Your 20s are not the best years of your life and this is the best news you'll hear today.
Okay, listen.
We live in a society where our 20s are glorified.
We have our 20s painted in the media as this time of wild, wild fun.
This is the time when you're told you're supposed to have all the fun, this is the best time of your life, you're supposed to travel, see the world, but then we live in a society that is deeply capitalist hustle culture, go go, go go culture.
Make sure you get everything right.
Oh my God, make sure you don't pick the wrong career.
This is the time that will determine what happens the entirety of your life.
Make sure you have all your savings in order so that when you're 30, you can live.
Oh, are you a millionaire yet?
Why haven't you bought a house yet?
Oh my God, you are super lazy.
Ah, what is your dream?
You don't wake up at 5am?
You mean you're not hustling?
What are you telling me?
That you're not looking for the jobs that will pay you the most at the age of 20?
Do you have your pension planned?
Are you telling me that you don't have any plans for your future?
Have you started saving yet?
Are you wasting your 20s away?
You're not having fun.
You are boring.
You're a failure.
Boring.
No wonder most of us are super stressed.
The reality is your 20s are supposed to suck.
Yes.
And it sucks because that is the nature of transition.
It sucks because transition is riddled with uncertainty.
This is your first life, you've never done this before.
So of course it's rocky, it's confusing, it's uncertain.
Your twenties can be your planting season, experimentation season, your discovery season, your unlearning season.
For some of us, your twenties will be your survival season, rebuilding season.
Some people will spend a chunk of their twenties recovering from their childhood.
Yes.
And this doesn't mean you're behind.
No, for where your life is at and for the experiences you had, you are right on track.
Regardless of what you find yourself doing in your 20s.
I have picked up a few mindsets that have made my 20s not just bearable but, dare I say, enjoyable.
Ooh, yeah.
Nothing is a waste.
Every experience is necessary for where I am headed.
Let me tell you something.
I do not believe that everything happens for a reason, but then if it happened to me, I have the power to assign it a purpose.
I must assign it a purpose.
So it didn't happen to you because there's this big massive thing ahead of you that it happened for.
I don't believe that because I do not believe in glorifying suffering.
However, if it has happened to you if, out of all the people on earth, it happened to you, then you have the power to assign its purpose.
This mentality has helped me through some of the hardest things in my life.
Instead of thinking, why me?
Oh my God, it is a waste.
I made a mistake.
I just decide that since it has happened, it must serve a purpose.
And I find the purpose.
And this doesn't even have to be about things that are that deep like oh, some traumatic experiences.
Sometimes it's something like a degree.
Let's say you're your mid-20s and you feel like you've wasted your time.
You went and studied something that you think is a waste of time and you're looking around now.
You're thinking oh my god, everybody's ahead of me, i've made a mistake.
Oh my god, somebody please save me.
Let me tell you something that degree is not a mistake.
No knowledge is a waste.
Every class, everything you started one time and never completed, every single skill, every single messaging that you've imbibed or taken on in your twenties is necessary for where you are headed.
Look at your life, take stock of it, and you'll find out that there are areas in your life where something that you've done in that degree can serve a purpose.
I don't have mistakes.
I don't have regrets.
I have things that serve a purpose.
Make the decision.
If in five years it becomes the wrong choice, it is not wasted.
There'll be a part of your life where that knowledge will apply.
You will look back and the dots will connect.
Every experience is necessary for where I am headed.
It is up to you to decide that the things that have happened to you have happened for you.
It changes how you attack life.
It changes how you show up.
It changes how you try to deal with issues.
It changes how you use what you have, okay?
And this takes me to number two, do what you can where you are with what you have.
When you focus on lack, you stay in the feeling of inadequacy, this powerlessness.
We live in a society where there's so much comparison, okay?
It's all about comparing.
It's all about looking at what other people are doing and doing.
One plus one equals to two.
One plus one equals to seven.
Oh my God, this person is my age mates.
They've gotten here.
I've not gotten here.
They've done this.
I've not done this.
They traveled here, not traveled here.
All these things, my love.
Let me tell you something you have to focus on what you have, not what you lack.
Be aware of what you want, so what you lack.
If there's something you lack, be aware of it.
Be aware of where you want to go.
However, the road to where you are headed begins where you are okay.
You cannot skip the steps.
There is no way for you to get to somewhere else without where you are.
A lot of times, we're so focused on every other thing.
Oh my god, i wish i had this.
If only i had a better camera.
If only i had i came from a better country, better country.
If only i had parents who had money.
If only i had this.
If only i had that my life.
You don't have it.
Okay, you don't have it.
That is the reality.
You don't have it.
What do you have?
Look around you.
What do you have?
Be resourceful.
Be resourceful.
What can I do right now where I am?
What can I start today?
Define yourself loosely.
Do not be married to identities.
Do yourself a big big favor and do not be attached to any kind of personhood.
Your 20s are a time for experimentation.
The confusion you feel about a loss of identity is the norm.
Who we are in the earliest parts of our lives, quite frankly, are just accumulation, a sum of all the people that raised us, all the places they took us, all the things they told us were true.
So don't you think this is the time for you to be as loose as you can with who you are and, by the way, i think this is necessary for a person for the entirety of their lives.
But i think sometimes in our 20s we're like, oh my god, i need to be this person.
I need to, i need to figure out who i am, what i baby relax, breathe.
The people who win, who come out on top, are people who are flexible, people who are pliable, be like water or, better still, the better quote for this is from the wheel of time.
The oak fought the wind and was broken.
The willow bent when it must and survived.
Your duty in your 20s is to survive.
Be open play play play, try your new identity.
See what fits, see what doesn't.
Okay, drop things, pick them back up.
Drop them again, pick them back up.
Drop them again.
Pick them back up.
Drop them again, pick them back up.
If you feel like you're losing a part of your identity that you grew up with, that's fine Okay.
If you decide later on to get that part of you back, you will.
Small actions compound over time.
See your goals as marathons.
See your dream as a marathon.
See your future as a marathon, not a sprint.
Intensity will never trump consistency.
Consistency will always be better than intensity.
Practice the one step rule.
Every single day of your life, take one tiny step towards something, something that you want, okay?
And this doesn't have to be something other people agree with.
Just make sure it's something that you want for yourself, whether that is your health, your mental health, your physical health.
Maybe there's a career that you would like to have in your 30s, but everything just feels too big right now.
Reduce everything to tiny bites, tiny steps.
Take one step per day.
When you look at the step you're taking in one year, it might not look like anything.
But check back in seven years.
My YouTube channel is an example.
I started YouTube in 2018.
And it took me this year to start seeing some sort of tangible evidence of my hard work.
What people do not see are all the sleepless nights.
All the times I was using my dead, fat, big-headed Windows laptop that was editing videos.
I would edit one video for five days because it could not handle my editing software.
It could not hold it.
Shooting in bad lighting.
Even now I'm not sure my lighting is good either, but my point is everything sucked.
I kept showing up and it took seven years seven years for the thing that I was doing in secret to become known and seen by the world.
Now that interest has compounded and it's tangible.
But then it wasn't tangible in year two.
It wasn't tangible in year three.
It wasn't tangible in four, five, six, seven.
You will burn out when you tell yourself that life peaks at 29.
The reason why many of us are so stressed is because we've given ourself a timeline.
If I don't make it by 30, my life is over.
You don't need to see the past to know where you are headed.
All you need to see is yourself, your feet, your hands.
And the minute you place one foot in front of the other, the ground which it touches becomes the right path.
Paths do not arrive right.
We make them so.
Okay?
So stop worrying about whether you're making the right decision.
Move forward.
Just keep moving.
It's the right path because you're on it.
If it stops being the right path, turn another path, take a different step, put your foot in front of that step and that path will also become right.
If you think that is wrong, turn again, put your foot in front of the other and the minute it touches that ground, that is the right path.
Say yes now, figure things out later.
Every single human being on earth can have one million outcomes.
Do you know every decision you make, there's other possibilities.
You could have made another decision and had this outcome.
And that is the second of every day of your life for the rest of your life.
So there's no choice you make that couldn't have had another outcome if you made another choice.
So there is no right or wrong, okay?
This is just one possibility, one outcome you've chosen.
Stop worrying.
If there is anything you seek in the world, it is your duty to become it.
So that every time you look in the mirror, you are the proof that that thing exists in the world.
Be what you desire.
Oh darling, be what you desire.
Don't expect people to be what you're not.
When you are itch, people who are itch will gravitate towards you.
Listen listen listen listen listen, listen.
The best routines, the best motivational advice, the best systems, the best self-help, the best whatever given to you, are those that acknowledge your neurotype, your history, your existence.
Do not take advice from people who do not understand nuance. difference and systemic realities.
Yes, it does not matter who you are, what has happened to you, what you've experienced.
You can do anything.
You can be anything.
There is nothing you cannot do.
But let me tell you something there are also things in life that influence every part of your life, every aspect of your life, and these things cannot under any circumstance be ignored.
So only take advice from people who understand complexity.
The reason why sometimes you can't move forward is that the The blueprint you're following has nothing to do with you.
Some people don't need to hear, wake up in the morning by 5 a.m.
Grind, grind, grind, grind.
If you don't do it, you're lazy, you're lazy.
No, no, no, no, no.
If it's against your natural rhythm, that's why it's not working.
If hustle bro cannot do it for you, avoid hustle bro-ish.
Hustle bro is not for everybody, okay?
Wake up by 3 a.m., do 71 million things by 5 a.m. will kill me.
I can never live like that.
Okay, that's not my goal in life, but some people, that's who.
That's what works for them.
The reason i'm saying this is this if you judge, you know the quote.
I don't know if it's einstein that actually said it, but they said he said it.
Whatever, there's a lot of lies about that man.
Something about if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will spend his entire life feeling stupid, something along those lines.
I can't remember.
Look for people who have done the impossible, who have done it despite the things you also hold onto, the things you carry.
You cannot be taking advice from people who cannot walk a mile in your shoes.
People who can never do it if they were you.
So find people who can, who have done it.
If you can't find somebody, darling, you have to become it.
Remember what I said, become what you wish to see in the world.
And no matter what you do, never ever adult so much that you forget how to play.
No matter what happens to you, never ever lose your childlike wonder.
Marvel at the stars.
See beauty in the wind.
Find the skies beautiful.
Call the trees by their name.
Touch the water with one eye, dance under the rain if you like the rain, not like me, i don't.
Oh call, call the skies by the name.
Never stop seeing beauty everywhere.
Yeah yeah, i'll tell you the truth.
I'll tell you the truth I've always loved getting older, okay.
As a kid, I looked forward to the future.
And honestly, my experience, it gets better.
So if your twenties are riddled with so much heartache and confusion and pain and struggle, you're planting.
Every day you wake up and do something and decide something, you are throwing seed.
You are throwing seed.
That's what you're doing, spreading seed.
Some of the seed you throw will germinate.
Some of the seed you throw will fall on hard ground, won't germinate.
Some of the seed you throw will fall on floors and soil you didn't even know were fertile, okay?
And then, I don't know, in five years, when you're 35, or in 10 years when you're 40, you look and you're like whoo.
No one told me.
I didn't know that this ground was fertile.
But I want you to get it out of your mind that your life peaks at 29.
The best years of your life are ahead of you.
The year where you have more autonomy, more money to do things.
Yeah, or this, or this, I'm not sure which one.
More freedom, more access, more comfort in your body, more confidence to take on the world, less care about what other people think.
Tell me what will happen.
You're going to be unstoppable.
Every time I get older, I think to myself wow Pearl baby, we are closer to the woman we are going to be.
That's how I feel.
Oh my God, I think to myself, girl, girl or girl, the world ain't ready for you.
So place the most powerful version of you ahead of you.
Every day you take right now, you're walking towards them.
Do not fret.
Your 20s are just a chapter in the book of your life.
Not the whole story.
Not the whole story.
It's not your whole story.
Not your whole story.
It's not your whole story, hey.
It's not your whole story, hey.
As always, and I will see you in the next video.
Y'all, I made this video sick as fuck.
I am so ill.
The internet is really an interesting place, because I'm sick as fuck, like I'm so sick.
I feel like someone is, I feel like there's a war in my brain.
I'm in so much pain.
I'm so ill.
I'm going to go to sleep.
Bye.
Peace.
