This is the Business English Podcast, Episode 204, Two English Phrases to Elevate Office Talk at Work.
Welcome to the Business English podcast from All Ears English.
Get the English skills you need to achieve your dreams in global business.
For a presentation, a meeting, or your office party, this is Real Business English with your favorite American hosts, Lindsay and Michelle, coming to you from New York City and Colorado, USA.
Still translating in your head when you speak English?
It's time to change that. The Connected Communicator course from All Ears English helps you train your ear, speak naturally, and finally connect with real people.
In our tailored study plan, you'll hear unscripted interviews from tattoo artists to entrepreneurs from all across America. and you'll use new AI tools to practice speaking anytime you want.
No more stiff, scripted English. Build confidence, fluency, and cultural insight all in one course.
Plus, get real-life speaking experience at our Open Conversation Club every single week and build community with Allers English teachers and students.
Go to allersenglish.com slash connection to save $50 this week only.
Offer ends August 10th. allearsenglish.com slash connection.
Well, Lindsay, have you ever had a best friend at work?
A best friend at work? No, maybe when I was in Japan, my fellow like native teacher was a really good friend.
We became really close friends, but I wouldn't say a best friend at work.
What about you? Yeah, I don't think best friend.
I've talked about some of my work relationships on the show, like work brother, work, you know, all these things, but I don't, I don't think I've had a best friend at work.
So yeah, but today we're going to be talking about having a best friend at work.
But before we do that, guys, head on over to episode 177.
This was how to brag in the business world.
I love that idea. I love that episode. Check it out, guys.
So today, are we talking about an article that we found here?
Yeah, I thought this was really interesting.
And I wanted to bring it into share. We'll teach you guys things, talk a little bit about it.
But It comes from CNBC.com. Okay. And it's called, well, that title is actually 63% of Gen Z workers have a best friend in the office.
There are two potential drawbacks, experts say.
And this is, it was from November 14th, 2023 by Aditi Shrikant.
So this is, I thought it would be interesting to talk about it today.
Yeah, that's really interesting. That's very high.
Anytime we're talking about 60% of anything, that's quite high, isn't it, Michelle?
Yes, yes, exactly. So here's just one quote from the article.
It says more than half, 51% of all workers and 63% of Gen Z workers.
Yeah, exactly. So it's interesting how they're talking about the different generations, say they have a best friend at work, according to a recent Glassdoor survey.
So this is from Glassdoor guys. So what do you think?
Do you think it's a good thing to have a best friend at work?
What do you think? So I just want to make sure I'm clear.
So does this mean that their best friend of their life is a coworker?
Or does that mean that there's someone that they like better than others at work?
I guess I'm not 100% clear. Well, here it says, I'm looking, it says, uh, an office bestie.
That's what they say. Um, I, I, I believe that they're talking about a work.
Yeah. Friendship. I mean, they have a close friendship at work, right?
Yeah. From what I'm looking here, that's, that's what I understand.
Okay. So there's someone at work that they really relate to and connect with more than others.
A bestie. It's a bestie. Yeah. Okay. Okay.
Yeah. Do I think it's a good thing in that case?
Um, Yeah, I think it's good to have human connections.
I mean, our show is all about connection, connection, not perfection.
We want those human connections. That's what keeps us alive as human beings.
So I think it's good, but maybe there are some downsides that we'll learn about now.
Yeah, well, some of the good things, yeah, that the article mentions is Of course, it's going to make you feel happier.
It's going to make you less stressed. You're able to relieve your stress.
So lots of good things. Yeah. But yeah, they do mention there are some things that could happen.
So this is an interesting one that they bring up is what if somebody gets a promotion and they become the supervisor for the other one?
Now, that's that's. little awkward what do you think about that yeah that's definitely awkward that's super awkward um it could happen right because especially in large companies people move around all the time laterally vertically um people become other people's direct reports sometimes right so that could be awkward Yeah.
I mean, it, it said, okay, if something like that does happen, it's a, you know, you should discuss the situation with them.
Right. Don't, don't just avoid it and shy away and say, ah, that's too awkward.
Um, yeah. I mean, because this can be, um, you just, it's the elephant in the room that things are going to change, that things are now a little bit different, um, unfortunately.
And, um, It's hard, I guess, for each person.
If you are the one that's now the supervisor, you might feel awkward telling this person things that they should do, or you might not know how to show that you're the boss.
I feel like it'd be more awkward for the person who's elevated to the management level.
Because now there are certain things you can't necessarily share, right?
That you would have shared. It just changes the game entirely.
Yeah, yeah. So I think that's, I mean, I'm trying to think like, is there a chance that two people like, yeah, what if, what if it is the other way where you come in with the best friend, you both happen to work at the same company, and you've already been best friends, maybe the article mentions it a little bit, I'm not sure.
But like, that, I feel like it's even worse.
Yeah. Right. If they're already in your life, they're an important part of your life.
And now one of you is a manager and one's a direct report.
Oh, messy, messy. No. Yeah. Yeah. One of the other things they say could be tricky is they say it's, this is the quote, it says, it's hard to maintain discretion.
So, you know. What do we mean by that discretion?
What does that mean? Yeah, discretion. It's like you don't want to like, you know, give away certain things.
Discretion is, you know, if the dictionary says behaving or speaking in a way to avoid causing offense.
Oh, I see what you mean. Right. So now all of a sudden, if you're the manager, you have all these new responsibilities around how you talk to the person below you and then how you talk about other people at work, right?
That maybe you didn't have before because you were at the same level of that other person, right?
Yep. Yep. So it says... You know, you have to avoid being super direct when you talk about your other coworkers.
And, you know, you have to be careful. Don't share what you talk about outside of these conversations.
Yes. It definitely places a strain on the relationship.
No question. Right. What else did the article say?
Well, this was interesting. I thought this was a cute little thing I wanted to share.
They said a Las Vegas rule. What is that?
Do you know what that means? No clue. I think what they're trying to say is like what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
So basically don't share things that you talk about.
Such a famous quote. We could do a whole other episode about that.
Yes. yeah um okay so don't share things meaning what meaning what you talked about like if you're talking about something i don't know i feel like this whole thing is just very sticky in my opinion i mean because can you even still have these conversations like if you're complaining you i mean i don't think so i don't think you can have them at all especially if you are in like a toxic environment right and they say that work friendships tend to be stronger sadly when you are you have like a toxic boss or something you can be very close very quickly with your co-workers at the same level or at a similar level but now one of you has been elevated So before you were complaining, you were talking about maybe your boss behind their back.
That was fine because you're at the same level.
Now one of you has been elevated. You can't exactly do that, right?
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, the whole thing to me is kind of mean spirited.
I mean, I feel that sometimes friendships at work, like you said, they can turn in a way to like just... you're complaining you're making fun of people um you know i think in general when you start a job or when you're making friends with people you really have to be careful that it doesn't just turn into a place to complain or to tease people behind their backs oh for sure yeah you have to be careful what you say what you write because you never know what's gonna get out um that could make things awkward for you that could get you in trouble and just also in general it's that becomes a toxic environment.
Like Lindsay said. Yeah. And you just don't want to be at an environment that perpetuates that kind of thing.
I guess every big corporation is going to have some of that, but yeah.
Yeah. I mean, is the basic vibe of your company positive or is it toxic?
I mean, just yes or no. Which one is it?
And if it's toxic, you should think about maybe trying to move on to something else.
Like you can do better. Right. Yeah. That's what I think.
Yeah. Mm-hmm. See details online. Okay, Michelle, let's dig deeper into our opinions here.
All right. Well, we're just going to share a couple of things that you can say if you are with a coworker who might be complaining about someone too much.
Okay. All right. So to kind of show that you're not that person, you don't want to be that person and you're signaling this.
So what's something you could say? Yeah.
And I just want to give a little bit more context to the vibe here of what we're trying to convey.
It's the idea of, so you're saying these are people at the same level now.
We're not talking about mismatch and level anymore.
We're talking about your coworker at the same level.
And it makes me think of like, remember when Obama was running for his campaign, they had a phrase like, when they go low, we go high.
Oh, well, that's when Trump was running and Michelle Obama said when... Oh, yeah, yeah.
Okay, I had the wrong era. But anyways, I like the idea of just being the better person.
You know, just like, hey, I want to raise the...
EQ up here and I don't want to stoop that low.
I don't want to come down to that level.
And so these are the things we could say to try to bring that other person up to that higher level.
Because once you show that you're not going to be a part of that, people are going to look at you differently.
And maybe, I don't know, then they might talk about you.
I don't know. But that's not the point. The point is...
But at least you'll be able to live with yourself, right?
Yeah, it's true. It's very easy to, once you start complaining, it's very easy to let it get out of control and make things seem worse than they actually are.
Yes, that's a good point. We got to watch ourselves, watch our conduct.
So here's some phrases for our listeners, right?
If you feel that you need to use this at work, then deploy them, right?
So here we go. Can we talk about something else, right?
Very neutral, right? You're not accusing the person of doing anything wrong.
You're just saying, can we change the subject?
And that's the next one. Let's change the subject.
Let's change the subject. That's the next one.
Yeah. Did you have two things? Yeah. Just two ways.
Did you have anything like this at any of your jobs, like the radio station or anything?
Internships? I think so. I mean, I think there was a little...
It's also radio is very interesting because it's totally it's a it's an industry where there is kind of a lot of playful banter and teasing.
Right, right, right, right. It's very different than some other kinds of jobs.
Like it's just a creative. But at the same time, there were some no, there were some mean spirited things for sure.
Interesting. OK, huh. It's just I don't know.
It's hard to explain. It's not it's different than working in like a law office where this is. happening you know sure for sure yeah totally um all right so that's good to know so you you could and even in a good company i mean a great company like where the founder is positive is inspiring people and it's not toxic there could be like little circles that are kind of negative right of people and so we could use these phrases to kind of just bring up the general eq i'd say broadly yeah Yeah.
Yeah, definitely. Agreed. All right, guys, if you want to hear more ways to act at work and get all more information, make sure that you hit the follow button wherever you listen to the Business English podcast and definitely check out All Ears English as well.
Yeah. What's the takeaway? Where should we leave our listeners?
We've heard about the concept of what happens when we're friends with a coworker and then that person gets elevated to become our boss and how could that be?
And then if there is toxicity, what can you say to get people off that train of thought? away from that or to get yourself away from it yeah we've covered a lot today but i think it all comes down to what kind of a person do you want to be in the office how do you want to be looked at do you want to be someone who's contributing to a toxic environment or do you want to be the person who's when they go low we go high um but it can be very tricky so you want to be friendly with your co-workers but always understand somebody could get a different position.
Somebody could end up as your supervisor.
And you always have to be a little bit careful with the kinds of things that you say.
Yeah, that's so true. That's so true. So we can never be like a thousand percent open with everyone at work, right?
We always thinking about what's going to happen in six months.
Where is this person going to be in six months?
Are they going to be my boss? Am I going to be their boss?
Some companies do move people around like that.
My partner worked for a company that did do a lot of that and it was pretty jarring at times.
Really interesting. Good stuff. All right, Michelle.
Very interesting little glimpse into the corporate world.
Good stuff. All right. All right, guys. Well, thanks for listening and we'll see you in the next episode.
All right. Take care. Bye. Thank you for listening to Business English, a podcast just for you, the high achieving global professional.
Want more from All Ears English? Don't miss our biggest and best podcast with 8 million monthly downloads.
Just search for the All Ears English podcast and hit follow to get four new episodes per week on fluency, American culture, grammar, and so much more.
Or tap the link in the show notes. Remember, we believe in connection, not perfection when it comes to learning English.
Follow the All Ears English podcast now.
