This is an all ears English podcast episode 2271 happen to or happen with how to know the difference Welcome to the all ears English podcast Downloaded more than 200 million times.
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We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection not Perfection with your American host Aubrey Carter the IELTS whiz and Lindsey McMahon the English Adventurer coming to you from Arizona and Colorado USA To get real -time transcripts right on your phone and create your personalized
vocabulary list Try the all ears English app for iOS and Android start your seven day free trial at all ears English .com forward slash app Happen to and happen with can be tricky They have different meanings but can at times be interchangeable Listen in for the subtle details and Examples so you can use
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that's all ears English calm slash letter B number two Hello Aubrey, how's it going today?
How you doing? I'm great Lindsay.
How are you? I'm feeling good Hey Aubrey.
Has anything strange happened to you lately?
Hmm straight. Yeah, the other night I woke up in the middle of the night because I heard someone come in it was like 4 a .m And usually we're all like asleep No one's usually getting home at 4 a .m.
And I know the door opened someone come in so that was strange My daughter totally broke curfew and came home late 4 a .m.
She's 18 now. So it's a little tricky.
It's like should she have a curfew?
Wow Okay. Yeah, if my door opened at 4 a .m.
I'd be freaking out because they're a burglar what's going on exactly, right panicked Okay, so that happened to you interesting.
So we are starting today's episode with a great question, right?
Yeah, you asked something Strange that happened to me lately and we got a great question about happen to versus happen with can you use?
This is from Mateus from Brazil.
So Mateus says hey there.
I have a question for you.
When do I use happen to?
Versus happen with I love the show and I've been listening since 2020 amazing.
Yes. I love that. I've been listening for four years long time and such a great question because This is a little tricky right?
They are definitely different Yeah And this is one of those that's bringing you to that 99 % when you know the difference and can use these correctly and I also think this is gonna be very important because there are a lot of Mistranslations where people will translate especially from Spanish maybe French
I remember hearing that from Spanish speakers when I traveled around South America Incorrectly translating it right?
Yes, right when it comes to prepositions like that.
They work differently in other languages So if you're trying to translate directly, you're often going to use the wrong preposition We are going to dive into each of them give you lots of examples.
So, you know, which one to use when yeah That's why we're doing a series right Aubrey.
So Yeah, it's about our series here and what our listeners should do to make sure they don't miss a single part of this series Yeah, yes, there's a lot with happen as I started planning this So we're going to do part two on business English Because there are phrases with happen that are perfect to show
understanding after an apology like happens to the best of us accidents happen, but you sort of have to be careful about Not minimizing something that's bigger especially at work.
So follow business English to get part two.
That's gonna be a good one I'm excited for that one.
So yeah And then part three will be over on IELTS energy, right guys We'll show you how to improve your pronunciation and to not be monotone, which really tanks your score Doesn't that and there's a phrase with happens that's perfect to say it just so happens So whether you're studying for IELTS or not go
and check out make sure you're following IELTS energy So you can get this really fun breakdown of that phrase Excellent.
So guys open your search bar now find business English hit follow then find IELTS energy hit follow So you'll be ready for parts two and three.
Yeah. Awesome. Yes.
Okay. Let's dive in We're first going to talk about happen to Lindsay.
When do we use happen to?
Okay So this is when things happen to like they occur to a specific person a group or a thing Okay Exactly.
So for example what happened to your sister?
I saw her crying right?
This means some kind of specific action or event happened to her Mmm, or what happened to you?
Maybe you didn't show up, right?
That could be that could be true too, right?
You don't show up at a meeting or something.
What happened to you?
Did something happen?
Did something go wrong?
Right? I'll break this is often our question if it's general We don't know why someone was late or something something's happened We should be like what happened to you and then they're going to give the details there whether it's that they were late or whatever Happened and this is where I've seen
the mystery. This is quite subtle today the difference here This is where I've seen the mistranslation among specifically Spanish speakers For example, if I'm looking sad, I've heard someone say to me what happened with you, right?
And what they should have said was what happened to you?
I think But it's such a subtle.
It's almost not even a mistake right because it's so subtle It is subtle and we're going to dive into this with happen with a little more But I've also heard someone say what's happening with you when what they mean is what happened to you?
And there's some nuance here.
If you say what's happening with you?
There's almost some like judgment that There's something wrong with your behavior when you okay?
Yes, but I think with you broadly the broad strokes of today's episode are happened to Tend to be about a person right a group or a thing is that right?
And then we move in to happen with is more about an event a situation is that right?
Actually, yeah happened with is more or more general more overarching some kind of situation or event So if you ask someone what's happening with you?
Yeah, we're asking about their overall situation or event and it's sort of Implying that something has gone really wrong So we have to be careful because we might ask that and accidentally imply something we don't mean to oh my gosh This is extremely high level today because if I think about saying
what's happening to you It's also kind of searing because it seems like there's something going wrong with the person exactly they're getting sick or something's going on So wow, let's dig into happen with and maybe we can yeah kind of pull out the differences here Yeah, so just one last quick note
about happened to and this is very related to both of them, right?
It is like you said, it's sort of less It's sort of more trivial right things that are yeah, not such a big deal.
This has happened to me I got to tell you what happened to my phone and I'm just gonna share maybe I dropped it on a rock, right?
Whereas now that we're going in to happen with it's a little heavier because it's about bigger things Mm -hmm.
Okay, we're going into bigger things then.
All right, so referring to a situation or an event and something big for example Aubrey Yeah, I might say what happened with Olympic gymnastics yesterday.
Maybe I've heard some buzz, right?
I saw some picture someone was injured something pretty big if I'm saying like what happened with that yesterday There's some kind of big event or situation that clearly happened.
Okay, or if your local coffee shop closes, so sad I hope it doesn't happen to you, right?
Do you know what happened with the coffee shop on the corner?
I saw that it closed Yes, and when you're asking this right you're sort of asking do you know the overall situation?
I'm not asking about like one specific event that happened like what happened to that company would be so much more Would be strange to ask someone who probably also doesn't know much about it So instead we use this sort of overarching general what happened with that?
Why did they close?
Ah, okay So broad right more overarching.
I like that. What else do we need to know here?
Yeah so when it comes to asking about a person we might say what happened with so -and -so what's happening with a person but in that Case we are asking about an event or situation they're dealing with and so that's where we might accidentally imply that someone's dealing with A big situation or event
if we say what's happening with you but we might say like what happened with your boyfriend if Right, we have some reason to believe that they're going through some kind of big situation.
Wow. Okay. This is extremely subtle All right.
We'll take a quick break and then we'll come back.
We'll look at the difference in some role plays guys.
All right Okay, Aubrey, let's dive into some role plays and see if we can continue to really find those differences here So perfect so you and I are high school classmates in this role play.
I have turned back time We're quite young in this role.
Just five years back right Yeah Good.
All right. I'm ready.
I'm ready. Did you hear what happened to Josh?
No, what happened? I guess he got cheating got caught cheating on the exam I don't know what's happening with him.
That doesn't seem like him.
Oh, wow. That's crazy Well, maybe he didn't actually do it though.
You know what happened to me once I was accused of cheating when I didn't oh No, what is happening with teachers?
That would be awful to be accused of something you didn't do Okay, so let's really dive into this here for our listeners to clear any confusion.
Yeah. Yeah We can show you why we used each one So first I said did you hear what happened to Josh and I am talking about a very specific Something that happened to him, right?
I'm not asking about this sort of overall event or situation that he might be dealing with right here I'm talking about a specific instance and it's also a feeling what happened to Josh feels like something was done to him Yeah, that's a good thing, too, right?
I think that's one of the key differences what happened to you Something happened something occurred and was done kind of like against him almost that's true.
Cuz I wouldn't say did you hear what happened to Josh?
He dropped his cell phone.
No that didn't happen to him.
That's something he did what happened I think you're exactly right.
We say happened to when something was sort of done to him Yeah, so maybe that's another guideline that we want to make sure our listeners know is it more passive or Is it more of an active thing going on?
So let's check that out.
Let's keep going. So I said no what happened Okay, so there we don't have to worry about with or to right right and there's a Small thing to point out here It sort of would be strange because it's repetitive if you said no what happened to Josh Right because I've already said that we know who we're
talking about. So we would just say oh what happened I suppose you could say no what happened to him.
That would be okay Yeah, you're using a pronoun there so it's not a repeating the name at least know what happened to him or no I think it's good to go by the rule of we're a little lazy sometimes So we say as few words as we need to as we can possibly we might even just say no what?
Yeah No, what was it right right and then let's get into it.
So you said I guess he was caught cheating on the exam I don't know what's happening with him.
That doesn't seem like him now.
You're talking about maybe he's going through some kind of change Exactly.
I wouldn't say I don't know what's happened to him because I'm not talking about a single instance a single Event here now.
I'm talking about the situation in general.
What's happening with him?
Like what is his deal?
What is his situation?
Why would he do something like that?
And also going back to the theory of it's something coming at us Versus something we're creating maybe that follows that same theory.
I don't know what's happening with him That makes me think he's playing a part in the change Potential right right here.
I'm yeah if that's the case like this was you know something that he chose to do So I don't know what's happening with him.
What's the situation?
And then the next one shows the exact opposite, right?
You know what happened to me once I was accused of cheating when I actually didn't cheat So that was something outside that happened to you almost like you were a victim of that.
Yes. Yeah, so you're sort of Sharing you have this in common this happened to him similar to what happened to me.
It was out of my control It wasn't my fault.
It was more like an outside situation Mmm, I think that's a good differentiator right there, right?
Who's in control who's taking part in this change?
Right and the last one Aubrey and I said what is happening with teachers and this we do often where we're talking about a very general Situation whatever it is.
So here if I feel like you were Accused wrongly and then our other friend was accused wrongly now.
I'm applying it to the whole in general Right.
What is happening with teachers accusing students of things they didn't do Exactly.
So that implies the teachers themselves are kind of playing a part in this change They're starting to become more sinister or something, right?
Versus what if go ahead go ahead.
No, go ahead versus what what if I said what is happening to teachers?
Well, it feels different almost like someone is going after the teachers Do yes, that would be very different because that may be you're coming from thinking the administration Is cracking down on teachers.
So what is happening to teachers?
What is being done to them to make them make these choices?
Yeah, I feel like that's kind of the main difference It's like something from the outside is coming to you versus you're playing a part in what's going on.
Does that feel yeah No, I think you're exactly right And I feel like this last the sentence in the roleplay here is how we use happening with the most yeah when we're either Trying to not give an excuse for someone show understanding We're trying to show understanding for something that's going on We'll
be like what is happening with people these days or what is happening with teenagers?
We're having we have this solidarity of like I'm sort of blaming the situation in general and taking the blame off of a person Totally and then sometimes just for another example, it could be pretty interchangeable.
Like what's the difference right now Aubrey?
We know we're in a very heated political moment very divide.
We're becoming a very divided country So if I said what's happening to our country?
Versus what's happening with our country you're kind of saying the same thing Yes And that's what really makes happen to and happen with tricky is that sometimes they do have quite a different meaning one is top It's more overarching about an event and sometimes they are a little more interchangeable
Because in both of those cases you're you're talking about the situation in general But because you're not talking about a person and you're talking about something bigger in this case the country both work, right?
What's happening to companies these days?
What's happening with companies what's happening with the country or to the country?
They're all sort of overarching because we're not talking about an individual But in a way we are talking about each person is creating the division.
That's why the width also works, right?
It's like we're the victims of the division and we're creating the division in a sense So that's why the two and the with do work in that scenario Super interesting because if you do make it more specific to individuals if you say like what's happening to Americans Instead of what's happening with Americans
then it feels more accusatory like what are the Americans doing to ruin their country, right?
Interesting how sort of the more broad you make it the more interchangeable they are.
Oh, wow I feel like we did a follow -up.
We do have a follow -up coming in part 3 But we may have to revisit this again We'll come back to it really big interesting subtle topic perfect for all using English listeners at their level operate Yes, there's a lot here, right?
These are both really useful chunks whether you're telling stories or describing events and there is enough nuance here that you might be Implying something you don't mean to if you use exactly but sometimes they are interchangeable.
So very tricky. Oh, I love it It's so good.
All right. Thanks for bringing this challenging topic today to our listeners guys If you didn't understand something today or if you have a follow -up question around this topic or other subtle differences in grammar Let us know right send in your question to support at allersenglish .com.
We'll make sure it gets on our list Yes, awesome the more specific the better.
Yeah for sure, Aubrey Thanks for being on the show today guys Go check out those other podcasts to make sure you don't miss parts two and three awesome.
Thanks Lindsay. Take care.
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