What's your favorite rom-com?
Oh, I guess it's not really a rom-com.
What?
I was going to say The Notebook, but that's not comedy.
Wrong chicken chop date.
I forgot we're dating today, yeah?
This is a date, yeah.
Speed dating.
I guess it is a speed date.
It's quite quick.
Yeah, it's like half an hour.
And then you will leave.
Well, maybe.
Well, I might leave.
Don't leave.
I've got places to be.
Because that would be a first.
Well, have you never had someone leave a day early?
Me?
Yeah.
Come on.
Why is this green on your face?
Oh, sorry.
I'm just, like, been using a new foundation.
I feel like it's got rubbed in.
Is it not rubbed in properly?
I just, I thought it was, I just got it wrong, didn't I?
I mean, green suits.
Do you think?
Some of us.
Would you go to space?
No.
I don't like that.
I feel like I already gave Aileen .
So I kind of want to just do it here.
I have so many questions about being a comedy icon and creating so many comedy moments.
Should I send them two to four to Owen Wilson?
Yeah, you should probably do that.
Just give me your email address.
And Owen could then forward them to Will Ferrell.
I feel like all of the good guys are taken.
Are gay.
Or gay.
But there's not many gay good guys.
I keep dating gay men.
You do?
Yes, by accident.
Don't they know that you're a woman?
I can imagine you in Bridgerton.
Really?
Yeah.
Okay.
Do you want to be in it?
Oh, can you cast me in it?
Is that within your limit?
I obviously have no power over that whatsoever.
Yeah, but you can put a word in.
I can put a word in.
What would my character be like in Bridgerton?
She'd be... Uptight?
She'd be really uptight, yeah.
She'd be a sort of potential spinster, but... Potential spinster?
I heard you want six kids, is that right?
Yeah.
Well, you didn't want to check with me first?
Have you ever been ghosted?
No.
I thought you wouldn't have.
I mean, no.
Do you like dancing?
What do you mean do I like dancing?
I'm like a professional dancer.
Would you be up for doing like a dance class?
Together?
Yeah, sure.
Yeah, or on your own.
I want to start doing dancing lessons.
Yeah, I'd like to do that.
Well, that's what I'm saying.
We should go together.
Shall we?
Well, it sounds like you... Do you want to do it with people or do you want to do it private?
Well, I want to do it with you.
No, okay, we can do it together.
Private, I want private lessons being you in a dance studio, mirrors everywhere.
I really want to get a date with Philomena Kunk.
Oh, cool.
Do you love Philomena?
Um, no.
Do you know who that is?
No.
No, you were like, cool, cool.
I mean, you seemed passionate about it, so I was down.
Do you like British food?
What is British food?
Good question.
That's a really good question.
Sausage and mash.
Sausage and mash.
Yeah.
Potato?
Toad in the hole.
Ooh, what's that one?
I actually don't know.
I think it has something to do with sausage again.
I think a lot of British food have something to do with sausages.
Yes, it's true, actually.
I do love a sausage.
Do you?
Just a medium-sized one.
How bad are you at football?
How bad am I at football?
Yeah.
I'm good at football.
What do you mean?
What?
I'm like a six.
Six out of a hundred.
Ten.
Well, someone told me I had like 30 the other day at work.
A makeup artist.
They were doing my makeup and they said, how old are you?
I said, guess.
She goes, looked me dead in the eyes.
30.
That's crazy because you're only... 21.
21.
21.
No, honestly, it was... Have you ever been to Madagascar?
I have not.
Have you ever been trapped anywhere?
Like in real life?
Yeah.
Like kidnapped or something?
Yeah, have you ever been kidnapped?
No, have you ever been stuck somewhere and you had to escape?
I'm trying to think of a question related to Madagascar that's not as on the nose, you know?
I'm really trying to understand what the connection between trapped and Madagascar is.
Well, because they were trapped in the zoo.
Oh, you mean like the animals in a zoo are trapped?
Well, they were trapped and they escaped in the film.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah, I haven't seen it for a while.
That's like the main thing that happens in the film.
I know, but I was trying to understand the Madagascar part of it, because they come from Madagascar and they're captured.
So when was the last time you were trapped?
I thought you were going to say when was the last time I saw Madagascar.
Well, clearly, I don't think you've ever seen it.
Well, you know, you do the voices and it's like over a long period of time.
Yeah, I know how animation works.
Come on, idiot.
Okay.
Um, yeah.
What was the question?
Have you ever been trapped?
What does it feel like to be the most famous James Bond who's never played James Bond?
Next question.
Okay.
Cool.
Have you ever met Trump?
No.
No.
What would you say to him if you did?
I would put all five of these nails and I would go, really?
Really?
Really?
And I mean, I get it.
I have back home bleach blonde hair and too much bronzer on as well.
Like, I see her in that way.
It's just like, really?
I think that might work, actually.
I feel like you'll be able to relate.
How many nuggets do you think you've consumed in your lifetime?
Thousands, probably.
Really?
Well, yeah.
I mean, I've been on over 100 dates.
And you get nuggets every time.
You don't even want to switch it up little piece, a little... What would I get?
Chicken on the bone.
You don't want to do burgers, too messy.
Burgers, no.
Why would you get anything other than a nugget?
I just don't understand it.
Yeah, but there's variety.
There's options.
Look, I'm seeing ribs.
I'm seeing wings.
You could literally... There's coleslaw as well.
There's coleslaw.
You can have anything.
Apple pie.
Apple pie.
Only at some establishments.
I heard that you would like to play Louis Theroux in a biopic.
Did I say that?
Who said that?
Did I say that?
You said that.
I would be so nervous to play Louis Theroux because he's one of my idols.
If you're going to play Louis Theroux in the biopic, You can play.
Well, I'm going to be in the biopic.
Jimmy Savile.
If you're going to play Louis Theroux in the biopic, I'm going to be in the biopic because of the Jiggle Jiggle phenomenon.
The Jiggle Jiggle Phenomenon.
Go on, yeah, remind me of that.
I'm part of that.
That's me.
I didn't write it, but I'm in the... I'm part of the Jiggle Jiggle.
I'm Mrs Jiggle Jiggle.
Are you?
Yes.
Are we referring back to the way you move?
So do you remember Jiggle Jiggle?
You're going to have to...
My money don't jiggle jiggle, it folds.
Go on.
I like to see you wiggle wiggle.
Yes, yes, yeah.
Okay, it was on TikTok.
TikTok.
Okay, I can tell you're not on TikTok, right?
But I think a really bad date is whenever, like, there's no chemistry and nothing, like, lines up.
Like, what if someone's, like, trying to kiss you and you're just like, oh, I've done that.
Really?
Yeah, I tried to kiss someone and they ducked.
No, that didn't happen.
Yes, it happened.
In a car.
Were they driving?
They would, they would stop.
They stopped and they stopped the car and then I was about to get out and then I was like going to kiss them and then they yeah, they ducked.
This happened recently.
No!
Do I know them?
No, you don't know them.
What was one of the most embarrassing things you had to do at drama school?
Did you ever have to pretend to like be an inanimate object?
No, animals.
What about lettuce, like a lettuce leaf?
What would you do for a lettuce leaf?
Well, I was going to ask you, like, what would you do for a lettuce leaf?
I mean, depending on what kind of lettuce it is.
Do you, like, believe in witches?
Yeah.
I am one.
I'm a witch.
Believe it or... Cheers.
Cheers.
So nice to...
I don't want to do it now.
Why?
I don't want to do it.
I don't want to do it.
What is wrong with you?
What do you think about when you need to get into the zone when you're acting?
Death.
God.
I don't want to do it.
Because you're crying.
I'm crying.
Why are you crying?
Is this turning you on?
No.
Do you want to do this again sometime?
Yeah, I'd love to.
Yeah.
You alright?
Yeah.
I'm fine.
I've really enjoyed this.
Love does that.
Oh, okay.
Steady on.
Is there a character that you would love to play?
Your boyfriend.
Thank you.