This is an All Ears English podcast episode 2129.
This is an amazing episode, right?
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We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection, not perfection, with your American host, Aubrey Carter, the IELTS whiz, and Lindsay McMahon, the English adventurer coming to you from Arizona and Colorado, USA.
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Do you know how to use right and don't you, at the end of a sentence, to look for agreement or check on someone's preferences?
Today we answer a listener question, plus learn about culture, intonation, and more.
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B-L-A-C-K-F-R-I-D-A-Y.
Hey Aubrey, I have a question for you here.
Actually, we should ask our listeners this question, don't you think?
Yes, actually, but go ahead and you can stand in for our listeners and ask.
Okay.
So do you, I'll ask you about what you say.
So do you think there's anything that you say a lot on the podcast?
Any language habits?
Yes, absolutely.
And I have had students point this out to me.
Listeners point this out to me.
And I noticed that when I look through the transcripts too, when we're creating the transcripts, I say right, a lot.
I'll be like, oh, that was really interesting.
Right.
And a lot of sentences with right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Interesting.
Okay.
Yeah.
I think that's true.
I do this.
I do something similar.
I do.
I, but I think I say like, right.
Like I don't even say the word.
Yeah.
Yes, and there's a reason we say this a lot.
A lot of native speakers say right, and there are some other phrases like this.
We got a really good question about this from a listener, and so this is going to be interesting today.
I love language habits.
It's fascinating.
Michelle and I were talking earlier in the week and we thought that it would be really cool this year, to celebrate our 10th anniversary, to make t-shirts that each of us has a saying something we say all the time on the show um, and then we have those on a t-shirt.
That would be super, shells would be light, mine would be right, michelle's would be.
I feel funny, so you.
But because yeah, you need to record with michelle sometimes, so she says a lot.
I feel funny, or do you feel funny?
Anyways, i think it would be funny.
That would be good.
I'd wear that shirt.
I feel funny Yeah yeah, yeah.
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And if you believe in that, then, you know, this is our value.
We show you how to use English, not just to get the right grammar, but to connect.
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That's what we want.
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Hit follow on the show.
Aubrey, would you read the question from Rio?
Yes, this is from Rio in Japan.
Thank you guys for podcasting about awesome phrases and cool cultural differences.
I wanted to ask you about the difference between don't you and right.
I think I know how to use these words.
Like you have a license, do you?
Or it's cool, right?
Something like that.
But are there any specific situations where native speakers would prefer to use one or the other?
Thank you, Rio.
Such a great question.
Yeah, really good question.
Oh my gosh.
So where do we start today?
We're going to answer Rio's question and where should we go today?
This yeah, so we do.
We use both of these a lot.
Right, and don't you to ask people about themselves to get them to give their opinions or to kind of see if they agree?
But they're sort of fillers often right, just kind of um yeah exactly, i do it all the time it's.
It's great for connection.
It keeps you from having these sort of awkward silences and pauses.
There are a lot of fillers like this in english, so it's going to happen.
Don't let it keep you from connecting.
Being worried about making fillers like this.
Oh my gosh.
As human beings.
In conversation, we are looking for agreement, whether we're conscious of it or not, right?
It's evolutionary.
I mean, it's how we stayed alive historically, right?
Yes, I'm saying it a lot.
I'm saying a lot.
It's interesting.
When I lived in Japan, I heard a lot of this.
And as far as I understand, the equivalent is desnei. or ne at the end of the sentence.
And I was just watching the movie on my flight back from Portugal, Lost in Translation.
Have you seen it?
Yes.
It's been a long time, but I remember enjoying it.
And I remembered how common it was to hear ne at the end of sentences in Japanese.
And so we do this across many languages.
Have you seen this in any languages you've studied?
Yes, when I lived in Quebec, I had learned French in Belgium and France.
And then in Quebec, they have sort of their own regional dialect of French.
And they add le at the end.
So it's like, c'est le.
I mean, it's like, you know, right?
And you won't hear it in France or Belgium, but all over in Quebec.
And it's sort of like the A in Canada.
Oh, interesting.
Huh.
Yeah.
I wonder if there was an influence.
Yeah.
If they're mirroring A, but just in French, that's fascinating.
Whereas in Europe, you don't hear that as much.
That's really interesting.
I think there are quite a few things in the sort of Quebecois that it's coming from how Canadians speak, because most of them are fluent in English and French.
So it gets sort of blended.
It's really fascinating.
That is fascinating.
I love that.
All right.
So let's dig into it then.
Where can we start?
Yeah, let's start with write.
But first, we want to make sure you guys don't miss episode 2114.
Scroll up if you missed this.
Lindsay and Michelle recorded this about the phrase wouldn't be caught dead, and a few others like that.
It was called how to use a strong idiom to share your identity in English.
That was a fantastic episode.
I want to make sure nobody missed it.
Oh, yeah, that was fun.
And we have to be able to say what we like to do, what we wouldn't be caught dead doing.
So check that out, guys.
So this is definitely something you'd add right at the end too, right?
I wouldn't be caught dead doing that, right?
You wouldn't be caught dead, right?
You can really add it to anything.
I mean, that's why we're talking about this today and answering your question.
It's everywhere.
So, starting with right yes yeah, so this is when you're asking a question and you know the answer.
Like we said, it's conversational.
Often it's used to sort of pass the floor to someone, so that's why we say it a lot podcasting, because I've said something and I'm sort of like handing the floor handing, you know, it over to Lindsay, and that's a way that I often do it.
That's actually kind of interesting, an interesting point because know, sometimes we're not face to face and i wonder if we would use right less if we were face to face, that we just see the cues more easily and i would know you're about to speak.
Yeah, i know that i say it a lot less in casual conversation than i do podcasting, so i pulled these out of the transcripts um, a couple that lindsay said to michelle, you took your son to paris, right?
And then you said oh yeah, it's super common to me online nowadays, right?
And both of those, you were sort of passing the conversation back to Michelle.
And then there's one that I said, you want to share that one?
And you said, this grammar is a little tricky, right?
Looking for agreement there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So you're sort of looking for agreement and also letting them know like I've finished what I'm going to say.
You take over.
Right.
So some of this is a tactic of podcasting online and actually not totally inapplicable to our listeners web conferences, right.
Professional meetings.
If you work remotely, this is going to be key.
Phone calls.
Huge.
So listen in today.
Don't think, oh, this is just for podcasters.
No, no, no.
This is English for business, actually.
Yeah.
Yes.
And then we use this a second way to make a statement agreeing.
So we'll show this in a little mini role play here.
Lindsay, start us out.
Ice cream is the best, right?
Okay.
So this, instead of adding it to what I'm saying, it's just a statement agreeing with emphasis.
Yeah, that one deserves its own episode.
That's kind of a trendy thing that people have been saying in the last few years, right?
Or you'll say, I know, right?
I know, right?
I don't say that very much, but people do say it.
It's very trendy.
It might be going out now.
I feel like I haven't heard it lately.
But in the last four or five years, yes, 100% natives definitely say this, at least in the US.
Yes, for sure.
I think it was super trendy.
And I probably should stop saying it if it's going out.
I don't know.
No, I'm just saying that.
I was just thinking because I haven't heard it lately.
But maybe I just haven't talked to anyone lately.
All right.
All right.
Here we go, Aubrey.
Let's move into the next one.
What's next?
Yes.
So this next one is don't you.
We use it two different ways.
First is to say something about yourself and sort of ask if someone agrees when you expect them to say yes.
So give us an example.
Okay.
I love ice cream.
Don't you?
Yes.
Or I love this weather.
Don't you?
And really you're just making a statement.
I love this weather, and sort of opening the conversation to them because you're expecting them to say yes right right okay yeah, a little, maybe i use this, probably.
Well, what do you think?
Do you use this sometimes, don't you?
Don't you like looking for agreement?
Would you say yeah, i do, i do say that sometimes.
I hear it in conversations.
Right, if you just maybe a way to start a conversation, if you run into someone like yeah, i love this type of weather, don't you like?
I feel is very natural, really natural.
And then this next one is really interesting because the intonation is going to switch.
Okay,
So listen for the intonation.
Here in this second example, we're making an assumption about someone else.
So, Aubrey, you exercise a lot, don't you?
Exactly.
Or you like chocolate, don't you?
So this is where we don't know.
We don't know if the answer is yes, right?
We're making an assumption.
We think it's probably true.
Maybe we heard this, but we're not sure.
And the intonation is very different.
Yeah.
Let's go back and actually compare ice cream and exercise and show our listeners the.
The intonation change again.
So love it again when it's something about yourself you're asking for to see if they agree.
Hey Aubrey, I love ice cream, don't you right?
Or I love this weather, don't you?
You can see how it's sort of the the intonation is assumption, like I'm assuming you're gonna say, of course everyone loves this weather, right versus now we're making an assumption about someone else and we're just kind of confirming right, so opera, you exercise.
Sorry, say that again when we said yeah, confirming what we assume to be true, affirming what we assume.
So, for example, you exercise a lot, a lot, don't you right?
Not, don't you?
It's don't you.
So the emphasis is on don't Exactly.
Yes.
And it really changes the whole meaning depending on that little bit of intonation change.
So this is really vital or you like chocolate, don't you?
It's the intonation is I feel like I remember this about you.
Is that accurate?
Right versus I like chocolate, don't you?
So hopefully we're making this note or on you.
Yeah, really interesting.
So guys, if you didn't quite catch that or if you need a review on that, go back at the end of today's episode and listen again, because it's kind of important, actually quite important, to do the correct emphasis on each of those examples.
Yeah, absolutely.
Let's show this again in a roleplay here.
So you and I just ran into each other at a grocery store in this roleplay.
Lindsay, you want to start us out?
Okay, here we go.
Hey, you live, you live close to here, right?
Yes, just up the street.
I love this store, don't you?
Oh, yeah.
They have the best sales here.
Right?
I know, right?
There it is.
There it is.
I love it.
I don't know if it's out of style.
You have to ask your kids, because I feel like kids, teenagers are the ones who know what's in style and what's not right.
That's true.
They haven't started telling me, mom, stop saying that.
Oh, no, that hasn't started yet?
Okay, interesting.
Interesting, um.
So first i said you live close to here right right okay straightforward, yep.
And this, it's similar, the intonation for right and don't you there, because you could definitely say, like you live close to here, don't you?
Like you're, you're pretty sure that's right, right.
So the intonation's interesting here, right.
And then i just said yes, just up the street and this is something that i'm this is more like a general assumption.
Like everybody loves this store, i love this store, don't you Looking for that agreement?
You'd be like, no, I hate this store.
You're just, even if you hate the store, you would be like, yeah, sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's good.
It's good.
Totally.
And this is usually about preferences, right?
Again, that's the ice cream example.
I love chocolate ice cream.
Don't you?
Right.
And then I said, oh yeah, they have the best sales here.
And I just finished with that, right?
Or you could say, I know, right?
And it's just a fun way to agree with emphasis.
It's just fun.
It's fun and trendy.
I like that.
This has been a good episode.
We talked about intonation.
We talked about vocabulary.
We talked about culture a little bit.
What's the takeaway?
Yeah, we use both of these phrases to ask people about themselves and their opinions.
So this is such a great connection skill because this is how you get deeper with people, right?
Ask about them. ask if they like something that you like.
And it's always a great jumping off point for a conversation.
Exactly.
Curiosity.
You should be curious about the people you're getting to know.
Do they like ice cream?
Do they like that store?
Get to know, dig in and enjoy that connection.
Yeah.
Yes, absolutely.
Oh, this is really fun.
I'll probably start noticing even more now when I read the transcription, I see my rights.
No question.
No question.
Have a good day, Aubrey.
I'll talk to you soon.
You too.
See you next time.
Bye.
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