Welcome to English as a Second Language podcast number 859, Attending an Ex's Wedding.
This is English as a Second Language podcast episode 859.
I'm your host, Dr Jeff McQuillan, coming to you from the Center for Educational Development in beautiful Los Angeles, California.
Our website is eslpod.com.
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But did you also know that you can become a Learning Guide member and download that's right a Learning Guide for this episode.
This episode is a dialogue between Andy and Yuka about going to the wedding, the marriage ceremony, of someone who used to be your boyfriend or girlfriend.
Sounds pretty interesting.
Let's get started.
What did you do last weekend?
I went to Jamal's wedding.
Jamal?
Your ex-Jamal?
Yes, that Jamal.
He had the nerve to invite you to his wedding?
I actually thought it was nice of him to invite me.
Whatever happened between us years ago is water under the bridge.
There are no hard feelings on either side.
You told me that the breakup was mutual, but I always thought you still had a soft place in your heart for him.
The truth is, when we first broke up, I did harbor some hopes of the two of us getting back together, but that never came to pass.
We both moved on and I wish him well.
Well, how was the wedding?
It was very nice and Jamal's new wife seems to be a good match for him.
And you didn't mind seeing them together?
Not at all, especially after I met Lorenzo.
Lorenzo, huh?
You've been holding out on me.
Do tell.
Our dialogue begins with Andy asking Yuka, what did you do last weekend?
Yuka says, I went to Jamal's wedding.
A wedding is an official ceremony where two people promise to well.
It depends on the people, but typically they promise to be married to each other until they die.
That doesn't always happen, I understand.
Yuka says that she went to Jamal's wedding.
Andy says, Jamal, your ex, Jamal?
X-E-X means my ex-boyfriend or my ex-girlfriend.
It could also mean my ex-husband or my ex-wife.
We just use the letters EX sometimes in informal conversation when we mean ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend.
Here, it's Yuka's ex-boyfriend.
Yuka says, yes, that Jamal, meaning that's the Jamal I'm talking about.
Andy is obviously surprised.
And he says, he had the nerve to invite you to his wedding.
The expression to have the nerve N-E-R-V-E means to do something very surprising, very shocking, but also very rude, very unkind, and to do it without being sorry about it.
We might also use the adjectives bold and arrogant when trying to define this expression.
You have the nerve to tell me that my hair looks bad, when you're bald yourself, when you don't have any hair yourself.
That's what I said to somebody the other day.
Well, Andy is surprised that Jamal had the nerve to invite Yuka to his wedding.
To invite means to ask someone to participate or to come to some sort of event.
Yuka says, I actually thought it was nice of him to invite me.
So Yuka was happy that her ex invited her.
Whatever happened between us years ago is water under the bridge.
Yucca is saying that no matter what happened, even if bad things happened many years ago, that is now all water under the bridge.
B-R-I-D-G-E.
The expression...
Something is water under the bridge means something happened a long time ago, but it's no longer important.
And I've sort of forgotten about it, really.
It's not something that bothers me anymore.
Maybe you and your brother had an argument and you're mad at each other for many months or even years.
And then you decide to forgive your brother or he forgives you or you forgive each other.
And you forget about that thing that happened.
You say, oh, that's water under the bridge.
You can think about a river, of course, full of water.
And the water is always moving past.
So when you look down, it's not the same water that you would have seen five seconds ago or five minutes or five days ago.
Yucca says there are no hard feelings on either side.
To have hard feelings means to have anger or resentment about a situation or a person.
No hard feelings means that...
You're not thinking about how this other person acted or whether they may have insulted or hurt you.
No hard feelings means I'm not mad at you.
Please don't be mad at me.
Could also be a way of interpreting that expression.
Yuka says there are no hard feelings on either side, meaning neither she nor Jamal is angry at the other.
Andy says, you told me that the breakup was mutual.
A breakup is when you end a romantic relationship, usually a boyfriend girlfriend relationship.
You could also use the term, however, for a marriage.
They broke up their marriage.
They ended their marriage.
They got a divorce.
So breakup could be used in that case too.
Andy says that Yuka told him that their breakup was mutual.
Something that is mutual, M-U-T-U-A-L, is something done by two people.
You both agree.
The feeling is mutual is another expression we have.
That means I feel the same about that person as that person feels about me.
It could be a positive thing.
It could be a negative thing.
Mutual just means something done by two people or done at the same time.
Andy is saying that although Yuka told him that their breakup was mutual...
He always thought that Yuka still had a soft place in her heart for him.
To have a soft place in your heart for someone means really that you still have kind feelings towards someone, possibly even romantic feelings.
It's not always romantic.
You could have a soft place in your heart for your nephew or for your grandmother.
But it might also be romantic in some instances, when you're talking, of course, about situations where that's likely.
Andy then thought that Yuka may have still liked Jamal.
Yuka says To harbor H-A-R-B-O-R means to continue to have hopes about something or fears about something.
It could be a positive or a negative, but to keep those feelings secret from other people.
Yuka had these hopes right after Jamal and she first broke up, but that never came to pass.
She says.
For something to come to pass means for something to happen.
Never come to pass means something did not happen, did not occur.
Yucca says that she and Jamal both moved on.
To move on means to continue with your life, not to worry about some past event, that or not, to let it affect your decisions about what you're doing right now.
When two people break up in a romantic relationship, it's usually better for both of them to move on to find another boyfriend or another girlfriend or a dog.
Dogs sometimes can be much better companions, much better friends, than a boyfriend or girlfriend.
Yuka says that she and Jamal moved on and that she wishes him well.
To wish someone well means to hope that that person has a good life, to have good feelings towards that person, to want that person to be happy.
Andy says, well, how was the wedding?
Yuka said it was very nice and Jamal's new wife seems to be a good match for him.
To be a match.
M-A-T-C-H here means to have some of the same characteristics, some of the same interests that the other person has, or simply to be a good fit, to be two people that are good together.
They're good for each other.
They're a good match.
Andy says and you didn't mind seeing them together, meaning it didn't bother you to see your ex-boyfriend with his new wife.
Yuka says, not at all, especially after I met Lorenzo.
Now we find out why Yuka is not angry about going to Jamal's wedding, because she has a new boyfriend named Lorenzo.
Lorenzo.
In English, Lorenzo is Lawrence, which some of you may know is my middle name, but I am not dating Yuka.
I want everyone to know that, especially my wife.
Andy says, Lorenzo, huh?
Andy says, This is a somewhat old-fashioned phrase.
Meaning that you want the other person to give you the information, the usually exciting or interesting news that they have to tell you.
Do tell.
Please tell me is what that expression means.
Now let's listen to the dialogue, this time at a normal speed.
What did you do last weekend?
I went to Jamal's wedding.
Jamal?
Your ex Jamal?
Yes, that Jamal.
He had the nerve to invite you to his wedding?
I actually thought it was nice of him to invite me.
Whatever happened between us years ago is water under the bridge.
There are no hard feelings on either side.
You told me that the breakup was mutual, but I always thought you still had a soft place in your heart for him.
The truth is, when we first broke up, I did harbor some hopes of the two of us getting back together, but that never came to pass.
We both moved on and I wish him well.
Well how was the wedding?
It was very nice and Jamal's new wife seems to be a good match for him.
And you didn't mind seeing them together?
Not at all especially after I met Lorenzo.
Lorenzo, huh?
You've been holding out on me.
Do tell.
Our scriptwriter always wishes us well, and the feeling is mutual.
From Los Angeles, California, I'm Jeff McQuillan.
Thank you for listening.
Come back and listen to us again here on ESL Podcast.
English as a Second Language podcast is written and produced by Dr Lucy Say, hosted by Dr Jeff McQuillan.
Copyright 2012 by the Center for Educational Development.
