Gretchen, you and I both love Whole Foods Market.
It's fall.
I am trying to entertain more and I love to go to Whole Foods Market for entertaining or just for my everyday needs.
The 365 by Whole Foods Market brand always has great quality at great prices and Plus you can shop low-price everyday items in the store and online, with convenient pickup and seamless delivery.
Right.
It's the combination we all want, which is really good prices and also really good quality products.
They have hundreds of yellow low-price signs that make it easy to save without compromising the quality and ingredient standards that you expect from Whole Foods Market.
Yes.
Yes.
Gretchen, you know I'm not much of a chef, but I do know that when I go to Whole Foods I can figure out something good to offer my guests that I can be proud of.
Enjoy so many ways to save on cozy fall meals at Whole Foods Market.
I'm Gretchen Rubin, and this is A Little Happier.
It has occurred to me that, with the books, movies and TV shows that I truly love and read and reread, or watch and rewatch, they often include moments of transcendence when the most endearing and important values are invoked.
Even when a book or show or movie is lighthearted and even silly, if at some times it reaches those moments of transcendence, the experience is so much richer and can withstand repeated scrutiny.
I love the TV show Friends, which is no surprise because, although the NBC show aired from 1994 to 2004, it's still enormously popular.
I was thinking about whether Friends has these moments of transcendence.
For some reason, I've been thinking a lot about Friends lately, even though I haven't even been watching the show.
I should probably do a bit of reflection on that.
But anyway, I've seen the show many times, so I searched my memory to see if I could find examples.
And without much effort at all, I can easily think of many moments like this.
There's the scene in season three, episode nine, the one with the giant poking device, where roommates and best friends, Chandler and Joey, are talking about Chandler's relationship with Janice.
Chandler used to date Janice.
They broke up.
She got married.
Then she separated from her husband.
Chandler and Janice reconnected, and Chandler is deeply in love.
Then Janice tells him that she's confused.
She's in love with Chandler, but she's still in love with her husband, too.
Chandler is heartbroken.
He asks Joey, what would you do?
Joey says gently, if it was me, and this is just me, I would bow out.
They have a kid together, you know?
They're a family.
And if there's a chance, they can make that work.
I wouldn't want to be the guy who stood in the way of that.
And Chandler agrees.
I also thought of the episode called The One with the Morning After, season three, episode 16.
Ross was in love with Rachel from the time they were teenagers and at last she returned his feelings and they started dating.
And then after a fight, they decided to go on a break from their relationship.
She discovers that during that very short period, he had a one night stand with another woman.
Rachel is beside herself with fury and sorrow, and it seems to us, the viewers, like she's overreacting, perhaps given that they were famously on a break.
Then she explains why this incident is so devastating.
I used to think of you as somebody that would never, ever hurt me.
Ever, she explains.
And we understand the depths of her feelings, her love and trust for Ross and now how she feels that that has been lost forever.
There's the conversation between Monica and Richard.
They're very much in love, but Richard is much older and already has two children and doesn't want to raise any more.
He repeatedly explains to Monica that he doesn't want to have more kids, but she really does want kids.
And finally, he tells her, okay, I'll do it.
If kids is what it takes to be with you, then kids it is.
If I have to, I'll do it all again.
I don't want to lose you, so I have to do it all again, then I will.
Monica is desperately in love but she says I wanna have a baby, but I don't wanna have one with someone who doesn't really want to have one.
And they break up.
We understand that Monica wants to plan a future with someone who really wants the same things that she wants.
And then there's a season three, episode two, the one with Rachel's book.
Monica and Chandler are talking about their plans for their wedding.
Monica, who's always dreamed of a big wedding, has discovered that her parents spend the money they'd save for her wedding on a beach house, and she's deeply distraught.
Then she finds out how much money Chandler has saved up, and she's ecstatic.
It's just enough to pay for her dream wedding.
Chandler refuses.
He's been saving for six years for the future and doesn't want to spend all those savings on a party.
Monica is very upset and she's deeply hurt that Chandler doesn't care about how much she wants this wedding.
They fight, they apologize to each other, and each says that the other can have their way.
But as they're talking about it calmly and lovingly, Chandler describes how he's been thinking about having children and how many children they'd have and where they'd all live, and having a cat.
And Monica says, No, I don't want to have a big fancy wedding.
I want everything that you just said.
And they were able to reach true harmony by talking about what they truly valued most.
The stories that capture our attention and admiration most are often the ones that show true range.
Friends manages to be extremely funny and even slapsticky, and it also reaches a moment of transcendence in a way that strikes a true chord.
I'm Gretchen Rubin, and I hope this makes your week a little happier.
From the Onward Project.
Hi Gretchen, Craig Robinson and my little sister Michelle here.
We host a new podcast called IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson.
We know you're the queen of giving advice, so we wanted to get a few tips from you.
Gretchen, a lot of our listeners are going through some major life changes.
What advice do you have for folks who are trying to stay grounded in the midst of major life transitions?
Craig and Michelle, I am so happy to be talking to you.
Here are a few questions that might help us gain perspective.
So consider questions like this.
What activities take up my time but are not particularly useful or stimulating for me?
Do I spend a lot of time on something that's important to someone else but is not very important to me?
If I could magically change one habit in my life, what would I choose?
And here's a question.
Would I like to have more time in solitude restorative solitude or would I like to have more time with friends?
You know, just thinking about questions like this can help us start to figure out how we might make our lives happier.
With greater self-knowledge, we're better able to make hard decisions that reflect ourselves, our own nature, our own interests, our own values.
In my own case, I have found that the more my life reflects my nature, the happier I get and the more grounded I feel when I'm going through a period of major change or transition.
For more great advice, search for IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson wherever you get podcasts.
You can listen to Issa Rae on letting go of certain friendships, Kiki Palmer on why disappointment is actually the key to career success, Seth and Lauren Rogan on caring for aging parents, and so many more.
