happen with his marriage immediately.
David Kiyop says something specifically about that in the making of.
Yeah, he breaks down that scene, and this is the breakdown of it.
I didn't even see that, and I knew it. I'm going to do it in his voice.
Please do. So I wanted it to be snowing and windy and cold.
I wanted it to snap on the screen. No. Cut in.
No pan. I wanted you to think, oh. Who's he?
He seems upset. What is he doing? Why is he in that car?
Where is he going? Oh, why is he stopped now?
I wanted it to say, this is our guy. This is him.
Pay attention. I wanted the movie to snap onto the screen. to cut on, not fade up, just a guy's face and have him looking right into the camera. and just wonder, oh, who's he?
He seems upset. What is he doing? Why is he sitting in that car?
Now he's going backwards. Why is he doing that?
Now he's stopped again. What's with this guy?
I wanted to really draw you in with a lot of questions.
And me on my side, what the fuck are you talking about?
You know what? Those are just things. Those are just, I'm not thinking, oh, who is this guy?
What? Oh, oh. What? What? Are you kidding?
He's in a car. He's looking at me. Those thoughts aren't going through my head.
What went through my head in that beginning scene is...
This guy's a fucking moron. I already know that you're my main character.
You don't need to show me this guy just sitting here and go, oh yeah, I need you to think.
This is the main character. I already fucking know that.
He's the first person on screen and he's Johnny Depp.
It's like he's not, like we're not doing like a scream Drew Barrymore and then like kill her off right away kind of thing.
No. No, you didn't look at it and go, this is our guy.
That's what I did. I was like, oh, this is our guy.
That's immediately what I thought. I don't know about you.
God, Elena. This is awesome. This is awesome.
I'm gonna break ya I was thinking at first that I was like I can't show her these really fucked up movies cause she's gonna quit she's gonna leave I think I need to I need to go there.
We're doing a Serbian film next week. Oh shit.
I'm done. Absolutely not, sir. We're doing a Serbian film.
We're doing 120 Days of Sodom. Oh no. Oh god.
I had no idea that secret window would take me to these places.
You sent me a text. Okay, guys, guys, Elena sent me a text that was like...
Oh, I didn't know that Johnny Depp was going to break you.
And you know what I said? I said, I fucking did.
I did. Like, you know who knew that? Me.
If you told me at any time, hey, what? What horror movie would break you?
I would say a movie with Johnny Depp or Kevin Bacon.
And I just didn't know that. It was just kismet.
And now here we are. And here we are. Here we are.
Well, well. You know, our guy who we've established is both of our guys.
Johnny Depp, Morton Rainey. The man himself.
He's in the car. Like, you know, David Kabob said, is all the snows going everywhere?
Morton Rainey. Rainey. Do you know what that's based off of?
Morton Salt, right? Because there is a girl with an umbrella on the Fucking Morton Salt.
Morton Rainey. And he also purchases Morton Salt later, just to be like, ba-boop-bop. at the store, it's one of like four things he purchases.
He does. It's true. Well, he ends up, he's in the car.
He's telling himself to like turn around.
He's clearly upset. You know, shit's about to go down. and he squeals the car around.
He's about to leave, he doesn't leave. gets out of the car, goes in this like creepy motel and he just, nobody's at the desk.
So he just grabs the keys off the wall. Which I was like, first of all, how do you know which keys you're supposed to get?
But I guess maybe he like creeped and found it out.
We've all done that. That was one thing that the director did right.
He was like, maybe I don't need to show him getting these keys in real time.
But then he screws it up every other time in the movie.
So, you know, it's fun. So we'll take that.
We'll take it. Well, he storms in, he grabs it.
Gets back in the car and he drives up to this room in the corner of the motel.
He like. shines his headlights on the door.
We watch from inside the car as he goes in the hotel room.
And he barges in. And boom, there's his, what we know now is his wife.
Amy, played by Maria Bello, also in Coyote Ugly, just saying.
And she's in bed with a dude who is Timothy Hutton.
We later find out his name is Ted. Of course his name is Ted.
Dumb name. Everybody, yeah, you have to have a Ted.
Well, and they have clearly fooked. And this is clearly Morton Rainey's wife, so that's no good.
But one thing I did love was that they just have him scream in their faces.
Like, he just leans over and screams. in their faces.
You want some on that? I do because I loved that because I was like that's real.
Like I would have done that. I would have just screamed in their faces.
You just ruined my whole point, but I'm still going to tell you what it was because I was going to argue against that.
I was already on the other side of that.
This is amazing. Kebab is like, hey, so I have this big thing about Johnny Depp's screaming scene.
He's like... Yeah, it has to do with Mario Bello and Timothy Hutton, or Maria, what was her name?
Maria Bello. maria bella maria bella mario bella mario bella she sucks um He's like, hey, you know, it's them in a dark room for 20 minutes waiting for Johnny to come inside and do this stupid fucking scream.
And he's like, but you know what? That wasn't me.
That was Johnny's idea. He wanted to come in and he said, quote, unquote...
I wanted to use my voice as a weapon. Oh, no.
That's not what I want. Oh, good. Thank you.
I didn't want that. I hated that. We do put a little bit extra with his scream, because that was Johnny's idea.
He wanted to... He understood I didn't want to hear any dialogue, and he said, I feel like I want to just go up to the bed and scream at them, sort of like using voice as weapon.
And it seemed like a great idea, so he did it.
No, once I hear that, I hate it, because I was just thinking it as I would just be so Like I can understand being so insane that you're just like, I'm so angry right now.
All I can do is just scream like animalistically at you.
He was fighting them with his ah. No, hate that.
Hate that a lot. And they edited his scream, too.
Did you notice that? They put reverb and shit on it, so it's like...
It's like... It's like crazy. Yep. And then we find out later that he actually... didn't use his voice as a weapon.
He held a gun at them. Wait, he did? Yeah, later in the movie.
Is that like the reveal later? Yeah, and we'll see later it's going to all reveal.
You see that he actually was pointing a gun at them, so...
So he did not use his voice as a weapon, Johnny.
I do like the score of this movie, though.
I always love in a horror movie or like a thriller when there's that like womp sound that comes.
I always like a good, like... Yeah, I like the whomps.
I like that really, like, chaotic... cacophony of sounds just coming at you.
Yeah, just Johnny Depp screaming over and over again.
That should have been the score. Exactly.
It really should have. Well, so then we just end there.
You're just like, whoop. And then it's this nice shot of like, you know, the opening titles, the secret window titles.
And we go to a cabin on a lake. And we pan into a secret window.
Crazy. Did I mention the tagline? No, you didn't.
The tagline is, some windows should never be opened. that's just a statement sure is it's not a tagline like you know what Some windows are secret.
No, that's ridiculous. We should call it secret windows.
I think that that was like their original title and they were like, we can't name it that.
Yeah, they were like, that's too long. So let's just, let's use it as the tagline and really draw people in.
Made me want to see it. I was like, really?
Did you watch this in theaters? I feel like you watched this in theaters.
I did see this in theaters. You did? I did.
That's unfortunate. It really is. That would have been a movie that I asked for my money back on.
I would have left. I walked out of it and I was like, what a masterpiece.
I'm into it. I would have left 15 minutes in.
I would have been like, hey, this was the ending.
Whoever I'm with, you can stay and watch it.
Tell me if I'm right. And they would have walked out.
They would have been like. Yeah, you're right.
I loved it. But you know what? I asked John, my husband, I was like, do you remember watching this movie with me?
He did not remember one second of this movie.
Why? quite an impact on him, as you can tell.
He was like, no, I did not see this movie.
I was like, you did. Good. Thank God. Cool.
Super glad it marked itself in your soul.
So we scan right through the secret window, which will become important later.
Like a little secret window in this cabin on the lake.
And we're going in. We got like the dog sleeping in the corner.
There's a desk with a laptop open. And it's the beginning of a novel.
So he's writing a novel in a cabin on a lake like we all do. and the novel says on the screen, you can see the beginning of it, and it says, four days after George had confirmed to his own satisfaction that his wife was cheating on him, he confronted her.
I have to talk to you, Abby, he said. I...
And then nothing else. So as you can tell, he's definitely super creative and he's not drawing from his own experience at all.
And then we pan down to Mort Rainey. the couch asleep downstairs wearing the most tattered fucking bathrobe you've ever seen in existence.
He looks a fucking hot mess. And it says it's six months later.
So immediately you're like, boom, six months later.
Ooh, I couldn't have figured that out. Couldn't have figured out that some time had passed.
Some amount of time has passed. And this shot is interesting because this shot We see after the camera goes through a mirror, like you go through the mirror and you see him in the mirror sleeping.
And then you pass through the mirror and suddenly you're like in the shot.
And apparently the director, Kebab there, said that this was supposed to symbolize going into Mort's mind and now being... super reliable on like you have to rely on him now as the narrator Then that's why you see the person that you see next.
Look, Elena. Because we're in his mind now.
I'm so glad that you mentioned that. I am.
I'm really glad because... Because... Alright, so... Because it's genius?
Kebab really takes the role of Richard Kelly after Donnie Darko, but the only difference is that Donnie Darko is a good... entertaining movie.
I love Donnie Darko. I will say that Richard Kelly is kind of ridiculous and my friend did point this out to me it was like hey this guy's just explaining all this stuff after the fact to make his movie make sense and i was like you know what you're kind of right But it's still a good movie and even if it doesn't make sense, it's still a good movie.
This, however, is not. And this guy is doing the Richard Kelly and he's trying to explain everything.
After the fact. And there's no fucking way that when he did this mirror shot, he was thinking, oh, yeah.
Now you're in Mart's mind. But I kind of love it after the fact.
I don't. Because then later, and we'll see it later, you go through the mirror again and suddenly you're in reality and that's why you can't see. the things that you see before yeah I just love things that I would watch in a movie theater that would have no relevance to me by the time I left the movie theater.
I love that stuff, you know? I really...
Well, that's the other thing. It's like, yeah, totally cool.
Like not one person. in the history of the world would ever look at that and be like, you know what, I bet that is.
That's exactly that. So in that vein, that's very ineffective.
In that vein, if you have to explain it later in a making of to get people to understand it, then it's really not a good way to do it.
No, it's not. I'll concede on that one. Okay.
So let's get into John Shooter. Yes, so now we get John Shooter.
And he's played by John Tutoro, and I think he's great. in this movie.
I will say that John Totaro is pretty fucking awesome.
He is. He's a great fucking actor. I think he's...
I think this is the worst role in the world.
And I'm so upset that he had to be on this.
I think he just saw Johnny Depp's name and he was like, Oh, Oh yeah, sure, cool, he's a big dude.
He was like, let's do this. Yeah, let's do that.
Fucked over, dude. That hat that they put on him, and they say they spent so much time picking the hat, they were like, it has to look good. good, like kind of unreal, but not too unreal.
And it's like, dude, that looked unreal the whole time.
The first fucking time I saw this guy, I'm going to spoil the movie right now.
Nothing that happens in this movie is real.
I don't fucking care about any of this. And immediately when I see him, when I see fucking Shooter, I go...
This guy's not real. No one is around when this guy's here.
No one's seeing him except for Johnny Depp.
It is in his head. I predicted this movie 10 minutes in.
Just because of the hat. I'm not kidding.
Elena, I'm not lying to you. This is not a bit.
This is not me saying like, oh, this hat is so ridiculous.
I was just like, oh, there you go. No, legitimately, I saw that hat and I said...
This is not a real guy. There's no way this is real.
No one saw that man walk down the street in that hat.
You're telling me this guy's just driving around and shit and no one knows where he is.
And, and everyone's saying like, this guy doesn't exist.
So yeah, he doesn't fucking exist. I never second guessed.
The hat is a huge part of things too. It is.
They really focus on that. It's not like they put that hat there and were like, yeah, that's fine, you can forget about that hat.
No, they were like, Bitch, don't forget about this hat.
And at one point he's like, I want my hat.
Like, he says it again. It's a story arc.
He uses his hat, and it's like, bring me back my hat.
Well, when he shows up initially, he wakes Mort up from his slumber on the couch.
And he's like, you stole my story. like that's like one of the first things he says and Mort's like um Excuse me, what?
Like, I don't know who you are, what? And he insists that he had written a story. and that Mort Rainey stole it.
They go back and forth, and he tries to hand them this, like, thick-ass manuscript, and he's like, here you go, read my manuscript.
And he's like, no, no, I'm not touching that shit.
Yeah, he just throws it away. Yeah, and the guy's like, we're gonna settle this shit.
And he's like, yeah, no, okay, it's settled, bye.
And he just shuts the door. And then you hear some shit happening on the porch.
And... What he did was his name's John Shooter and he left the manuscript under this rock on the porch.
And the fucking maid gets it. And he is so mean to his housekeeper.
He is so shitty to his maid. He's literally just like, oh, yeah, fuck you.
Why are you doing this and that and blah, blah, blah.
Get out of my face. Because he tosses the manuscript in the trash and then just goes and like has a nap again.
Well, she's also really weird because... She's a little strange.
She's digging in the trash and she's like, oh yeah, I saw this thing that you wrote that's in the trash.
Okay, if it was his and he threw it away, he probably doesn't fucking want it.
He probably threw it away for a reason. You don't just accidentally throw it away. entire script well that's the thing because he goes what he goes and has a nap he like tries to write again he like plays with a slinky his hair is like super upsetting and then he walks downstairs and the manuscript is on the table did you just move past that slinky thing casually Just the slinky.
Just, you know, he plays with a slinky. He was just sitting in front.
That's what you do when you have rhinos block.
You sit in front of your laptop and you use slinky.
You just use the slinky. That's all you do.
That's what I do. Whenever I write, I pull out my slinky and just slink. back and forth just do it and it gets creative juices flowing Is that why you like this movie, just because of the slinky?
That's it. God damn it. I felt very connected to it.
I was like, we are one. He understands me.
Well, he goes downstairs after slinking a little bit.
The manuscript is on the table, and like we said, he had thrown it away.
So his housekeeper's like, oh, hey, I found that in the trash.
I thought it was one of yours. And again, I agree.
Oh, and he's so pissed. He's like, my name is not...
John Shooter. Do you think my fucking name is John Shooter?
Do I look like a shooter? And by the way, she's like a sweet elderly woman.
I was like... You need to calm down. And then she's like, oh, I thought you were using one of those pseudonyms or pen names.
And he's like, no, I never have. I've never done that.
And she's like, okay, like, chill. And he mimes shooting her in the head when she turns around.
He does, yeah, he does. And I was like, Walmart, like, calm down.
And there's also, that's like a theme through this movie.
He mimes killing people a lot. Look, when you're Johnny Depp, everyone around you is a fucking cunt and you just have to mimic shooting all of them.
Apparently. That was serious. I was like, she did not warrant that kind of treatment. reaction she was just trying to help you out bro like more chill And he does it later too.
And then he starts like reading it because of course.
And he's looking at it and he's like, huh, this sounds like really familiar.
And it's like, yeah, you plagiarized, motherfucker.
I know it. And he goes and gets the book out of his shelf because he has all his books on a shelf, of course.
I mean, I would too if I was published, but whatever. that was just gonna be a dick about it but he gets the book out also the author photo like of him in that book, is the most ridiculous author photo I've ever seen.
He looks ridiculous. I don't even remember it.
I'm not going to lie. It's so fake. Like looking at it, I was like, that's so fake.
I don't even know if that's Johnny Depp.
It could be someone else. I'm not even sure.
But it's like a collection of short stories a la Stephen King.
It's really not hard to be a Johnny Depp double.
I could be a Johnny Depp double if I tried a little bit. especially you really could especially in this movie too if you could like make your hair crazy like that yeah oh cause he refused to cut his fucking hair for this movie He did, yeah.
I kind of love that though, because his hair gets really aggressive at one point.
It assaults you at one point, and I kind of love that.
But he finds the story is called Secret Window. you know bada boop and it's story I think it was story number eight he goes through it he's comparing it line by line and it's exactly the same phrase like it's there's maybe like one or two words that are different it's just the ending that's different because that's the only thing.
Shitter's pissed off because he fucked up the ending.
He's like, this is my story. This is my ending and you fucked up my ending and now I'm gonna kill you.
I'm going to shoot you. You have three days to find that magazine.
I'll give you three days. You call your ex and get her to send you the magazine with your story in it, if there is such a magazine.
I love his accent so much. Well, and this story, weirdly enough, is about a woman loving her garden. more than she loved this man and the story, and he's planning to kill her and bury her in her secret garden.
So he's comparing the stories and as he's doing that, there's like this flashback. there's like this flashback and it's him in that cabin and it's his wife now ex-wife amy And she's up there with him and she like moves and she's wearing the robe.
The robe that he's wearing, it was her robe.
Now you're like, oh, there's that. Wearing it all the time.
And he wears it all. The fucking time in this movie.
I hate that robe so much. Like, I understand because we all have a robe like that, but like, stop. just stop don't wear it all the time and it's ripped sold my robe You sold your robe?
I sold it. I sold it. It's gone. You didn't just give it away?
You sold it? I sold it. Got like 13 bucks.
Sold that shit. He could have given this robe away.
He should have sold his status as an actor after this movie.
Wow. Shots fired. I'm fucking saying it.
Shots fired. Johnny Depp, you're not invited on the show no matter what Elena says.
Oh, no. I need to say. Cut. Well, either way, he's in this fucking robe.
But it's her robe. And we're seeing it in the flashback.
And she's moving shit and then she's like, oh, look.
And she goes, a secret window over a secret garden.
Because she's looking out that little secret window that we came in through.
Whatever. And so already... You're like, you're going to die and end up in that garden, honey.
Yeah, immediately. Like, already. Already.
I was like, well, that's going to happen, so...
Spoiler alert. So he sees that the stories are the same and he's like, oh shit.
So at this point he started, this is when we start seeing him like take out cigarettes. and like smoke them, but then he tells everybody he doesn't smoke.
Another huge tell, because the first time you see John Shooter smoking, He pulls out the same.
Not the same. No, no, no. Not the same cigarette.
It's the same pack. Oh, you're right. It is the same exact brand of cigarettes.
Not only that, it has the top ripped off and there's one cigarette in it.
It is the same exact pack of cigarettes Oh, you are correct I didn't even think of that Yeah, that's another big tell I was like, dude, it's his box of cigarettes.
It's the one that we've, because we've already seen his like three times and you see John Shooter pull it out.
He's like, hey, you want a cigarette? And then, yeah, it is fucking his.
It is, you're right. I didn't even think of that.
You texted me. You fucking texted me too when I first started it because 20 minutes in I was like, I hate this.
This is stupid. And you were like... Oh no, there's a real big twist in there.
I really believed that. You did? In my heart of hearts, I believed that.
I still believe it. Never mind. I was just going to ask you if you told me that before you rewatched the movie, but apparently you still believe it.
So never mind. I did. I believe it now.
Cool. That was after I had rewatched it.
I was like, just wait for that twist, man.
It's going to blow your socks off. Very cool.
He's like, cool, cool, cool. Well, and this is when he, like, smokes a cigarette and then his housekeeper comes up, the sweet old lady that he just mimed shooting... her fucking brains out in the kitchen.
And she comes up and she just is, she's like, all right, I'm going to leave.
But she tells him, she does this whole spiel where she's like, some women, they don't know a good thing when they got it. some women don't know they got the whole world and it's right in front of their nose and then she goes that's it not another word And she goes to walk downstairs and again he's like, fuck you, I hate you.
Like, he's so mean to her. And I was like, she's just telling you that she's sorry your wife cheated on you and she thinks you're wonderful.
Why are you being so mean, Mort? Like I said, we're just living in Johnny Depp's world.
We are, because it doesn't make any sense.
And then I loved it, though, because she's like, you're a good man, Mr. Rainey.
And then he replies, you too, Mrs. Garvey.
And I loved that. I was like, okay, I love that.
But so again, he takes one of about a zillion naps again.
He's always napping on that couch. He's mumbling and just being a dick and he's freaking out about the stories.
Like I didn't steal it. I know I didn't steal it.
He's freaking out. falls asleep, of course has a dream about John Shooter because now he's gonna be paranoid as fuck.
This is... I'm going to spoil it. This is the dog, right?
This? No, this isn't the dog yet. We're not there yet?
God, how are we talking about this this much?
I know. It's hard not to. There is a dog, though, so you know the dog's going to get it.
Anytime there's a dog in these movies, you're like, oh, no.
Which I hate, it's the worst part. So a phone call wakes him up.
Of course it's Amy, his ex-wife. She's just...
You know, pretending that she gives a shit.
And she's like, I thought something was wrong with you.
And he starts miming strangling her over the phone.
Oh, yeah. Immediately. Calm down. But she does mention in this phone call that he was influenced at times by Jack Daniels, so... you start to see that like okay like they had other problems in their marriage it's just kind of like setting up the whole like sometimes he drinks too much and So I think that's what's setting up later.
Like, is he crazy? Is he drunk? It's like, we don't know.
And she does mention the possibility that he once did plagiarize.
Yeah, she does. She does say... Like you didn't do this, right?
Like you did it before, motherfucker. Well, because they have this whole thing.
They're alluding to like, oh, the cops are doing it.
She's doing it. Everyone's doing it. Is this like last time?
Is this something we can handle? or is this and we're like what the fuck is they never say what last time was no I'd have no idea what they're talking about He just says at some point, like, you know, I took care of that and I never did it again.
And like, you didn't talk about it, right?
And she's like, no. But they mention it so many times that I needed to know what it was, because they mention it, what, seven times?
What do you mean influenced, anyway? Like my another story?
Look, forget it. Mort. You swore the one time was the only time.
Forget it, please. Please, just forget it.
Come on. And I just wanted to know more.
I was like, what, what did he do? Like, what did he plagiarize?
I need to know. And of course, that's the one thing that fucking kebab doesn't talk about.
Of course it is like he goes into everything else he goes into fucking mirrors and he doesn't go into this Johnny Depp's scream mirrors fucking the car shot.
Sorry. Like the fucking car. And there's another screaming moment at the end.
That's amazing. So then he's just walking around his property out of nowhere and he comes across John Shooter just hanging out on his property.
Yeah. It's just like, oh, hey. And he just goes, you read it?
And he's like, so they start talking about it and Shooter's like, I came all the way from Mississippi.
And I'm going to prove that you stole my story.
And while they're talking, a truck goes by.
Right? How does he know his address? And especially this cabin in the woods.
It's not even like his real home. Like what the fuck?
Like no one questions that. He left his house.
Yeah. He just like, he left his actual house where you could probably find him.
And this dude found him, but I didn't question it.
I was like, yeah, he came from Mississippi and he found him.
I'll tell you right now, everyone else questioned it.
I think everyone around me did, but I was like, I'm involved.
I suspended reality for this in a big way.
But while they're talking, a truck goes by and like the person beeps and waves and we find out later it's like this old dude, Tom.
That Mort knows. He plays like a role later.
That's why. So he waves to him. And then they start talking about it and Shooter says that he wrote his story seven years ago in 1997.
And he calls him a big money scribbling asshole.
And it was one of my favorite things ever.
Someday I hope to be called a big money scribble.
I don't. I will fight you. I strive. I strive for it.
Not you, Elena, but if anyone calls me that, I will fight you.
I'm going to fight you. Just the figurative you out there.
I will John Shooter you. I will find you. from Mississippi I'll come from Mississippi and find you in a big old hat And Mort says he wrote his in 1994.
So he's like, I beat you by years. And he says he published it in a magazine in June 1995.
It was a mystery magazine. Kep says something about that too.
He's like, oh, so Johnny Depp is like, oh yeah, my book was in 94, and then he's like...
You see Shooter have a weird face, and he's like, no, no.
And he's like he does that because if he actually did write his before his story, then he's not real.
Oh no. Yeah, this is the guy we're dealing with.
I'm really glad I didn't watch this making of because it would probably ruin a lot of things for me.
I watched it twice. I'm not going to lie.
I turned it off the second time. I didn't finish it.
I turned it the fuck off the second time.
I was pissed. It's true because Shooter flips out.
Like he flips out and calls him a liar. No way.
And he's like, you need to find the end.
So Morton Rainey is like, you need to find this magazine. like go find it and you'll see well and shooter is like how am i to do this You're a liar Mr. Rainey.
Wow, that was perfect. You're a liar. Put the emphasis on that.
Well, and he says... Am I to visit your wife, Amy?
Do I need to pay her a visit, Mr. Rainey? or are you going to get me that there magazine?
And then he creepily tells him that he read that on his book jacket.
And he does this like weird ass smile. He's like read it on your book jacket. and i was like gross i would immediately vacate the premises i'd be like all right He put his address on the jacket of his book?
Well, that's, I'm like, what? Yeah, why?
No one questions that either. I'm like, you didn't know where he lived off the book jacket, you idiot.
Like, what? And this is the time when he offers him a smoke and he pulls out the pack.
So that's the time that you were thinking of.
This is when he just gives him like the three days.
He tells him like, you need to go home. You need to give me the magazine, go home, get that.
So. This is when he goes home, he falls asleep, you see the dog go out the doggy door, and immediately you're like, well, that dog's gonna die.
Well, because he doesn't care. He just sees him go out and he's like, ah, whatever.
Chico? Kiko, don't be discouraged. All right, go ahead and be discouraged, you blind bastard.
See if I care. And the dog's name is Chico.
He's just like, yeah. Chico. Ah, you blind bastard.
It's an actual blind dog. It's so mean because he's really blind.
Yeah, he's actually blind. That's a for real blind dog that they had to like this.
He was like, oh yeah, he had to. I had the owner out there whistling for him, so that's why he kind of just turns around and comes back.
I'm like, you're talking to me about a fucking dog turning around and coming back? and going on a doggy door on your fucking making of?
That's what you're talking about? You're talking about that.
That is just a thing that he fucking did.
Of course a blind dog is gonna turn another way and then- And go wherever the sound is coming from.
You're so fucking stupid. I hate this guy.
I really do. Well, and he... It makes me sad because so Chico leaves and it's getting dark and Morton Rainey just goes to sleep on the couch.
He doesn't even care that his dog doesn't come in.
Out in the night in the forest. Yeah. It's true.
And he gets up. He goes outside because he doesn't see Chico when he wakes up, so he sees that the porch light is smashed.
And there's a note that says you have three days.
I am not joking. No police. It's like, whoa, all right.
So he goes over and there's a sheet on something.
Pulls the sheet back and there's a dead Chico with a screwdriver through his neck.
And he goes to the cops. Yeah, that's not cool.
And this cop is like... He's played by Charles S. Dutton.
His name is fucking Ken Karsh in the movie.
And he's like... Oh, sorry, he threatened your life?
And then Depp is like, well, he put a screw in my dog!
And the guy's like... Huh, doesn't seem that important, I guess.
Yeah, he's just like, meh. He must be a cat person.
Yeah. What? And he's like, yeah, go call someone else.
No one seems concerned about this at all.
No one cares. He's like, go call someone else.
This isn't my job. Yeah, like shit happens, I guess.
That sucks. He's like, call a vet. Call a vet.
I don't know what to tell you. I can't fix that for you.
He's dead. This is a Stephen King movie.
I know, but we are not pet cemetery. You're in the wrong film.
Yeah, wrong one, wrong one. Chico is gone, I hate to tell you.
Well, and so Ken agrees that he'll be his security.
And he's going to do like surveillance for him.
And so he was like, I also want to be there when you show Shooter the proof.
So Mort heads to Amy's house, which is his former house that she now owns.
And he pulls across the street, which is weird.
Like doesn't pull in the driveway and just like waits and then She and Ted, the dude that she was fookin' earlier, come walking out all dressed up.
They like kiss. And Ted is gesturing to the house like he's going to renovate something or something, which would go up my ass sideways, so I understand that.
Oh, yeah, well, because this guy is a fucking dick.
It's, like, it's legitimately another person's house.
He's a dick. He's acting like it's his, and it's not.
Like, I know you're dating this girl and she's living in it, but it's not your house.
But it's like, dude, that's not your... And Ted and Amy are very unlikable characters.
Like when they finally... They don't even like each other. no and when it finally reaches the end and something happens you're like i don't even hate that It's another movie where you don't care about the characters who died.
You don't root for them at all. You really don't.
I cared about Charles Dutton dying. Yeah, I cared about that.
I cared about that in a big way. Well, this is when he's sitting there and he watches them kiss and he says... to himself, this is not my beautiful house, this is not my beautiful wife anymore.
This is not my beautiful house. This is not my beautiful wife.
David Byrne talking heads. So, biggest... biggest issue.
I've said that a lot, but I'm gonna, yes, Number one biggest issue, because at first I texted you and I was like, you know what?
The only cool part of the movie. was him saying this is not my beautiful house this is not my beautiful wife and then when I watched the making of and everything else it just pissed me off more and more and when I like thought about it again, I was like, I don't like that.
And in the making of, they show him saying it again, and I listened to the way he said it, he's like, This is not my beautiful house.
This is not my beautiful wife. you just took one of my favorite songs from one of my favorite bands from one of my favorite people of all time.
Like David Byrd might've been a little weird with the whole like Tom Tom club thing and all that.
But he's a creative guy that, you know, he does what he does.
But, you know, beside that, I love David Byrne.
I love his music. And this made me so fucking angry.
And you love this film. So it's good that they came together.
It's good that it all came together for you.
I want to hurt myself just for having watched that.
Wow. I feel powerful that I did this. I really do.
I feel power like coursing through my veins right now that I've done this to you.
You were saying this might not be the first episode, and I think it has to be.
I feel like it must. It must be. We're setting the tone.
We're setting the tone right. Your partner on Morbid, because you are, I guess we haven't said that, You were also on Morbid Podcast with a very good friend, Ash.
I love Ash. With Ash. Ash has requested movies on Horsesuit before, and I've done it.
You guys did the craft together. fine with that that's fine and ash on her own was like you have to do ma And that was the worst piece of shit I've ever seen in my life.
Very much up there with this. I'd rather watch modern this.
She was really into that one. I would very much rather watch Ma than this, though.
I'm going to say you did. Wow. You fucked me over way worse.
I'm so happy. Way more. That's like a badge of honor.
A little bit. I feel pretty good about it.
Back to this shit movie. Do your thing. So back to this shit movie.
After he ruins the talking heads for you.
After he does that, he ends up going home without getting the magazine.
So we drove all the way there to do nothing but recite a Talking Heads song and then leave, apparently.
And he goes back and Ken is there. Ken says he's checked the place, but he makes him check it again.
And he's like, all right. He was like, I'm pretty sure that he was like, you know, you're going crazy, but I'm going to stay overnight.
Let me know if you need anything. Once he leaves, as soon as he leaves, he thinks he sees somebody in the house.
And it's like immediately. And he starts like smashing things.
He smashes a window, like a mirror. He smashes this mirror with a three second hesitation.
Yeah. like a three second hesitation and on like a five second count.
And then he automatically, he audibly says, huh?
I killed a mirror. I killed a mirror. And my shower door.
And it was a rat. It was a rat he saw. And it was a little mouse.
And he takes the little mouse outside, and guess who's outside?
John Shooter. As soon as Ken leaves, John Shooter's just there, always.
And John Schroeder says something like, sounds like you pitched a fit in there.
And then he's like, yeah, you stole my shit.
He just goes through the same thing. Every time he sees John Shooter, John Shooter says the same thing. shit just says it differently and more flowery i will say that it annoys the shit out of me It's funny, my note right here is, what the fuck is up with Shooter's voice and dialogue?
Exactly. There you go. Because I was getting annoyed.
I was like, all right, we get it. He stole your shit.
We know. He's going to give it to you. You want proof.
Yada, yada, yada. Yeah, because Deb is all like... Sorry, Deb is helping to play this out.
Deb is all like... No, no, this is my story.
And then Shooter goes, you know it isn't, Pilgrim.
I want my ending changed back to the original.
You know what you did. That's the end, Pilgrim.
That's how the story ends, pilgrims. And later, you hear Ken use the word pilgrim. when he's talking to, so it further puts in that he's just taking shit from people that are around him. to use as John Shooter's personality.
There's no way this cop would just be like, oh, hey, pilgrim.
The fuck? Yeah, it doesn't make any sense.
Well, the ending that he wants is that...
The ending that he wants says, I know I can do it, Ted Downey said, helping himself to another ear of corn from the steaming bowl.
I'm sure that in time, her death will be a mystery, even to me.
Which is a good ending. So... I have more.
He says... Oh, you do? Uh, you wanna wake up from one of your stupid naps and find Amy nailed to your neck? a garbage bin or turn on the radio some morning and here she came on on second best in a match with the chainsaw.
You keep out in the shed. Do ya? I think he says that later when they meet again, but yes.
I have it right here, so it was either right here or right after this.
It was very close. Such an escalation. Such an escalation.
I was like, you need to chill. Well, like you said a second ago, it doesn't matter what it was really because he says similar stuff all the time.
It's just like different witty Mississippi things.
Exactly. Mississippi things. He mentions Amy and he says, she's purdy.
Let's like stop it immediately. Stop it immediately, sir.
Stop. She's purdy. Like, that's not even a real thing.
Go away. Well, I say that. And you know what?
You're right. It was right then that he says you want to wake up from one of your stupid naps.
So... He ends up going back inside and he's freaking out.
By this point, his hair has become aggressive.
Like... Very aggressive. We have to watch him eating ASMR style.
Doritos, like old 2004 Doritos. The whole thing. movie he's eating Doritos.
I thought it was a Doritos advertisement.
I thought I was watching Mac and Me when you're seeing the fucking like McDonald's and Coke and Skittles everywhere.
You only see him eat Doritos. That's all you even see.
I'm pretty sure they sponsored this movie.
I think they did. And they said the old bag and everything.
It was kind of funny. He had apparently unplugged his phone at some point.
He plugs it back in. It rings immediately and it's Amy again.
Wait, he had a phone? He did. He had a phone.
How old was the phone? It was one of those, like, it actually looked like one of those, like, rotary phones.
Wait, so this was set in 2004? Yeah. I thought this was supposed to be set in an older time.
No. Okay. oh my god that's even dumber like i didn't buy i didn't buy that it was in an older time but it's even dumber that they weren't trying to Oh, my God.
Okay, cool. Wow, that just blew your mind.
I love that. Cool. Amy is on the phone and she's screaming that somebody burned down their house.
So he's like, oh shit. So he arrives and it is burnt down.
She was correct. Um, and they flash, they do a quick flashback to like them being cute or him being cute.
Like them living in the house and him like running after her as she's going to work and him pretending that like.
He's like, oh, you left me some money, miss.
I'm free. I don't know if they told you, but I'm free.
Oh, that was the dumbest thing ever. And she's being a dick to him.
And I think it's just like further proving like she's an asshole.
But I'm like, why are you still making me hate her so much?
No, Elena, you would be a dick to him if he was joking, if you just fucked him and he was like... oh, hey, here's some money.
Ha ha ha. You'd be like, dude, get the fuck away from me.
But it's your husband. That was like early on, I think, though.
They were married. Yeah. I think because she was just going out to work.
He was just waking up and he had like shaving cream on his face.
I think he was just doing like a hotel, though.
No, it was in their house. Cause it was showing their home.
Like it was showing their like, the nice memories in their home while they were standing amongst like the wreckage.
But I was like, that's like a cute bit. Like, he's just trying to be funny.
And she was like a real dick about it. And I was like, I just don't like you, Amy.
Maybe I just like... 2004 Johnny Depp is like a great Johnny Depp so I was like I was feeling a little upset I was feeling protective of that Johnny Depp before that Well, before that is prime Johnny Depp, but this was like right before he fell off the wagon there.
This is when he fell off the wagon. yeah this was like right then so i was still i was still into it then but then it breaks off.
But either way, I felt protected. Except for Tusk.
In this part, in this part, Ted and Amy, Ted is being a dick.
Ted like shows up and pretends this is his house.
And I was like, you need to step away, Ted.
Like I was understanding it. And the fire chief says it's definitely arson, like, for sure.
Asks about enemies. None of them have one, but he's like, yeah, I have one.
It's called Shooter. Like, I don't know what to tell you.
And the only reason I'm going to mention this next part is because it has to do with why he came up with a shooter.
But like they go to look over their like shared property and they kick Ted out of the insurance place like you can't look at the shared property.
And then they meet outside. They have a little argument.
And he's like, where are we from, Teddy?
And he's like, Tennessee. And then he's like, where?
And he's like, a little place called Shooter's Bay.
And I was like, oh no. That's the one part I didn't know.
I didn't have anything on that. That's it.
He says a little place called Shooter's Bay.
And you're like, oh, that's where that is.
That's cool. So he goes back home to the cabin.
And the phone is ringing and it's Ken. He's saying you check the place out and everything is fine.
And of course he didn't get the magazine again and now the house is burned down.
So he's like, shit, I don't have the proof.
But Ken's like, don't worry, I got the original.
And I'm like, why didn't you just do that to begin with?
Why did we make this complicated? But okay.
So he's like, all right, I got the original one.
It's going to come to you tomorrow. And he's like, I also talked to Tom who had driven by you and beeped at you. because he saw you in Shooter and Tom was real cagey about it.
So he's like, let's meet tomorrow morning at 9 a.m. with Tom.
We're going to talk about it. So they're like, cool.
This is when he starts having like TMJ issues.
Also, by the way, this is when he starts like really aggressively cracking his jaw.
And I was like, what's happening? And this happens a lot during the movie.
And I found a reason for it, but when it first happened, I was like, are you okay, sir?
But he wakes up late, so he misses the whole thing.
And... He ends up, I think like he found Shooter's hat outside his house that morning, which I never understood really the reason for that, but...
He found it in his house, right? Was that this part or was that later?
I think he found it like on his porch. Yeah, it was on his porch.
He opened the door, and it was right there.
And then I think a little bit after, I might be jumping ahead, but...
Shooter does show up and he's like, bring your manuscript.
Bring your bruises and bring your six-gun, pilgrim.
Pilgrim. And then he's like, I want my hat back, by the way.
Well, he ends up going to meet Tom and Ken and they don't show up.
So he's like, fuck. So he goes to the meeting place and that's when Shooter shows up.
And he's like, or no, actually first I forgot he sees Ted at a gas station in town.
And that's when he has the confrontation with Ted.
And what Ted is talking about is the divorce.
He wants him to sign the divorce papers.
And he's like, you need to get out of my life.
But Mort thinks he's talking about, he thinks that he sent Shooter as like a hitman, basically. to like intimidate him into signing these divorce papers.
So they end up talking about two different things to each other and Ted goes to punch him and punch the window dude cause Johnny Depp has fucking cat like reflexes apparently and he just like moves over and he punches the window and he's like ha ha He goes, bummer, Ted.
That's what it was. And then he leaves. Yep.
So then that's when he goes and he ends up answering the phone and Shooter's like, meet me at the same place.
So he meets Shooter again. And Shooter's like... And he sees the car... that tom was driving before parked there and he's like well shit it's tom and he sees tom Well, Tom has a screwdriver through his head.
He's sitting in the front seat of the car with a screwdriver in his head.
And Ken... And Ken the security dude is in the back seat with a fucking hatchet in his neck.
I don't even know why he was with him. Because he was supposed to be meeting Tom.
Because they were going to meet... What's his name?
Oh, yeah. This is when, so he sees these two things.
He's like, what the fuck is going on? And then he locks eyes with a squirrel in a tree. passes out.
Yeah. Why did he pass out? He passed out just because I think from seeing dead bodies.
I think he just like was like But he saw the squirrel.
He didn't pass out from the dead bodies.
He passed out from the squirrel. He passed out after locking eyes with a squirrel.
Like having a full-on moment with a squirrel.
And he wakes up. Why aren't these the things that...
Kep explains. I need that explained. I truly need that explained.
Why are you explaining other things and not that?
Maybe I didn't... finish it i can't remember i might have turned it off like the last 10 minutes so maybe i wish he explained No, I think I've finished it, and I don't think he explains it.
One thing he does explain is the dog killing, though.
Of course he has to explain that. He doesn't explain it, though.
He just defends himself. He's like... So, uh, I'm a dog killer from way back.
I killed a dog in Lost World. The decision to kill the dog was not... I'm a dog killer from way back.
I killed a dog in Lost World. Got plenty of mail about that.
Nobody cares about... I mean, he also kills four people in the movie.
I don't know. That seems mildly objectionable to me.
It's a way of sending a message, surely, to a character that you're serious. and it's a relatively easy way to get the audience to hate your bad guy.
Ew, he's the worst. Yeah, he's just like, I mean, I could get it if you're like, No, I had to convey emotion, and he does say that.
He's like, oh, I have to convey emotion, because what does it more?
He's like, I'm a dog killer. A dog killing.
I have to kill a dog because I've always been a dog killer.
He's like, that's my thing. Yeah, when he said it was like his thing, I was like... Like, not cute.
Shut the fuck up. I'm not interested anymore.
Not cute at all. It's not... It wasn't even good.
No. Well, after he locks eyes with the squirrel, we'll never know why.
We'll never know why that happened. But he wakes up and Shooter is standing there and says he's been out for three hours, which I was like, holy shit.
And he goes to try to run away from him and he's like falling because his leg's asleep.
And Shooter goes, your leg's sleeping. You lay on the damn thing.
And then he's like... Hey, by the way, you shouldn't leave because that screwdriver is yours.
So I tied you to these murders. So you maybe shouldn't run away.
And then he's telling him, I have the magazine.
He's like, it's coming tomorrow. And this is when Shooter's freaking out again.
He's like, no, it can't be in there. This is my story.
And he's like, all right, meet me in two hours at my cabin.
And he's like, I'm going to fucking give you this thing and then you'll go away.
I have the magazine. I have the magazine.
I have it. That's exactly, I have that in my notes.
Like, I have the magazine. And he also tells him, this is like one of my favorite lines because I was like, wow, what a writer you are, Shooter.
Because he goes, by the way, you talk to that sheriff of yours again?
And if you don't show up at four o'clock, I'll burn your life and every person in it like a cane field in a high wind.
Wait, but also, what sheriff? He already killed the sheriff.
No, he didn't kill the sheriff. He killed the security guard.
Wait. Because the sheriff comes later. Dutton is the security guard.
He's the security guard? Or like a bodyguard.
Wait, what? Okay, I did not know that. I thought he was the fucking sheriff.
No way. He's the bodyguard. Okay. Who's the sheriff?
The sheriff is like the old guy. He comes later.
That guy?! ! Yeah, the old guy is the sheriff.
He tells me he got it over Charles Dutton.
The sheriff is an old guy who's doing, like, needlepoint.
Are you fucking kidding me, dude? I remember him now.
Okay, that pisses me off. Shooter tells him, I will leave you alone and I will turn myself in if you show me this proof.
He's like, and you know what? To be honest, I'll kill myself before trial because if I'm that crazy, that's what I'm going to do.
Then he goes, listen. You got my hat. I want it.
You got my hat. I want my hat. I want it.
So he ends up like taking care of it. He likes, you know, rolls the car off a cliff and then, you know, just a casual cliff, a casual cliff that comes out of nowhere.
And he goes home, the phone is ringing again, and of course it's fucking Amy again.
I'm annoyed at her, so I understand. And she's being annoying and she's acting like she's worried about him and that she cares fucking at all about him.
Do you think things would be different if we didn't lose the baby?
If we didn't lose the baby. I was like, really?
Are you really bringing up a miscarriage right now?
He's clearly having a psychotic break. Like, why are you doing this to him?
And he's like, are you kidding me right now?
And then they start talking about their relationship.
And she's like, and she says, I only cheated on you with Ted.
Only Ted. Yeah. I'm like, oh, that's good.
And she's like, and he wanted us to tell you.
And then she goes... the look on your face.
And I was like, what the fuck? No, you know what else is fucking ridiculous?
At one point she's talking about Ted because it almost sounds like she's like done with him and she's like I'm ready to go back to you and she's like Oh, yeah.
She says something about Ted. He's like, where's Ted?
She's like, he left. And then he's like, oh, you guys broke up?
And she's like, no, he just went to the store.
Yeah, she's like, no, he's coming back. I'm going to his place.
And you're like, oh. That's not how you say that. like shit no and then after she acts like she cares about him and then drops the whole like remember your face when you walked in on us after we had fucked?
Yeah. She's like, here, here's this emotion ball.
And then she's like, You know what, it would be cool if you signed those divorce papers.
He's like, oh, that's what you were calling for, you dick.
Yeah, he just hangs up. He's like, I'm done.
He has severe TMJ again, like immediately.
TMJ? And I looked it up. And temporomandibular disorders, or TMJ... are common with psychological disorders and they often come along with schizophrenia.
Why is it called TMJ if it ends with a disorder?
Well, because TMD is the temporomandibular disorder, but TMJ is like a specific jaw disorder.
That's what he's supposed to have? Or like joint disorder.
Yeah. And he's in, I don't know, but I was looking it up and it looked like that's what it was.
And if that's what it was, it is common with like schizophrenia or anxiety or depression.
It will come along with it. So it makes sense if he's going in through a schizophrenic break that he would have TMJ.
So I was like, okay, that makes me feel better about this constant jaw cracking thing.
But so she hangs up the phone and she says she's going to make him sign the papers.
Ted wants to go with her, but she's like, no, stay here.
This is when he goes to get the manuscript from the post office and the girl behind the desk like flirts with him.
She comes back later. And so he ends up seeing the sheriff briefly to the old sheriff and he's real suspicious of him.
But Ted had decided to follow Amy to the cabin.
Amy shows up or no, excuse me, before Amy shows up, this is when he has his like total breakdown in the cabin.
Yes. punches the window or something like that right yeah he because he opens the package And the magazine is in there, but his story has been cut out of the magazine.
Yeah, yeah, it's the whole magazine aside from that.
Yeah, this is when he makes him totally break.
So he ends up having a ton of TMJ. He's looking in the mirror a lot.
He puts on Shooter's hat. And he starts talking to himself as Shooter, as him.
Fighting himself. Yeah, he's saying like, you know, you remember Shooter's Bay, Pilgrim, you made this up.
It's like these flashback things of him in Shooter's point of view.
But you know what really fucking pissed me off?
It just goes to him and you look at him and it's just him like... slowly putting on the hat like Darth Vader putting on his helmet.
Yes! I was like, what? You did not just fucking do that.
And he's just walking around the whole time like, I'm shooter now.
Look at my big, ridiculous fucking hat. And you realize that he got that hat at an estate sale when he was with Amy once.
He just put it on in a mirror and was like, My name's John Shooter.
Like, I'm from Mississippi. Like, I'm a dairy farmer from Mississippi.
And that's the whole explanation. That's it.
Yeah, that's it. He just put that on. And so he's yelling he's yelling at himself. and then they do that thing that they do in the craft where he looks in the mirror and he turns to the left and like his reflection turns with him like the opposite you know what I mean like it's not a reflection And then Shooter shows up and is standing on the stairs.
And again, they're talking back and forth.
You see the flashback of him creating Shooter.
And then he's like, you need to fix the ending.
Yeah. And this is when Amy pulls in. And Amy pulls in and all the pages are everywhere from the secret window story, the one that was cut out of the magazine.
They're floating everywhere. Just flying around ridiculously.
Yeah. And also they had you go through the mirror again, so now you're in reality.
And that's why you don't see Shooter again.
Not taking that. According to the director.
Yeah, not taking that. I'm not taking that.
I won't believe it. But she walks in, she sees all the papers everywhere, the place is ransacked.
She's like calling for him. She sees the Jack Daniels on the table and she's like, oh, he's probably just drunk somewhere.
So let's go find him. And then you start seeing that shooter.
The word shooter is carved into various places in this house. have that right here why'd he carve it in the fucking wall the last thing it says shooters here and it's fucking Johnny hiding behind the door It says shoot her.
It says shoot her? Yeah, it says shoot her.
You're kidding. No. No, it says shoot her.
What? Like meaning shoot your wife. Oh, shut the fuck up.
It did not. Yeah, because she's seeing all these and she's like, what a shooter.
What the fuck? And then she sees him with the hat.
The door is closing and next time it says, shoot.
And then as the door closes, it says, her.
Oh my God. And he's talking in the accent and he's telling her Mort's dead.
And then he has scissors. He chases her out the door with the scissors.
She grabs her keys, tries to start her car.
He breaks a window with a rock and drags her out of the car while she's going.
Without removing the accent. I am so sorry, missus, but right is right and fair is fair and something has got to be done.
Yeah, without, oh, he's full accent this whole time, which I appreciate.
And she ends up kicking him in the nose, so he's like bleeding everywhere.
She runs out to the back. He ends up pushing her into a rock.
She slams her head. Somehow she's just incapacitated on the ground after falling.
I was like, I feel like you wouldn't be totally incapacitated, but okay.
No, but she's done and he just drags her back in the house.
Just done. Well, and he grabs a shovel and he's talking like Shooter.
And he's saying, you know, it was Mort Rainey's idea.
And he's like, I got a place for you, miss.
Yeah. Oh yeah, he doesn't take her into the house.
She's still laying there and she's like, you are mort rating.
Yes, she just keeps saying it over and over.
You are. more rainy. By the way, I want you to know that none of this was my idea.
It was Mr. Rainey all along. You are I got a place for you.
I got it all picked out. And then Ted pulls up and we see Ted come in and I was like, oh, get him.
Get him, shooter, get him. But Mort waits at the back door until Ted comes through the porch and Amy's yelling for Ted which I was like stop yelling for him you're like bringing him to his death but okay And he runs out the back door and Mort just takes the shovel and just brains him with the shovel as soon as he comes through.
And I'm going to say least satisfying shovel to head noise I've ever heard in my life.
I agree. I wanted it to be like a crack. dunk and he just went out it really was it was like dunk It was ridiculous.
And he ends up chopping him with this shovel, like chopping him up, which I was like, all right, I get that.
That's pretty cool. And he goes over to her and he's reciting the end of the story.
And then he chops her with the shovel. It's supposed to parallel his book.
Exactly. And then it just kind of skips forward a little bit.
We see him walking into the general store and he looks like shit.
And not like a hot mess like he did before.
I preferred before. His hair is like in a perfect page boy, like perfectly coiffed haircut.
He's changed his glasses to these awful little glasses and he has braces and I was so stressed out about it all.
Oh, it was him with braces? He had braces.
Oh, I did write that. I thought I wrote it was the girl that had braces that showed up because he sees the girl again.
But no, I did write it was him with braces.
I wanted to push that out of my mind, I guess.
I didn't even want to read that right. The post office girl shows up and he's like, hey, girl, like he starts flirting with her, which I was like, she looks way too young for you, sir.
But OK. And he's not, she's not into it.
She's freaked out. Everyone seems freaked out by him.
He ends up buying Morton salt. Hate it. Butter and napkins.
And he leaves. And the sheriff shows up in his cabin.
The old sheriff. Did he have Doritos on that too?
I don't know if he did because when he came... I can't remember.
Because when he comes into the... The sheriff walks into the cabin because... because it's like open.
So he's like, sure, I can just walk in. And there's fucking, there's a kitchen full of corn.
It's just everywhere. And he goes upstairs and he's like, hey, and he sees him at his desk.
He's eating an ear of corn. And he's like, I've just been writing because I've been so inspired by that murder.
The sheriff goes, listen, both you and I know what you did.
Maybe we don't have enough to put you away right now, but eventually we'll find those bodies, tie you to them, and you're going away.
And then he tells him, but in the meantime, don't go into the general store because you're freaking people out.
Everyone knows you did it. So now we know everybody knows he's a murderer.
And he says... Let me finish this off, please.
Yes. I have a very big issue with this whole ending.
He talks about, like, he's talking to the sheriff.
He's just like, no, yeah, yeah, no. My ending?
Very good. Perfect. The only thing that matters is the ending.
The only thing that matters is the ending.
That is what he says. And immediately my brain was like, that is the fucking idiots involved with this.
The writer or the director kept anyone involved in this, trying to say that the ending to this specific movie, not to the story in the movie, to this movie is perfect.
Yep. Oh, yeah, that was definitely because it was right before the ending of the movie that he says all that matters is the ending.
And then he says, in this one, it's very good.
This one's perfect. And then he has TMJ.
He has that jaw thing. He does the jaw thing.
It fades out the window. It goes from... him over to the window out into the garden and then it's like and it says i know i can do it I know I can do it and was it on the screen I don't know if it was on the screen or if someone said it but it was like in the end her death will be a mystery to everyone dot dot dot Even me and then it pans this fucking cornfield and And then all of a sudden it just cuts back to Depp, like goes black for a second, goes back to him.
Chomping into court. And it's just... With his fucking braces and everything.
His big old braces right up in the fucking screen just biting this fucking, just crunching this corn on the cob.
I don't know why that happened. I have no idea why that happened.
I don't either. I don't either. And you know what's even crazier? if you sat through the credits, which I'm sure you did not, You sat through the credits.
At the end of the credits, you will hear Johnny Depp Singing in the shooter voice, little baby loves shortening, shortening.
Mama's little baby loves shortening, shortening.
Mama's little baby loves shortening bread.
The thing is, Elena, I always stay after credits.
Did you stay? Yeah. Yeah, well the thing is, I'm the only person, like when Ash requested Ma a long time ago, I have this whole theory, and I know it's not even just a theory.
I've confirmed it with every single person that I have asked so far, thus far.
I've had fans email me and say, hey, you're right about that.
And the thing is at the end of Ma, like three minutes after the credits, I was like, there's no way anyone would stay for the credits.
Even like Bree or, that did it with me, she was like, yeah, no, I didn't see that.
I was like, did you see the end credits?
She was like, no. And I was like, it completely denounces. the entire ending of the movie.
It makes it a completely different ending.
Holy shit. no one has seen it. I have asked every person.
I'm like, Hey, do you know about the end scenes of mock?
Cause they talk about it. I'm like, do you know about the end credit?
I just asked them what the ending is too.
I'm like, what's the ending? And they're like, oh, this, that.
And I'm like, no, that's not it. No, that's not it.
Yeah. So I stay after credits. I do because there's always...
A lot of times there's something weird. And I also, I'm one of those weird people that goes through and I look at like who did the score and like, you know, sound department and whatnot like i'm a weirdo like that so so you heard him doing the like And he did it in like a growly voice.
He's like, little baby love short. I mean, I didn't want to talk about it, but yeah, I heard it.
I'm forcing, I'm bringing it out into the open.
I was hoping you didn't hear it because I wasn't going to mention it.
Oh, I heard it. I heard it, and I was like, I'm confused by this.
I don't understand. As anyone would be. But the whole point is, the whole ending is that he clearly killed amy and ted and he buried him in his garden and he's i think I don't know if the bite is supposed to be like I'm eating the corn that grew from her decomposing body.
Like... It's just supposed to like hammer that in.
Oh my god, is that what it is? I think that's what it is.
I think because it shows you that her body is underneath that soil that is growing corn.
And then he takes a big chomp into the corn.
So I think it's like, look at this brace-faced motherfucker eating that corn that came from a dead body.
So this is like a parallel to people growing a tree out of a dead body except Johnny Depp is growing corn and eating it.
And eating it a lot, apparently. Apparently that's all he's eating.
He's just sitting eating corn. Alright, there's four kills in this movie.
I give this zero fucking stars. I will never watch this movie again.
I will not recommend this to anyone. If anyone ever, if I was hanging out with someone and it's like toward the end of the night and you're hanging out, you're done hanging out, you're like, let's watch a movie.
And they're like. Hey, let's watch Secret Window.
I will leave. I will go home. I will not let you request another movie.
I will not talk about it. I will not discuss it.
I'm gone. I will not even say anything to you.
I will leave. I probably won't talk to you for a week.
Meanwhile, I give this three out of four pilgrims.
Three out of four pilgrims? I give it a three out of four pilgrims.
Wait, we're going out of four? Who goes out of four?
Who goes out of four? Me. So if this was out of five, what would you give this?
Four out of five. that's a bad rating I love it see when you were gonna say you were gonna say three out of five and I was like that's that's fine I guess like it's not fine but it fine, but... No way.
No way. I give this... I don't know why I went out of four.
I feel like four just felt right, but...
I've never heard that. It's always 10 or 5, and Elena's like, 4?
5. Three out of four, Pilgrim. 3.75, I give.
I can't believe this. Yeah, I give it a four out of five pilgrims.
Well, I don't know when the last time, even on like my other show, my other show is a completely horror movie show.
So we'll pretty much. I don't think I've ever given anything straight up zero.
Yeah. But I give this a zero. I feel pretty good about being able to do that for you.
It was painting me. You know, when I first watched it... I think it took years off your life.
When I first watched it, I don't know what happened, but there was some scene that happened.
And I was so angry that I literally just turned it off.
Wow. I just turned it off. I went back to it like four hours later.
Wow, I love that. I feel really good about that.
I'm not gonna lie. I feel great about that.
I'm a little nervous of what's to come my way, but as like retaliation for that, but you know.
I tried doing something I tried to threaten Elena with doing like all 27 Amityvilles and she was like and I was like let's do it she was like oh yeah cool that sounds good and I was like what I've tried to do this like nine other people and they've all told me that they weren't gonna talk to me anymore No, I was like, let's do this.
Yeah, so now I'm thinking I have to go really brutal with you Oh, God.
Because I watch, I'm going to tell you, Elena, and for the fans, I guess, too.
Like we said in the beginning, Elena is really like a 2000s witchy kind of person, like Fluffy Movies, I'd say.
Like I can get down with some... some weird but i have a good array but i lean more towards the other Yeah, that's the thing.
She likes weird stuff. Like, I know she does.
She's a fucking, I mean, for people that don't know and don't listen to Morbid, she's a fucking autopsy technician.
Is that the right term? Yeah, it is. So, I am... connoisseur of weird stuff and i also it goes into my movie preference that's what drew us together Yeah, exactly.
And I have a very big taste for food. fucked up movies I'm actually doing one of the first really fucked up movies on Horsesuit pretty soon and uh I think I'm going to get you back with some because I have a lot in my docket.
I'm a little scared. I have a lot. I'm real scared.
We're gonna bounce from two very different areas. yeah and that's and I think that's gonna be the fun of the show you know sometimes in one week it's gonna be Elena's weird fluffy stuff and I guess Johnny Depp and she already like mentioned something with what was it Lindsay Lohan Oh, yeah.
I Know Who Killed Me. Yeah, that was... That one will be a hate watch.
A hate rewatch. Yeah. Okay, okay. So at least you're not going to like it because I'm not going to like that.
Yeah, that one will be fun to make fun of because that's a true train wreck.
But it's one that has to happen. But yeah, it'll be stuff like that.
I mean, the first movie that me, you and Ash and Brie ever covered together was Jennifer's Body. yeah I love that flick Yeah, that one I love, and I do love a lot of, well, some movies from that era.
I'm going to say some. Just some. We won't go as far as a lot.
Yeah, I'm going to say some at best. But, you know, it's going to be very two different worlds every week, and I'm pretty excited.
So it's something for everyone. Maybe not on my weeks.
Yeah. Something for a few people. We'll lose a lot of listeners on my weeks.
Oh, well, hopefully everybody enjoyed Secret Window.
Go watch it. No, don't say that. Don't say that. it's great is that the end of the show Elena it's about the end right I'd say so So I guess we should do a couple things.
First of all, since this is the first episode, and I guess I'll do it a few more times before I get bored, thank you to the fans and the people that are listening to this new show.
Thank you if you've taken time to let us travel through your ear meat.
Ear meat? That's a term. We appreciate it.
If you do like us, go ahead and review us because, you know. iTunes reviews kind of bump you up and whatnot.
It's good stuff. Yeah, five-star reviews are loved.
I don't think we haven't set everything up yet, but as of this time, email us at screenpodcast at yahoo.com.
Couldn't get the Gmail. You can follow us on, it was Instagram at Scream Podcast.
Follow us on Twitter at The Scream Pod. It's official.
It's there. It's set in stone. I think that's everything.
I didn't make a Facebook. I literally don't even do Facebook on anything else.
I actually hate Facebook. I fucking hate it.
If you don't want to make one, I don't care.
If you want to make one and just not do anything with it, just leave it there. do the you know instagram thing where you go share yeah you share to both yeah we can do that we do we can do that And I think the last thing is, we mentioned a little bit, we have other podcasts, and you have another one that we didn't mention, so do yours first.
I have another podcast called Morbid, a true crime podcast.
You can find us anywhere that you listen and you can follow our Twitter at amorbidpodcast.
Instagram. I think we're just at Morbid Podcast.
Morbid Podcast. And you can also go listen to our podcast. podcast called Crime Countdown and it's also me and Ash And it's like top 10 list and shit.
I don't really know. You can follow us at Parcast somewhere about there.
You can find it. It's on Parcast. you can follow Parcast yeah it's in Parcast you can find it you can follow Parcast Go review it and whatnot.
It's still fairly new. Well, I guess it'll be a little bit less new once this comes out.
But it's still a little bit in its infancy.
Morbid is like the veteran. The veteran.
That is the veteran. I have Whore Soup, which is, I guess, my veteran that I've done, like, forever.
If you listened early on, I did it with my friend Bree. have time for it anymore and that's what's going on and I'm going to force her back into it eventually.
It'll happen. But for now, I do like horror movies and I cover them with other guests like directors, actors, just my friends sometimes and whatnot.
And yeah, horse soup. You can find that anywhere.
Just search horse soup. I'm not going to give you specifics.
You can find it. It's the fucking internet.
I also have another podcast called I'll Suck Your Blood that's a vampire movie podcast and we pretty much just cover all arrays of Vampire, but I do that with my buddy James from Night Shift Video.
Really cool guy. Again, find us some places at I'll Suck Your Blood And Jim Tan Laundry, that one you can find in even less places. but if you go to like a podcast player and search Jim Tan Laundry you'll find my Jersey Shore podcast that I do with Bree and my buddy And Bree kind of has time for that one.
She has a little bit of time for that one.
We love Bree. And again, I don't think I have to do this here, but again, thank you to Ethan Hurt for our music, man.
It's fucking awesome. Yeah, thank you, Ethan.
And thank you to Casey Booth for our artwork too.
Yes, Casey Booth. Both of you guys absolutely killed it.
You helped make this show. what it was.
And personally, I want to thank you, Elena, just for coming to me with this in general.
I think this is fucking awesome. This is something I've always wanted to do.
Like, specifically with you. I love that.
This is just great. I mean, I've said it before on my show and I think on your show, but...
You and The Horror Show and Last Podcast on the left.
You were the three top ones. that inspired me to ask Brie to start a podcast a couple years ago.
I love that. I love you, Caleb. Thank you so much.
And thank you for doing this with me. You're the only person I would want to do this podcast with.
I was immediately like, yes. My heart. My heart.
Even though I hate you for doing this movie.
Even though I've destroyed your soul and you'll destroy mine, I'm sure.
I'm so excited for this show and what's to come.
And again, thank you guys for listening to the first episode.
Yeah, thanks so much and come back. Do we do a sign-off?
What kind of sign-off could we do for this?
This show is the rage. Shows the rage. The sky's the part of me We'll be right back.
Hey. Thank you. Is he there? No. We're not together.
Wow. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't on the verge of doing Snoopy dances.
No more tea. What I meant was we're not together at the moment.
He's coming over later. He hardly ever comes here.
I usually go to his house. There's a useful detail.
Thanks for that. Don't ask, then. It was working just fine that way.
If you like Morbid, you can listen early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at wondery.com slash survey.
The town of Agde in France is famous for sun, sand, sea and sex.
But lately, life on the coast has taken a strange turn.
The town's mayor, a respected pillar of the community, has been arrested for corruption.
His wife claims he's been bewitched by a beautiful clairvoyant.
Then there's the mysterious phone calls that local people have been getting.
I am the Archangel Michael. The whole town has been thrown into chaos.
As the mayor is unable to carry out his duties I would like to address you all Legal proceedings have been initiated Join me, Anna Richardson, and journalist Leo Schick for The Mystic and the Mayor as we investigate a story of power, corruption, and magic.
Binge all episodes of The Mystic and the Mayor exclusively and ad-free right now on Wondery+.
Start your free trial in Apple Podcasts Spotify or the Wondery app
