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Hello everybody and welcome back to the psychology of your 20s.
The podcast where we talk through some of the big life changes and transitions of our
20s and what they mean for our psychology.
Hello everybody, welcome back to the show.
Welcome back to the podcast.
New listeners, old listeners, wherever you are in the world.
It is so great to have you here back for another episode of the psychology of your 20s.
We have a lot to discuss today, a lot to learn, a lot of opinions to break down and to maybe
confirm, maybe not.
I'm really excited for it because I think that the dilemma we are discussing today is a
pretty common dilemma.
I think nearly every single one of us comes across it at some point in our lives, especially
in our 20s and what we are talking about today is disliking someone that one of your friends
is dating.
Okay, so let me paint a picture for you.
Your friend has been single for a couple of years.
You know that's been really hard for her.
She really is a lover girl.
Earlier she is someone who loves being monogamous, she likes creating a bit of a nest and a
home with a partner and that just kind of hasn't really been part of her story recently.
She's just really struggled to find someone who's been on all the apps, putting yourself
out there and then one day she made someone and they've been dating for a couple of months
and you finally get to meet him and you hate him.
He is not your kind of guy.
He is dismissive, he is arrogant and your friend just cannot seem to see what is going
on.
She is like gushing, she is super in love and suddenly he is turning up everywhere as
is expected when one of your friends is in love with someone.
You know you go to the movies together, he is there.
He is at every girl's night, every group outing and the more opportunities you have to spend
time with him, the more you actually grow to dislike him.
So this is the dilemma.
Do you say anything or you kind of bound into silence by the invisible pact we all have
with our friends.
You don't have to like everything that they do but you do have to be supportive.
I think that this experience is one that all of us can relate to.
We can't be friends with everybody in the world.
We are not all going to be our cup of tea.
And unfortunately one of those people we don't get along with may be destined to end up
with someone that we do love and we love a lot as their partner.
I think this is especially common and perhaps felt more profoundly in our 20s for two reasons.
Firstly this is really a period of exploration and romantic discovery for a lot of us.
You know we are exploring what we like, our type, the kind of people we see a future
with and there might be a few duds in there.
This probably going to be a few duds actually.
That is a big part of dating in our 20s being open to different people even if they are
not always the one per se.
So just as you may have dated people, your friends despised of, trust me I have been there,
I have done that.
Your friends are also going through the same kind of romantic developmental chapter and
they are going to bring people into their life and by association your life that you are
just not going to like.
Additionally, when we are talking about this decade of emerging adulthooders, psychologists
would call it.
Our most important relationships are our friends and our partners compared to in our childhood
and teenage years when our parents and our families really played a bigger role.
As we kind of leave the orbit of the family home as we are kind of seeking independence,
our friends become our support network, they are our confidence, they are the people that
we probably spend the most time with.
So sometimes these relationships can come into conflict, right?
The relationship between your friends and your partner, especially if you are super close
friends and you are finding that this new boyfriend or girlfriend or person is really getting
in the way of a pre-established and very deep bond.
You can't help but dislike the disruption of the norm and this new person because they
have changed the nature of your friendship.
You know, or it's just jealousy, maybe it's personality differences, maybe it's because
there are really serious red flags that you know your friend cannot say.
What do you do in those circumstances?
Is it about keeping the pace versus speaking your mind?
Do you have a right to get your point across or is it just one of those instances where
you just have to stay silent and you just kind of have to handle this with grace?
Spoiler alert, it's very nuanced but I would say the majority of the time, I think it's
only right to about your tongue with a few exceptions that we're going to discuss.
That's what we're going to be talking about because I know this feeling, I have been
both friends in this situation, right?
I've been the friend who's been dating somebody that all of my friends and they hated and
disliked and I didn't want to listen and I've also been the person who's seen my friends
in relationships like that and been like, what are they thinking they need to leave?
And there is actually quite a lot of psychology to pull from to describe some of this frustration,
resentment, even sadness that we feel during these times.
So let us get into it.
I think it's best to firstly identify why you don't like your friends partner and how
I see it is that we often don't like them for one of three reasons.
Firstly, you don't like them personally because they just aren't your type of person but
they are your friends type of person.
There is some personality or preference clash going on.
Secondly, you don't like them because this new relationship has changed the nature of
your friendship, meaning that your friend is perhaps less accessible, less available,
they're canceling plans to be with their partner and this kind of leads to a resentment
that is projected onto this new person when really it's just coming from a place of adjustment
and what I like to call growing pains.
And finally, you don't like your friends partner because of how they treat your friend.
You are beginning to notice some behaviors that are major red flags, whether that be control
tactics, manipulation, anger, sometimes even abuse, weaponized incompetence.
There's a long list of things that we're going to get to and I think that that final class
of reasons is probably the only exception to the don't say anything wrong.
When you know that this is like kind of a question of safety, I do think you have a right
to speak up and we're going to talk about that in a second.
These three reasons obviously, differently in severity.
One is a matter of liking, one is a matter of insecurity and the final one is really a
matter of like we said safety.
So we're going to talk about these three reasons separately.
I think they deserve a different kind of response.
Of course, starting with I would say the first situation, which is definitely the majority
of instances in which we don't like our friends partner and it really comes down to the fact
that our preferences clash and the person that they chose is not the person that we would
have chosen for them based on our preferences.
There's just something about them that sticks out that we can't look past.
Maybe they're arrogant, they're boring, they're lazy, they're rude, they have a job that
we don't agree with and as a result, we kind of get a second hand, it.
It's really so interesting to me when this happens because how is it that we can get
along so well with someone that being our friend and not their partner because it's kind
of like two limbs or branches like sticking out of the same tree, right?
Like you would think that they would be alike but no that is obviously not always the case
and a lot of this does come down to things that we independently decide for ourselves like
our non-negotiables, like our deal breakers, like our preferences that our friends are just
not always going to share.
Let's talk about the psychology of this for a little while.
So each of us has a unique profile of what we find attractive in someone or what we would
call mating preferences and psychology.
So there is mating preferences, I know it sounds like super reductive.
These preferences they derive from a number of factors such as genetics, genetic and
printing which essentially says that we seek out partners who resemble our parents, really
strange things like pheromones and their influence on sexual attraction, attachment style,
self-perception, self-esteem, what feels familiar and safe to us.
There is a whole number of studies that looks at what it is that creates this unique profile.
That last factor is especially the target of a lot of academic consideration.
We are attracted to people who feel like they complement us or they are similar to ourselves
based on things like values, education level, socioeconomic status, how we were raised, even
race.
This may explain why we often see people date in their own league.
I know that is a really weird and reductionist phrase and a weird thing to say, but it kind
of turns out to be true, it is not always about physical attraction, it is more about
dating people who are aligned with you.
We are more attracted to people who are like us in some domain and we are seeing more
research say that if someone meets our core requirements we may tend to overlook or justify
other things about them that may not be 100% what we want.
There is of course also the theory that opposite is attract.
There is obviously some evidence for that that we choose people based on our weaknesses
based on their strengths that kind of counteract our weaknesses better to say it like that.
If we are insecure we seek out a partner who is confident.
If we like the color yellow we seek out a partner who likes the color blue and then we have
the full spectrum.
I don't fully think that that is true.
That is a much more psychoanalytic theory and has less evidence.
I think nonetheless we have kind of been signlined.
Everything kind of combines to create this profile.
What we find familiar creates a profile.
What we find attractive based on our past creates this profile.
Our education level creates this profile.
Our attachment creates this profile and this is going to be different for all of us.
None of us are going to be the same.
None of us are going to have the exact same background, the exact same upbringing, genetics,
emotional and relationship history, even like if you think about your siblings, even people
who are siblings and updating people who are so different.
So their standards are going to differ between you and your friend and it's frustrating
but you kind of just have to be there to watch that and be there to accept that what you
might look for in someone they're not looking for as well.
I think the reason this can be so uncomfortable is because you really want what's best for
them.
This is someone you adore and cherish you obviously think is incredible.
Very few people can meet the standard that you've set for your friend in your own mind.
And we want to protect them from pain, right?
It's very easy in those circumstances to think, you know, I know what is best.
I know how to protect my friend.
I know that this relationship isn't going to work.
They need to just listen to me and they would avoid so much pain.
I get it, you want to be their eyes whilst love is kind of lying them in a way and whilst
they're getting carried away in the honeymoon stage, you want to be their guide and you might
be sitting there thinking, you know, I need to do something about this as a friend.
I'm going to pause you right there.
It's important to remember that this person who they are dating, who you don't like, may
be part of their journey, which is shitty as it is.
Just because you see the potential mistake doesn't mean that you can do the work for your
friend.
They let you make your mistakes.
I'm sure of it.
And now it's your time to repay the favor.
You don't know what this person will be for them in their journey, right?
You don't know what kind of decisions they'll make for this person or to stay with this
person that actually might end up creating a life after this person that's amazing.
You don't know what this person is leading them to, what they need to experience through
this relationship or you see is someone you love and you want to kind of cushion the
fall and make their life easier.
And sometimes in those circumstances, I think you just have to bite your tongue.
This is one of those examples.
If they make your friend happy, if they're respectful and kind, that is an equally crucial
factor, maybe that's all we can ask for.
And your dislike should not be a factor.
I think in fact, it can be rather hurtful if expressed.
I had a friend once say to me that an ex partner of mine was boring and annoying.
And you know what I interpreted that as, whether this is correct or incorrect, I interpreted
this at the time as my friend saying, it's not that I don't like your partner, it's
that I don't think that your preferences are good enough.
I saw it as like a judgment of my standards and that they were so low that I was willing
to be with this person because I was settling essentially.
And so it turned from being a criticism of this guy of my ex to being a criticism of
me and it made me in my mind at least.
And it made me question the relationship but also the friendship at the same time.
Was I a bad judge of character?
Is this what this person thought?
What else did this friend think of me? Should I just break up with this guy?
Because eventually I would see what my friends saw and there would be this endless round of
I told you so's.
I think when you criticize a person's partner out of personal dislike, you are not helping
them and you are at risk of creating resentment.
Especially since we are seeing more research coming out of social psychology that our
friends opinions on our dating lives do impact our decision making.
So there was this study published a few years ago out of Indiana University and what they
found was that when people knew that their friends did not like their partner, this greatly
influenced the actual length of the relationship.
Now that could be for two reasons either our friends impacted our decision and so we called
it quits when we shouldn't have or maybe our friend recognized something before we did.
The relationship was doomed to fail.
We just were in the friend just saw it before we had the opportunity.
True.
I just think regardless, don't put up the war between yourself and this person that you
care about from a place of judgment.
An even larger consequence I think of you expressing your opinion and your friends disagreeing
is that they will no longer want to talk to you about what's going on in their relationship.
So if something seriously was to go wrong, they feel to ashamed or embarrassed or isolated
to tell you anything because they don't want to deal with the embarrassment, they don't
want to deal with you being like, I knew all along, that's like the worst feeling that
you can have.
I think what's best in this situation is to really say nothing, really kind of just have
to bite your tongue, make sure that your friend is still feels like they can rely on you
to talk about it, they can rely on you to rant about it, they can ask for your advice
and they can kind of come to you in times of need without the risk that your opinion on
their partner is going to influence them or maybe hurt your friendship.
I know it's really difficult because you obviously care but there is definitely a level
of sensitivity required.
So let's talk about this second reason, you may not like your friend's partner because
you are perhaps jealous.
I know we don't like to admit it, jealousy is an ugly word in our brains to be called
jealous, it's not something that we like to hear and jealousy is also not something that
we're likely going to fess up to.
But sometimes we just can't help that feeling, it's like any other emotion, it sometimes
feels like it's coming from a place that we don't have control over and it's not necessarily
sexual jealousy, you are not attracted to their friend, you are not attracted to their partner,
it's more a form of platonic jealousy whereby you feel like this previously solid friendship
and bond has been dismantled by this new relationship whereby suddenly your friend has
a new set of priorities and you are not as high on the list as their partner is.
I really get this, I really do, it's always so much more fun when you and your friends
are all single together or you're all experiencing the same things or there is that closeness,
you're always the top of each other's list and when that gets taken away from us because
of a new boyfriend and your girlfriend, we feel very instinctively, it's a natural
reflex I would say to feel protective over the things that we value, whether that is
a material possession or a relationship because innately we are kind of greedy creatures,
and we want people all to ourselves.
I know that's kind of an ugly thing to say, that's something that I think we feel a lot
of shame for but it's just kind of the truth, right?
Humans want more, we always want more, we always want what's best for us.
We always want more love, more possessions, more affection and sometimes I think seeing
something that we value like our friend's affection and our friend's compassion, our
friend's company get quote unquote taken away can lead us to feel very defensive.
Unfortunately, I don't think that that is something we have control over and it is not
something that we can voice, there will kind of time when we need to adjust and accept
that other relationships may be a priority for people, especially if this new partner
is someone that they're thinking about having kids with or settling down with or getting
married, that happens a lot more the further we get into our 20s and not to be like kind
of tough love about it but you can either stay in kind of Peter Panland and be like no
where I want to be single and fun and get drunk and be all together for the rest of our
lives and watch everyone else outgrow that dream and outgrow that version of reality or
you can kind of adapt and grow with them.
In those situations though I do still feel like if you're sensing resentment coming up towards
your friend that is something you need to talk about.
You don't necessarily need to say hey I'm jealous of your boyfriend because he gets more
of your attention and that's so unfair, you can be delicate about it.
I think it's worth addressing and saying hey like next time we hang out can we just have
one on one time.
You know I'm really missing you and I feel like we haven't had a chance to like fully
you know catch up ask them to hang out one on one.
Be somewhat assertive that you need quality time that is just you and them or that there
are things that you don't want to share with a stranger i.e.
your boyfriend or girlfriend. I think a good friend is receptive to that and they don't
want to see you hurt or bothered or upset so they'll listen to you.
They'll notice that there is something that is on your mind perhaps they'll address
it or they'll probably guess it and they'll make some change that.
Your relationship is being not jeopardized but is being altered and changed by their new
priorities and they have to decide whether they want to continue with that priority list
or make sure that you feel cared for.
Again this isn't about you expressing an opinion about their partner or wanting to have
some influence over their decision making when it comes to their relationship.
This is just about addressing what is within your scope which is the quality of your friendship
and what you feel you need and your relationship needs in order to be sustained.
I think although these examples are tough they do require us to have a bit of sensitivity
and think about what we would want to hear in these situations.
We all know what it feels like to just be like totally enraptured with someone totally
head over heels.
We have our blinders on we really can't see anything but them and it is like a wonderful
time.
We'll also at some stage pass and you want to make sure that your relationships, your
friendships are still there when it does so I think just catching your friends attention
and being like hey I would love to just like see you one on one.
I would love to talk to you one on one.
Can we do something that's like quality time?
That's a really important first step.
I think that if they respond to that positively great if they don't that's a further discussion
we have to be like then you can kind of pull out the kind of like never say you don't like
their partner but do say like I don't like how our relationship or our friendship has
developed since you started dating this person.
I'm so happy for you but I also think that what we have is important and will be around
has been around a lot longer than this other relationship.
Hopefully I want it to be around for the rest of our lives so let's keep working on it.
I do think though there are other instances in which we can see things that our friend
maybe can't and you do feel like you need to intervene.
You rightfully should be saying something this does happen and we're going to talk about
all of that and more after this short break.
Things like relationships in our 20s at any age really do exist and they are a disaster
to watch from the outside.
They are so painful especially when we feel powerless to do anything to help this person
to change their situation.
I think it's especially distressing when we see a friend falling into a situation we know
is not good for them and we really cannot intervene and when we do attempt to intervene it
only serves to jeopardize the connection that we have with that person and our relationship
with them.
As a friend I think we kind of take on the role of guardian angel in a lot of circumstances.
We are the ones who defend our friends when they can't.
We are there for them when they need us most.
We will be honest with them about what matters and supportive about the things that might
look small to us and whilst I have readily been recommending a silence as the best policy
for situations where you don't like your friend's partner I think that there are a series
of scenarios where you have a duty to speak up and speak up quickly.
Here are some examples of this.
I think if your friend is dating someone who is overly controlling and tries to limit
their contact with you or are there important people in their life.
If they are dating someone who is physically, emotionally, mentally, verbally, abusive
somebody who is enabling them and causing them to make decisions that you know are dangerous
someone who has lied to them about something especially something important and you know
the truth right?
So if they are cheating on your friend or lying about something in their past and you know
otherwise I think that you really have a responsibility to say something if this person
is manipulating them financially, if they are displaying signs of extreme jealousy or possessiveness
I think essentially any kind of behaviors that are coercive, abusive, manipulative or
exploitative you have a duty to intervene even if just from like a wellness check perspective
making sure they are okay that is the bare minimum.
There is certainly so much more that you can do and I want to talk you through this but
before then a quick caveat that there is so much advice to give not all of it is going
to match your situation and there are so many other online resources for this and trusted
individuals like a psychologist or a counselor or even a doctor or someone in law enforcement
that you should reach out to for more specialized individualized help.
I know that a lot of us know that but sometimes I just want to make sure that you know if it
is a really serious situation you know where to go and you know that there are people
out there to help you but whilst you are trying to help your friend there are some things
that you can do.
I think firstly create a space for open communication.
You're not going to know or learn anything, your friend is not going to address anything
unless they feel like there is a space for them to talk and talk safely about it.
So I would say be patient, invite them over to your place, keep the conversation light
to begin with, ask them about their life, ask them about how everything is going so it
doesn't feel like an interrogation, they don't constantly feel like you want information
about their relationship and you're trying to get them to leave.
Ask them questions that get them to reach the conclusion you've already reached on their
own because that will be more meaningful and effective if they recognize it themselves
rather than having you tell them and feeling judged about it and feeling like they're
getting all this information and they're not quite sure it's correct because they haven't
reached the same point and the same conclusion as you have you know if your friend hasn't
asked for help you can't really expect to go into this conversation and just speak
your mind unfiltered right because they're going to be like wait what the heck where is
this coming from like my relationship is fine, my relationship is perfect.
You know there's a difference between wanting to help and passing judgment and statements
like he treats you so badly or you just have to leave him that is not going to help them
articulate how they feel and therefore get to that same point that you have.
So when I'm talking about these questions that help them reach their own conclusion this
includes things like do you think that's normal how they're acting or how do you feel
about that how do you feel about when she does that when he acts that way is that what
you wanted in a relationship is that what you like in a relationship all of these questions
seem innocent enough but I think if the person is unhappy and experiencing a difficult
situation it will reveal a lot and it also keeps the focus on them and their feelings
not on your dislike for their partner which I think can kind of make it seem like oh well
you know they're only talking about this with me because they hate my boyfriend and they
just want them gone that's not what you're trying to do right you're trying to get them
to open up and if they are opening up if they do don't judge them like I said before statements
like how could you not see this how did it get this bad what do you think was going to happen
you need to break up with him I've known this since the beginning dump him that first
I use like a very shallow way of seeing things that doesn't take in the complexity of the
situation but it also puts you on opposing teams when you want to be in the same corner
and you want them to see you as an ally not as someone they need to justify their choices
too alongside that I also think don't try and force their hand by creating ultimatums
or forcing them to really like have to come up with a plan straight away like I think
that sense of urgency if like what are you going to do about it you have to break up
with them right now this is terrible this is a disaster I know that you're trying to
do the right thing I know that that's where you have the best intentions in mind to
help guide them out of what you see as a terrible situation but I think that sense of urgency
is going to set off so much panic and alarm that if it was me would probably result in
a complete mental and emotional shutdown they may have just realized that something was
wrong they may have just realized that what this behavior there is this behavior they're
experiencing is not right they're going to need some time to adjust because they probably
do love this person you cannot go from loving someone to hating them in an instant just
because your friend has said something right like it's a lot it's a much more complicated
journey than that it could be take months it could mean that they just need some more evidence
to understand what is going on and I think that that urgency created by forcing them to
make a decision can create a lot of cognitive dissonance they obviously value your opinion
they know how they want to be treated but they also know that they love this person and
they believe that this person loves them back so it's hard to square all of those different
and contradictory beliefs into one small space right it's hard to believe all those things
at once they're going to experience some mental discomfort while they work through that
and they want we want them to choose the true form of beliefs that your opinion is valuable
and that they know how they want to be treated we don't want them to choose the true form
of beliefs of like I'm sorry the two lighter beliefs lighter former last beliefs of like
all this person loves me and this is normal also I think it's important in these situations
to have empathy for why people may accept what you don't think they deserve it's really
crucial to be aware of what keeps people in bad relationships it's very easy for us to
you know say that that's bad and say that they shouldn't tolerate that and that's that
you know there it is the logic is sound but you're not the one experiencing the attachment
you are not the one still reflecting on the good memories you are not the one who sees
this person's potential and has imagined a future you are an outside party and we all
know the feeling of giving someone advice we know we could never take or knowing that
something is easier said than done people stay for a lot of reasons they're scared of
the unknown the situation may not be great but at least it's the devil that we know we're
fearful of what it could mean to be alone there is so much uncertainty to a life
without this other person without the comfort of a partner and although it is maybe a toxic
relationship a negative relationship at least it feels comfortable and familiar and leaving
feels really scary it may also come down to poor self-esteem they might not think that they
can do better we all have our own sense of self-worth and our self-concept and although
you may be looking at your friend being like literally you are the most beautiful magnetic
intelligent wonderful human to exist they may not share that belief or see it from your
outside perspective I think also sometimes we have blind to the problems in our relationship
because we need to be in order to survive in order to you know from a place of self-preservation
you know being able to recognize that things are wrong would mean that we would have to
leave which could jeopardize our safety which could put us in the place of a lot of
doubt and fear so it's easier to think that this is normal it's easier to accept what
is happening to us there's also shame a lack of resources or the fact that what they're
experiencing has become normalized there is this theory and psychology actually called
and learned helplessness that we've spoken about on the podcast before and essentially
psychologists came up with researchers discovered this idea when looking at experiments
with dogs and it was pretty pretty nasty but they would tie these dogs up and they would
essentially abuse them and they would they couldn't escape because they were restrained
they would then let the dogs go and they would continue to abuse them so even though the
dogs weren't chained up even though they really were free to go wherever they wanted free
to escape the pain they stayed because they had normalized the experience and they had
learned that they were helpless in changing anything sometimes these things are so ingrained
they take time to dismantle so you just have to be there for them you have to be gentle
offer support a shoulder to cry on a place to be heard and unless the help of others they
trust and love to get them to a point where they feel secure enough and safe enough and
support it enough to do something right if they do make the decision keep them focused
on the future how much better it is going to be how much you love them and believe in
them how much they have waiting for them in the next few months that is going to be so
beyond their wildest dreams paint a picture for them and affirm their choices affirm that
this is the right decision that they are making the right choice that you are proud of them
but don't lose hope if they go back a few times your job is not to force them into a decision
they are not prepared for but to love them and aid their decision even if it is not the
one that you would make these situations are hard for everyone I know that we started
off talking about just personally not liking somebody's partner which is such a common
experience but it can get more extreme than that and I know you feel a supreme sense
of duty and you want to do something and you wish that you were in charge and you wish
that you could make this change happen but it's also not about you I think in all of these
examples whether you just like your friends partner for arbitrary reasons from a place
of jealousy or from a place of genuine concern and safety that is not about you none of that
is about you is about your friend it is about what you feel they deserve what they do deserve
the relationship that they have with you and I think sometimes we can let our own ego
get in the way and make us feel like we know best and make it feel like we could just
do this all better we should they should just let us take the wheel and they don't know
anything and they're making these mistakes and what were they thinking it's not our journey
it's not our life it's not our decision so you just have to be there to support them
and pick up the pieces at the end of the day because you know your friend will only
listen and accept help when they are ready and if you alienate them by judging them by
being like your partners such a loser they're annoying they're awful you know like I said
before we know what it feels like to be in love who's side you think they're going
to choose it's not rational it is definitely not logical but it's very human to let ourselves
be guided by emotion so I hope that this episode has been of some help I'm going to leave
some resources in the description I know that this was kind of ended up being a really
vulnerable and intense conversation but I also hope that it helps because I know that
a lot of us in our twenties are witnessing this or have experienced this where someone's
just in that kind of relationship where you're like do I need to say something and it's
hard to decide whether you do or whether you need to stay silent so I hope that this
is kind of guided you in that dilemma and in that experience I've been there I've done
that I've got the t-shirt I have been both friends in this scenario and you know there
were things that I think I've said in the past to friends that I shouldn't have said that
have tarnished our friendship and there has been things that have said to me that have
made me really isolate myself and not want to talk to those people so hopefully I've
brought that experience to the table you've taken something away from it you've learned
from it and if there is someone you think needs to hear this episode please feel free
to share with them share them a link let them know that they heard let them hear this
advice for themselves maybe if you have an episode suggestion or if you just want to
get engaged with the community please follow along at that psychology podcast on Instagram
we would love to see you over there and make sure to leave a five star review on Apple
podcast Spotify wherever you are listening right now and make sure you're following along we've
got some really cool episodes coming out some that are a little bit less serious than this but
once again I'm wishing you love and luck and we will be back next week with another episode
oh our twenties the drunk dialing the forgetting to wash our face at night and yes neglecting
our teeth don't do that last one you only get one set of teeth so you need to protect them
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so by pronamel repair anywhere you buy your toothpaste or mouthwash visit pronamel.com today
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