Zombie attack?
Never works.
They don't take orders.
Blood rain?
Ew, that's not my suit.
No, thank you.
Demon caterpillars?
Draft!
There must be a perfect way to exact vengeance on the Pines family.
It's not enough to harm them.
I need to take something from them.
Something that'll give me ultimate power.
Wait, of course!
It's perfect.
You've gone too far this time, Ducktective.
Welcome to a world of mystery!
Stan Pines?
The tax collector!
You found me!
Which one of these is the trapdoor?
Mr. Pines, I'm from the Winning House Coupon Savers contest, and you are our big winner!
My one and only dream, which was to possess money, has come true!
We're rich!
I'm gonna get a butler!
I'm gonna buy a talking horse!
Just sign here for the money.
You bet!
Ha!
Stanford, you fool!
You just signed over the mystery shack to little ol' me!
Little ol' me.
Uh, you might want to take another look there.
The shack is hereby signed over to...
Suck a lemon, little man!
How dare you!
I am not a threat to be taken lightly!
Come here, hon.
I need your arms.
I'll get you, Stanford Pines.
I'll get you all!
Want to see what else is on TV?
Yeah, okay.
Yeah, all right.
My favorite part's the theme song.
Little guy to black space nine.
It's a pawn.
That's not your color.
And stop stealing the tiny horses.
They like it better in here, don't you, babies?
And checkmate.
What?
Boo!
Oh!
Dipper wins again!
Yo, Mabel, can you pass me that brain in the jar?
The lady one?
I got it.
Thanks, but Mabel's taller.
What?
No, she's not.
We're the same height.
We've always been.
Better check again, dude.
Yep, she's got exactly one millimeter on you.
What?
Whoa, don't you see what's happening, Dipper?
This millimeter is just the beginning.
I'm evolving into the superior sibling.
Bigger!
Stronger!
Like some kind of alpha twin.
Alpha twin!
Alpha twin!
Come on, guys.
Nobody even uses millimeters.
It only makes you taller than me in Canada.
You know, Dipper, I've always wanted a little brother.
Who knew I already had one?
Yeah!
I was awoken by the sound of mockery.
Where is it?
Show me the object of ridicule.
I'm taller than Dipper.
By one millimeter.
Hey, hey, don't get... short with your sister.
Now, Grunkle Stan, I hope you don't think little of him.
Yeah, and, uh, he's short.
Dude, maybe you should lay off a tiny bit.
Ha!
Tiny!
Zeus is in on it now!
No, no, I didn't mean that.
Dipper will forget.
He's got a three, two, one short-term memory!
Pow!
We are on I high-five hard.
Stupid Mabel.
I'm not short.
Oh, come on.
There's got to be some way to get taller.
Let's see.
Legends of miniature buffalo and giant squirrels have led me to believe there are height-altering properties hidden deep within the forest.
Whoa.
Huh?
Is that mountain lion tiny or just far away in perspective?
Perspective!
Perspective!
Ah!
It still hurts, but less.
Smaller.
Bigger.
Too big!
I've been buying big clothes.
I'll grow into them.
Hey, guys.
Notice anything different about me?
Holy hot sauce.
You've grown an extra millimeter.
W-W-What?
What can I say, sis?
Growth spurt.
Yeah, mine happened first.
I'm gonna be taller in the end.
It's science, Dipper.
What?
But we're the same height now.
Alpha twin!
Alpha twin!
Oh, yeah?
Something tells me I've got another growth spurt coming on right now.
Give it up, Dipper.
What happened?
You know, puberty and stuff.
Doesn't make any sense.
Just a second ago, you were... Wait a minute.
This is some kind of magic-y thing, isn't it?
Was it a wizard or something?
There's a wizard in this closet.
Isn't there?
Isn't there?
What?
No.
You're telling me there is not a wizard in this closet.
You're telling me that if I open this door right now... Fine.
Open it.
An invisible wizard.
Really, Dipper?
I, you.
Howdy, Stanford.
Listen closely.
Inside this jar have 1,000 cursed Egyptian super termites.
Hand over the deed to your property or I'll smash this jar with a bat and they'll devour this shack with you inside.
Hey, what's that?
Oh, no!
Hey, Zeus, get in here!
I wanna take pictures of this!
Y'all may have won the battle, but mark my words, Stanford your family has a weak spot and I'm gonna find it.
Ah!
My hair!
Does he only respond to incantations?
Expecto wizardium!
Wizzle!
Wizard!
It's not a wizard!
I grew myself using this magic flashlight.
Let me see that thing!
I'll be back for you later.
It's okay.
It can shrink things too.
Kirsten!
Kirstipper!
Kirst... My, my.
What delightful manner of do-hickory is this?
Maybe he didn't see us use it and doesn't know.
It's a magic flashlight that can grow and shrink things.
Really?
No, no, no!
Friends, I wish I was a highway so I could have the honor of being rode upon by automobiles as fine as these ones right here.
Engine possum at no extra charge.
Say there, son, what's in the jar?
That's my little secret.
Mouth breathing fools.
Mother.
You two.
What are you gonna do with us?
Why, Mabel!
I wouldn't hurt a hair on your itty-bitty head.
If you agree to be my queen.
We live in a democracy!
And never!
Maybe you'll change your mind after this!
No!
I will fight you until the day I... Gummy koalas!
As for you, boy...
Tell me, how exactly did you come upon this magic item, hmm?
Did somebody tell you about it?
Did you read about it somewhere?
Lean closer and I'll tell you.
Well, don't mind if I... I can squash you right now!
Steal yourself, Gideon.
You can use them.
You can use them.
Zeus, this maze of mirrors is your best idea that I'm taking credit for yet.
We're gonna make a fortune.
Have my ears always been this big?
I'm coming!
One day.
Stanford Pines, listen to me very closely.
I have your niece and nephew.
Hand over the deed to the Mystery Shack right now, or Greyhound will befall him!
This is Gideon, by the way.
Oh yeah, this has got to be your worst plot yet.
They're fine.
I saw him playing in the yard minutes ago.
I have him in my possession, you don't believe me?
I will text you a photo.
Text me a photo?
Now you're not even speaking English.
What am I doing?
I don't need ransom.
I have this.
I'll shrink stand and take the shack for myself.
Y'all be helpless to stop me.
And if any of you step out of line, smash!
Gideon!
The ice cream truck is here.
Oh, coming!
Start them, Cheekums.
I'm coming!
We gotta get out of here and save Stan.
I know!
I will see you later.
Okay, how are we gonna do this?
Gideon's got magic and, like, a zillion inches on us.
On the bright side, at least we're finally the same height again.
Actually...
You're still taller?
How did this happen?
I guess it's another mystery.
Just another reason we gotta get that flashlight back.
Cheekums, to freedom!
To freedom!
Oh, you're just a big old dummy-dum.
I have a plan.
Father, could you give widow old me a ride to the mystery shack?
Oh, I'd love to, sugar pie, but I have a heck of a lot of cars to sell.
I do.
No!
No!
Don't tickle me!
No!
Never!
Never tickle me!
What have I told you?
What have I... Look at me.
What have I told you?
Tickling is no laughing matter.
There we go.
Do you still need a ride?
I'll just take the bus!
Precious memories.
Just keep backing in.
Just keep backing in.
Come on!
We need to get higher.
Yeah, especially you, because you're short.
Mabel, up there!
What cute little thing are you off to, you cute little cutie face?
I'm going to annihilate my archenemy's entire family.
Oh, okay.
Yay.
He's heading to shrink stand.
Oh, flying discount dollar.
If only you could fly us back to the mystery shack.
Maybe it can.
We're just in time.
But how are we gonna stop him?
Ah!
Shoot!
Ah!
Ah!
Ow!
Ow!
Leave that to Mabel.
I'm coming for you, Stanford.
I'm sorry, gummy friend.
It's for the greater good.
One of those infernal gummy koalas has gotten into my perfect hair.
I can't defeat Stan looking like this.
Quick, get in front and I'll regrow you.
Okay.
Wait, you're going to grow us back to equal height, right?
Dipper, that doesn't matter right now.
Well, if it doesn't matter, then why don't you just do it?
Why are you acting so weird?
Why can't you just accept that I'm a little bit taller than you?
Oh, I'm acting weird?
You're the one who keeps calling me names and stuff.
Oh, what?
You mean like little... Don't say it.
Little Dipper.
I dare say you would have defeated me if it wasn't for your sibling bickering.
The shack is mine, Stanford Pine!
Well, well, Stanford, it appears I've finally gotten the best of you.
Huh?
What?
All right, something's definitely different here.
Tell me where Stan is!
Never!
You'll never find Stan!
On the second door to the left, down the hall.
Wait, why did I say that?
Stay away!
Guess I kind of suced that one up, didn't I?
It's not your fault, Seuss.
I'm the guy who put together that shrinking device.
I guess it's just you kept teasing me, Mabel, like all day.
What was that all about?
I guess it's that you're better at me at, like, everything.
And you always rub it in my face.
Chests, checkers, ping pong.
I guess I finally felt like I was winning at something for once.
Oh, man.
Now I feel like a big jerk.
Don't you mean a little jerk?
All right, I walked into that one.
Are we cool?
We're cool.
Am I cool?
You're cool, Seuss.
Yes!
Stanford!
Oh, hi, Gideon.
I've been looking for someone to try out my new mirror maze.
Then again, you're an idiot.
That's the end of the sentence.
You come back here!
Try and find me, twerp!
Let's get that flashlight before Gideon gets Stan.
There it is!
Whoa!
His hair's so shiny!
No!
Don't look directly at it!
His neck is really squishy.
Hey, look!
I'm making fat angels!
Tell my story!
Hey, there you are.
Thought you could get away from me, Acorn Chip.
Watch the merchandise!
You little troll!
These mirrors cost me ten... I mean twenty... five... five hundred... $500 each!
And you're paying for all of them!
Au contraire!
It'll be you who pays!
Uncle Stan is doomed!
Not completely doomed!
To his armpit!
Just... come on!
What is that thing?
Finally, after all these years, after every humiliation, your business, your family, everything will finally be mine.
You have no one to protect you now!
Prepare for the wrath of Gideon Gleek!
Gideon Gleek!
I don't even know how to respond to this.
No!
Look, kid, I think this rivalry thing is getting to you.
I understand.
I mean, I'm a formidable foe.
What can I say?
No!
Hey, now, come on.
You'll get me one of these days.
Maybe, you know, run your evil plan by some friends next time, huh?
Workshop it.
But first, get your issues in order there.
Over the carpet, there we go.
Around the end table and out the door.
My light!
You're the light of my life too, pal.
Whew, freak show.
After you.
It's okay, you can go first if you want.
Hey, you let me keep my extra millimeter.
You earned it.
Aw, thanks, little brother.
Stop it.
Well, I guess we should destroy this thing.
You know, so it doesn't fall into the wrong hands and junk.
Seems like the smart thing to do.
Die!
Die!
There you dudes are.
I've been trying to get your attention.
Glue.
Lots of glue.
Son, don't you mind that Stanford Pines?
You get your revenge one of these days.
No!
It's not just about revenge!
I want that shack, the physical building.
But why?
Because it holds a secret you couldn't possibly imagine.
Sweetie, you want some ice cream?
Did you pick out all the nuts?
Mm-hmm.
That's good.
Mr. Pines, I'm from the Winning House Coupon Savers contest, and you are our big winner!
I guess we'll have to give the prize to our runner-up winner, Fiddleford H. McGucket.
Whoo!
How would you like ten million dollars?
It's my dream come true!
Cross this town off our list.