This is an All Ears English podcast episode 2105.
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Hey, Lindsay, how are you?
Hey, Misha.
I'm feeling good today.
How are you?
I'm podcasting today from the lovely city of Pittsburgh Pennsylvania, which I've never been to before.
So very excited.
How is it there?
I've never been either.
Well, I'm going to go exploring tonight.
So I haven't had much of a chance to see it.
But so far, it seems very cool.
I've heard it's pretty small, but it's kind of an up and coming city.
You know what I mean?
You see a lot of old kind of mid-century modern houses combined with new builds.
So you can tell there's a lot of development going on in Pittsburgh.
Oh wow yeah, i have a friend there.
I've always been.
I've always kind of wanted to go, so you'll have to let me know.
Yeah, for sure, they have some really wild, uh like local foods.
Like apparently they like to put french fries on top of everything, like salad sandwiches in the sandwich, so i'm gonna try some of that tonight.
Oh, that's well, that sounds delicious.
Yeah well um, today we are going to talk about how to ask someone for help.
Maybe yeah, maybe you've had to ask someone for help recently, someone to do you a favor uh, so we're going to talk about different ways to do that, because that is a huge connection skill.
That's a great skill.
I'll just start off with a quick question conversation.
Question Michelle do you find it easy to ask people for help?
I struggle sometimes for the bigger things in life like, sometimes I struggle asking for help.
Do you have a problem with that, or is it pretty easy for you to ask for help?
Would you say?
That's a good question.
I think I'm okay with it.
Actually yeah, it doesn't pop up in my mind as something that's like a challenge for me.
Yeah, so No, I think I'm good with it.
That's good, Michelle.
That's good.
I think in our culture some people get the message of like you should be able to do it by yourself independence.
I think I got that somewhere.
And so it's something I'm working on in my own development.
Yeah.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Interesting.
Yeah.
So we're going to talk more about doing that today, Lindsay.
Maybe you'll get a few ideas.
Yeah.
I get more comfortable with it.
But before we get into it, guys, we have this great app.
If you don't already have it, it's on iOS and Android.
And it's the All Ears English app.
It's amazing.
What are some of the things you can do on this app?
Well, what listeners love the most about our app is to be able to see the transcripts guys right there inside the app.
You see it right in the app.
As you're listening, you see every word we say, which is just amazing.
You can't get that anywhere else.
And it also highlights key vocab words that you can tap on and save in your personal powerless.
So Michelle, where can they go to get that app and get a premium subscription and a free trial?
Go on over to allearsenglish.com slash app.
Love it.
Love it.
All right.
Let's get into today's topic, Michelle.
Where shall we start off today?
Okay.
Well, so guys asking for help, this could be for anything.
I mean, it could be for work, with friends or family, whatever it is.
Like, What is something you might usually need help with?
Like for me, technology.
Something with my kids, things like that.
What do you usually want to ask for help with?
Well, this year I've needed a lot of help.
I mean.
One idea that comes to mind is we sold my aunt's house in California, and I've never sold a house before.
So I needed help from my father and mother-in-law who are in that industry in California.
I needed their help with reading the contract, signing the contract, pricing the house.
All these things I had never done before.
I really needed help with that, Michelle.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, that's good.
I'm glad that you were able to get help from family.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
So one expression that we can teach before we really get into the other ones is lighten your load.
I love that.
Right?
So sometimes if you need someone... What does that mean to lighten someone's load?
Yeah.
Sometimes people have a lot on their shoulders, right?
A lot on their plate.
They're carrying a lot.
They have just a lot of responsibilities.
So if you have a friend that you can lighten their load, maybe you take one thing off their plate.
Maybe you offer to drive their kid to school when you know they have a big presentation at work that day, for example.
Right?
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
So we want to help you lighten your load as far as grammar goes.
So you can listen to episode 2093. her and I or her and me, your grammar questions answered.
So here we are to help you guys with that.
Yeah Michelle, we've been digging with Aubrey, really digging into a lot of grammar this fall on All Ears English.
So guys, go back and make sure you've hit follow on this show to get more amazing grammar episodes and check those out to lighten your load.
That's right.
That's right.
Okay, so what is one... We're going to teach a few expressions.
So this one, I think you came up with this, Lindsay.
What is the first one?
I think this one is so fun and so cool.
The expression is, do me a solid.
Do me a solid.
Do me a solid.
It's so funny because what does that even mean?
It's just this chunk that means... But you would never say it in another way.
I don't think you would say like, I need a solid Lindsay.
No, you really can't do much.
Other than you may say like, he did me a solid, like he helped me out.
Right.
But it's always in like the dude or do, you know, someone, a solid.
It's never like, oh, can I ask you for a solid?
No, no, no, no, no.
Yeah.
To be honest, like I don't know where this comes from.
I haven't researched it.
All I know is that I heard it recently and not for the first time, of course.
I've heard it many times in English.
And when I hear...
I like it because you know again, we're coming from a culture that values independence and hard work, and do it by yourself.
Right.
I mean, we even teach our kids, tie your shoes all by yourself.
And so when we can talk about helping someone out and then say it in a casual way, it takes a little bit of pressure off in my mind.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I like this one too.
It sounds cool and... It sounds cool.
Fun.
Yeah.
Fun and cool.
Sure.
So for... Yeah.
Fun and cool.
So for example, Lindsay, what's an example here of do me a solid?
All right.
So you could say, could you do me a solid and pick up some bread for the dinner party?
Nice.
Yeah.
It really could be for any... Obviously, for huge things, it's a little less useful.
Right, Michelle?
Like, I don't know...
What would be something that might be a little too serious for this, Michelle?
Would you say... Like, can you do me a solid and drive me to the hospital?
Yeah.
Maybe in an emergency situation, it's not the right moment for a fun expression like that.
It's like, oh my God, I need your help.
Can you drive us to the hospital?
Right.
Right.
Right.
This is kind of for the more casual things.
I mean it could be.
I mean something real like, but yeah, not something an emergency situation like that, where something is very serious.
That's true Michelle, because I think in those situations you just communicate as directly as possible.
Right.
Yes.
And on the casual train here, Michelle, we have another one, right?
Yeah.
So this one is help me out.
So to help someone out.
So I could say, if you could help me out with the invitations, that would be great.
Also on the casual side of things, not quite as slangy as do me a solid, right?
Do me a solid is like the most slangy thing.
But also very casual.
Hey, could you help me out?
Now, Michelle, what's the difference between help me out and help me?
Um, I think that's a good question.
I think help me out makes it slightly more casual.
I agree.
Yeah, I think that's what it is.
Oh, good.
Yeah.
I mean, I'm not the ultimately correct person, right?
I don't know.
But that's how it sounds to me.
Like if I said, could you help me with the invitations?
Like, yeah, that's fine.
But help me out.
It's just adding a little more casualness to it, I think.
Yeah, friendliness, casualness, making a little more like not so direct, maybe.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So a lot of times when we do make something a phrasal verb, it does make it a little bit more casual.
When that additional preposition doesn't change the meaning entirely, it just softens, it makes it a little more conversational.
Yeah.
Right.
It flows a little better.
Yeah.
I like it.
So what else?
Well, then we have one more that we're going to go with.
So this one is lend me a hand.
And I was just thinking we could do a follow up on some more formal expressions, because I think yeah, these are definitely a little bit more casual and there are more formal ways to ask.
So we could do a follow up on that as well.
But today we're sticking to the casual.
Yeah, I love it.
So for example, guys, write this one down.
Can you lend me a hand with these boxes?
Yeah, I like that idea Michelle, of getting a little more formal in a different episode another time.
Yeah.
Oh, actually, we do have one more.
So we'll get to that in a second.
Okay.
All right, Michelle.
Last one for today.
What is it?
And then we're going to show our listeners a role play.
Yeah, this one is do me a favor.
Now would you say I think favor is like a little bit more formal, because we were talking about this construction of do me a, I think um, like solid, and favor.
I think favor it might be more common.
Yeah, for sure, i think.
Yeah, maybe i don't know if it's necessarily more formal, but i i think in general yeah yeah, i would say it's much more, much more common do me a favor than do me a solid um, you know, for example, i don't picture like a grandmother using do me a solid.
I just feel like it's kind of young, kind of slangy.
But yeah, I could imagine a grandmother saying do me a favor, right?
Yeah, I think do me a favor is like a really good one for everyone.
For everyone.
It's much more mainstream, I would say.
Yeah.
So how do we say that?
Well, you could say, do me a favor, keep track of our expenses on the trip.
That's interesting.
You said just do me a favor dash, keep track of our expenses on the trip.
It's kind of a command in a way.
Yeah, it's a.
It's a little different.
I wanted to to use it in a little bit of a different way.
I could say um, could you do me a favor and keep track of our expenses on the trip?
But i just said do me a favor right, Yeah.
Or as a third option, you could say, do me a favor and keep track of our expenses on the trip.
So that's instead of having the could you, but you do have the and.
So you have a lot of options today, guys.
That's why we really want to be listening in the app today to see the three options written out in our transcripts.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Definitely.
Definitely.
So yeah, I mean, we kind of talked about how these are similar or different from each other.
I think it also depends how you ask, if you say can or if you say could.
There's a lot of different ways that you could play with this to see how it feels.
I think it also depends how comfortable are you with the person.
And then Lindsay brought up such an important point as to...
How formal is it?
But also, what is the degree of help you need?
Is it an emergency?
Is it just a light question?
These are things that we have to think about.
Oh my gosh, it really matters.
It really matters.
Yeah.
How serious is the situation?
How urgent is the situation?
These all dictate our word choice, Michelle.
But you do have a lot of choices, guys, when it comes to asking for help.
Yeah.
I would say if you were to choose one of these for like more of an emergency situation, what would you choose?
Like, for example, if someone needed a ride to the emergency room, that kind of thing.
Okay.
Help me out.
Would you help me out and drive me to the ER?
Right?
Yeah.
Or I would... Or like, guys, if you really need someone's help, you just be direct.
Just say, I need your help.
I love that.
I love that.
So, you know, I agree with you.
I think help... just the word help guys, that's what, that's what this is all about.
So you got to be direct in those situations.
So you could say, um, could you help me or, or I need your help.
Right.
Yeah.
I think, I think I need to go to the emergency room.
Yeah.
Like you said Michelle, I think we really need another episode here with more serious, more urgent requests.
Yeah.
Right.
Cause if you do me a solid, take me to the ER person might say, Oh, it doesn't really matter.
Okay.
Maybe we can just, you know, make you an appointment for next Friday.
Right.
Right.
It might not seem as urgent, right?
Exactly.
Exactly.
It's all about the words we choose.
So good.
What else, Michelle?
All right.
Well, so should we do a role play to see how this all fits together?
Yeah.
So here we are friends and we're setting up for a surprise party.
Nice.
Here we go.
I can't wait to see Milo's face when he comes in.
Same.
Do me a favor.
Put the veggie tray on the other table.
Sure.
Oh, can you lend me a hand with the streamers?
Yep.
Ah, I can't reach.
Help me out.
Here you go.
Thanks.
Oh, and do me a solid.
Don't text him until 3.55.
We don't want him to arrive early.
You got it.
All right.
So this is a very non-emergency situation.
Right, Michelle.
Yes.
Surprise party.
Do you like surprise parties?
Has anyone ever thrown you a surprise party?
Yeah.
When I was a teenager, my best friend Emma did.
She threw me a surprise party when I was like 14, but not in my adult life.
Yeah.
What about you, Michelle?
Do you like surprise parties?
Yeah.
Once Dan threw me like a small... It was maybe like 10 friends that are like a hamachi restaurant.
That's awesome.
Yeah.
So that was fun.
But yeah, it's always fun.
I think it's fun to be a part of creating the surprise and like making up what is the story.
And like we always tell my dad, we threw my dad when he turned 50, a surprise party.
And one of the reasons reasons I think he kind of figured it out was because we made a story that like, my brother was gonna pick me up early from something, but it was early in the morning and so then we I don't know as part of the story, and he thought my brother's Adam and he thought Adam would never wake up early in the morning to pick up Michelle's.
We knew that there was something wrong.
That's funny.
Yeah, you have to be really careful.
Most of the time, people do figure out surprises, right?
They do.
Yeah.
They uncover it beforehand.
But anyways, it's a nice effort to put in for people you love.
I think.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It is.
It's fun.
So let's go through this.
So I said, do me a favor.
Right.
And so I didn't say, can you do me a favor?
It sounds like, you know, we're just like kind of like quick zipping back and forth.
Like, oh, do me a favor.
We're helping each other out.
So it's not like I'm commanding you just because I'm saying it in this way.
Right.
And also this is great for a casual situation, because we're not even looking at each other face to face.
You're hanging the streamers.
I'm putting the veggies on the table.
We're kind of collaborating in parallel, but we're not sitting and having a full conversation.
So it's quick things like, hey, do me a favor.
Hey, lend me a hand.
Help me out.
Do me a solid.
It's not complete sentences or anything happening here.
Right.
Right.
So you don't have to worry here about sounding like you're giving big orders or anything like that.
It's just as quick and zippy back and forth.
We're working on stuff.
So don't worry about that.
I love it.
What's the next one?
All right.
So yeah, you said, do me a favor, put the veggies on the tray.
And then, oh, can you lend me a hand with the streamers?
Very common.
Yep.
All right.
So maybe that means that you're physically going to, You're not going to do the streamers yourself.
We're going to do them together.
Right, right, right, right, right.
But then I have trouble reaching because I'm short.
Maybe I'm on a chair or whatever.
And I say, I can't reach.
Help me out.
Right.
And then I help you.
And then I say, oh, and do me a solid.
Don't text until...
355 right, and i would say, if you're going to use this very, very slangy expression, do me a solid.
Use it rarely, right?
Rarely.
Be selective about how often you use it.
It could get annoying to people if you use it too much.
I think what do you think?
And i agree, you don't want to do me a solid, do me a solid.
It's one of those ones that are just gonna sound overdone.
You know, because it is yeah, because it's unique, because it's a little bit more unique when you use the more unique expressions too frequently, I think that's when it sounds a little funny, whereas maybe the other ones
Yeah.
But I did want to point something out that I noticed.
So we talked about help me being more for like the urgent situations.
Right.
And even though this is not a serious situation, I feel like, you know, we're using it.
So I'm saying I can't reach.
So it was it's more urgent.
Like maybe I'm standing on top of a chair and I'm having trouble.
And here I use help me out.
Like if I said like, ah, I can't.
I can't reach.
Can you lend me a hand?
I mean, that's fine, too.
But like this one, I do think has more of a feeling of like, oh, I need your help right away.
Right.
Help me out.
I can't reach.
Maybe you're about to fall off of a ladder or something.
Right.
Right.
We don't want that.
So, yeah.
Yeah.
Very, very interesting.
Right.
Just this one topic, guys, in English of how to ask for help.
It's really important to know the nuances, the situation.
And again, we'll follow up with another episode on serious situations, directly asking for help.
I need your help.
I need to go to the ER, for example.
Michelle, what's the takeaway for today?
I think, you know, don't be afraid to ask for help.
I know it can be uncomfortable.
We gave you many different ways to say it. today.
And we really kind of isolated one way that's helped me as being a bit better for more urgent situations.
But I think we gave you a lot of expressions and different situations in which these might occur and how you can use them.
Yeah, I love it.
I love it.
Good stuff, guys.
Hit that follow button on All Ears English and we will see you on the next episode.
Michelle, have a good day.
Do me a solid and have a good day.
I love it.
All right.
Bye, Lindsay.
Good job.
Take care.
Bye.
Bye.
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