this is an all ears English podcast episode 23 75.
It's about connection after all.
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When it comes to connection, it's all about acknowledging what has happened before in your conversations with someone.
Today, get one natural phrase to do this!
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Hey Michelle. How's it going?
Go ahead Lindsay, Lindsay.
Are we going to record extra episodes after all?
You know, it turns out Michelle, I need to have an early lunch today, so I Okay.
Lindsay. Today, we have a listener question about the expression after all that I'm really excited to get to.
Oh my gosh. And this question comes from our listener, Sophia, who did have a question last week that we answered as well, but you know what?
Sophia has amazing questions, very specific ones.
So, this is how you get your questions answered, is by sending in a very specific question, guys, to support at allearsenglish .com.
Okay. Love it. So, thank you, Sophia, for another great question.
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Okay? Sure. All right!
So, do you want me to read the question?
Oh yes! That would be great, Michelle.
Thank you. I'll do it.
Alright, here we go, this is from YouTube, from Sophia.
Hey, I'm Sophia, and I have a question about the phrase, after all, how is it used, and how does it change the tone of a sentence?
For example, so are you going to visit me after all?
My friend sent me this and she's just asking if I'm going to visit her, but it seems a bit intense.
Looking forward to your reply.
Thank you so much for creating such great learning content.
Well, thank you Sophia for another great question.
You are awesome. Yeah, we love those questions.
Keep them coming. So this is a great, it's almost like Sofia is really observing Native natural English.
After all it's a truly natural thing to say.
And there's a lot here.
We need to give some context, right?
Yes, exactly. You're so right.
And we're going to talk about that.
So let's dive into after all.
So the message Sofia received.
So are you going to...
Is it me? After all?
So Lindsay, what does it mean to you?
you will hear. So it's very, very different from just saying, are you going to visit me?
Right. What's different here is when we say, are you going to visit me after all?
It means that there was some kind of large discussion over whether or not she was going to be coming to visit.
There's a lot that's already happened.
There's a lot of context that we don't have, but it means they've had maybe she was wavering back and forth.
Oh, I can't come, I can come, I can't come, I This friend is saying, so are you going to visit me or maybe there was some kind of plan to come and she had to cancel and then she tried to come again.
She had to can't I don't know if there's a lot of there's layers.
There's layers to this.
It's basically, you know, saying that there's a surprise or twist that you're going to visit her if you do.
And like Lindsey said, there's a background to this.
There's more to the story.
There's context. So yes.
Yeah, maybe the hesitating and maybe you canceled or maybe you had rejected her invitation many years.
Yeah. And so it's kind of saying, oh, after all that you're going to come visit me.
So yeah, it's loaded.
It's totally loaded.
Very loaded. I mean, would you say this is intense?
Kind of intense. Absolutely.
Maybe they have a very intense friendship or something.
It's kind of emotional.
maybe, um, there's a lot here.
It's so different from a, hey, are you gonna come visit?
Totally different. Right.
Right. Exactly. And we don't, the truth is, Sophia, we don't really have enough information to truly answer this.
We would need more context, right?
It could be intense if it was meant more, like that second way where we're talking about, oh, you know, after all this time, I've been waiting and I'm kind of annoyed that you haven't visited me.
So it really, really kind of depends on the context, but let's give some more examples of how this would be used.
And we're going to do some role plays throughout this episode.
So get ready. All right.
Perfect. So let's start with that first role play, Michelle.
And here we are roommates.
And I said that I was moving out next year and then what happened?
Michelle will contact.
So you said you were going to move out, and then you sent me a message saying that you might reconsider.
Yeah, there's like a back and forth, though.
She's moving out now.
Are you changing your mind?
So you come home after you sent that text message.
And I am in the kitchen.
Okay, here we go. You're in the kitchen.
Alright, alright. Hey Michelle, did you get my text?
Oh, yeah. So you're going to resign after all.
It's not 100 % but I'm hoping to.
Great. Oh boy. Yeah.
So there was some confusion, some confusion that's happened, some back and forth, some indecision, right, a sense of people being indecisive maybe.
Yeah, so exactly, I meant, it basically was saying in the end, that's your decision, something changed.
There was a twist. And essentially what you're saying when you say after all, you're saying after all of that drama or after all of that confusion or that indecision.
Yeah. Right, exactly.
So let's do a this is a similar context So here here we got in a big fight about you moving out.
Okay, okay Then you sent the text, you know saying that you were thinking that you might reconsider Okay, so here you go here.
All right, you come home.
All right. Hey Michelle, did you get my text?
Hi Yeah, so you're staying after all I think so.
I'm sorry about before Thanks.
That doesn't seem like that's going to be a very good living statement.
Oh, that's awkward. Consider again.
Right. Yeah. They're going to say, Oh, you're leaving after all.
Yeah. Yeah. The point is there's just a lot that has to have happened before.
If you're going to add after all, it's not just a neutral question.
Okay. Right. Yep. It's loaded as long as it says yes.
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Okay, Michelle, we're back.
So again, it generally shows that something has changed.
There's been a twist in the story.
So for example, we have the phrase I thought he didn't like me, but he asked for a second date after all.
And here after all means, all my inner strife of worrying that this person didn't like me.
Okay. Exactly. Or maybe their texts haven't gone through or something.
Yes. Right? So there are a lot of ways to use after all, and we're gonna teach you one more way.
But we're gonna come back to this.
So after all, can also be used as a way to give an excuse or a reason or an explanation.
So, for example, I don't want to bother you, after all, I know you're still busy working on that project.
Yeah. This is a slightly more advanced way to use it, but I'm excited that we're going into this today.
Here's another example.
He slept until 3 p .m. After all, he's completely jet lagged still.
Or, I want to save money.
I'm hoping to buy a new house after all.
Yeah, now, how do we explain this part of Michelle this use of after all?
Well, yeah, it's a it's giving an extra, it's giving more information, right?
It's giving the excuse, the reason or the explanation.
So I want to save money.
So I could have just it sounds if I could have said I want to save money, I'm hoping to buy a new house.
Right. And then I could have cut it off here.
But this gives it rounds it out nicely.
rounds it out, gives it a little bit more context, maybe adds a little emotion to it, a little urgency, showing that this thing is maybe important to you.
I don't want to bother you.
After all, I know you're still busy working on that project.
So, again, you could have said I don't want to bother you.
I know you're still working on that project.
Totally legitimate to say that.
But we add the after all why, Michelle?
It just kind of rounds it out and it shows, those, it shows this extra level of understanding or this explanation, right?
It just, it shows that there's, I don't know, there's a little more oomph to it.
Do you know what? It's a great word. Oh yeah.
So make sure you can see that word written in the transcripts.
Alright, what else do we need to know here, Michelle?
Okay, great. So, um, I was adding oomph.
So, I mean, which way would you say is more common?
I mean, that first way or you know, the first way?
Yeah, you think the first one?
The first way. Yeah, I think the first way, but it is very very natural to for to use the second way.
It is rounding it out.
It's adding a little more context, maybe some emotional context, so I like both.
Yeah, I mean, I'm just glad that we could go over two very different ways of using these.
So, should we put it together in a role?
Yeah, let's put this together.
So, again, we need context what's happening.
We're friends in this situation, but you told me that you can't meet tonight for dinner because you're sick.
So, I'm gonna go out and I'm gonna run into you.
Uh -oh. And another friend in a restaurant.
I'm going to catch you in a lie.
Here we go. Now that our listeners have the context, here we go.
All right. Oh, hi Michelle, how are you feeling?
Oh, you know, it's the weirdest thing.
I guess I feel better after all.
I decided to get some soup and ran into Stacy.
Interesting. Of course, I guess you should get home though.
You're still probably carrying germs after all.
who I kind of gave you a little bit of a little insult there.
Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
This awkward, awkward scenario.
Hopefully this has never happened to our listeners.
Right. We don't want to get caught in a lie.
Right. Yep. So I said, Oh, hi Michelle.
How are you feeling?
Right. And then I said, it's the weirdest thing I guess I feel better after all.
So after that back and forth, mmm.
Yeah. I guess I feel better right after all that.
Oh, I can't go out tonight.
You had told me you couldn't go You're not feeling well.
There was maybe there was some drama We don't know exactly all of the after all that there was before, right?
It just indicates something came we don't know what the all is what the all is yeah And then you're and then I said interesting, of course, I guess you should get home though You're still probably carrying germs after all to jump, and then you look right at the mutual friend or the other friend.
I got back at you here a little bit.
Yeah. You're kind of twisting a little knife, like your.
Yeah. Um, so exactly.
So, right, and the other friend will maybe think, wait, what?
Yeah, what do you mean?
You're sick. What do you mean?
You have germs, right?
Yeah. Yeah. Awkward situations.
Yeah, you can use this is just very versatile.
You really, I don't think that is something that you just throw out, you know, all the time.
Definitely. Yeah, but it is very helpful for those those very specific times where you could use it.
Yeah. Yeah, I wouldn't say start saying it all the time, like a filler word, definitely don't do that.
But observe now for our listeners.
Guys, go and observe native speakers using this, and then start to fit it in.
when you're ready. Okay, and it's another route to connection just this is what we like to show you on this show.
All There's English 2369 is another episode to check out right now, transition to the truth with these four English words.
I love that title, by the way.
Fantastic! Yep, exactly.
So takeaway today is don't lie to your friends.
Yeah, don't lie to your friends, don't get caught lying to your friends.
I mean, not good, right.
That's bad bad bad feeling bad energy in the world You know, maybe call that friend invite them out.
You're feeling better.
Okay call that friend and go out together, right?
Yes Exactly. All right.
Yeah definitely give this a try and let us how it go know how it goes But don't force it I would say I love it.
Good stuff Michelle you have a good day and I'll see you very soon All right.
Bye Lindsay. Bye Thanks for listening to All Ears English.
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