Welcome to English as a Second Language podcast number 707, Looking Back on One's Life.
This is English as a Second Language podcast, episode 707.
I'm your host, Dr Jeff McQuillan, coming to you from the Center for Educational Development in beautiful Los Angeles, California.
Our website is eslpod.com.
Go there to download a learning guide for this episode to help you improve your English even faster.
This episode is about looking back or thinking about one's life.
Let's get started.
I'm turning 40 this year, and what do I have to show for it?
Actually, you've accomplished a lot.
Do you know what your problem is?
Your expectations are too high, and your goals are unattainable for most people.
Not for me.
They shouldn't have been.
I had my life all planned out, and nothing is turning out the way it should.
But I was supposed to make my first million dollars by the time I was thirty.
By 35, I should have met someone and settled down, maybe had a child or two.
None of that has panned out.
You have lots of friends and a full life.
Maybe things didn't turn out the way you had imagined, but wouldn't you say you were generally content?
I was before I started thinking about my upcoming birthday.
Then stop thinking about it.
Too much brooding could definitely lead to regrets.
Not to mention premature aging.
Nick begins by saying to Danielle, I'm turning 40 this year.
To turn 40 means to reach the age of 40.
He says, what do I have to show for it?
The expression.
What do I have to show for it is not an actual question.
He is not expecting danielle to answer.
It's really a question that says that you are disappointed or unhappy with the results of your actions, that you have done a lot of work but not much has happened.
Danielle says actually you've accomplished a lot.
To accomplish A-C-C-O-M-P-L-I-S-H means to achieve something, to do something, often something that is difficult.
Danielle says, Expectations comes from the verb to expect.
To expect is what you hope for, what you think will happen.
Your expectations are what you think will happen in the future, what you believe should happen.
So if you have high expectations, you are expecting a lot of success, for example.
We talk about high expectations and low expectations.
Danielle says that Nick's expectations are too high, higher than they should be, and that his goals are unattainable for most people.
To attain, A-T-T-A-I-N, means to reach or to accomplish something.
Attainable would be something that is able to be accomplished, something you can attain.
Unattainable is something that you cannot attain.
It doesn't matter how hard you try, it's impossible, or it's too difficult.
Nick says, not for me, meaning his expectations, I guess, are not too high.
He says, they shouldn't have been.
I think he's referring to his goals as being unattainable.
He said, I had my life all planned out and nothing is turning out the way it should.
To plan something out is a phrasal verb meaning to have a clear, detailed idea about what you are going to do.
So Nick said that he had his life all planned out.
He knew exactly what he was going to do and the order in which he was going to do it.
But nothing is turning out the way it should.
To turn out is another phrasal verb meaning to become, to have a certain result or to end in a particular way.
You may say, how did the game turn out?
That is, who won the game?
What was the final result?
In Nick's case, he's talking about all of the things that he planned, but they didn't turn out the way they should, the way he wanted them.
They did not have the result that he wanted them to have.
Danielle is trying to be encouraging to Nick, who's clearly a little depressed.
Maybe he needs a vacation.
I think I need a vacation.
Anyway, Danielle says I would never have pegged you for someone with regrets about how his life has turned out.
To peg someone is to categorize someone or identify someone, to believe that someone has a certain characteristic or certain characteristics.
So you might say, I pegged you for a football player, meaning you look big.
I looked at you and I thought, hmm, that person is a football player.
That's one of his characteristics.
In this case, Danielle is saying that she did not peg Nick.
She did not think about Nick as someone with regrets.
Regrets R-E-G-R-E-T-S are feelings of sadness that something has happened, or or a wish that you could do something over again differently, something that is in the past, that has already happened.
You wish you could go back in time and change it.
That's what regrets are.
Danielle says that she didn't think Nick was someone who would have regrets about how his life has turned out.
What has happened?
What has resulted?
Nick says but I was supposed to make my first million by the time I was 30 my first million dollars.
He is saying that he thought he would make his first million dollars before he was 30 years old.
By 35, he says.
To settle down is a two-word phrasal verb meaning usually to get married, to buy a house or to live a calmer life, perhaps to have children.
We talk about young men and young women settling down, eventually getting married, no longer going out as much because they have met their husband or wife.
Nick thought he would have met someone and have settled down by the time he was 35.
He says none of that has panned out.
To pan, P-A-N, out, is similar to the verb to turn out.
It's a phrasal verb meaning to be successful.
To pan out is, however, always something that is successful.
Turnout could be successful, could be not successful.
But if you say, did it pan out, you mean, was it successful?
Was it what you were expecting to happen?
Unfortunately for Nick, his life did not pan out as he thought it would.
Danielle says you have lots of friends and a full or complete life.
Maybe things didn't turn out the way you had imagined, but wouldn't you say you were generally content?
To be content, C-O-N-T-E-N-T, means to be happy, to be calm, to be satisfied.
You're not sad.
You're not disappointed.
You are relatively happy, basically happy.
There are other meanings of that word.
Take a look at our learning guide for some additional explanations.
Nick says I was, meaning I was content, before I started thinking about my upcoming birthday.
Upcoming, one word, means scheduled to happen soon, something that is going to happen very soon.
Nick says that he was content until he started thinking about his 40th birthday, his upcoming birthday, which means he's not yet 40.
It hasn't happened yet.
Danielle says, too much brooding could definitely lead to regrets.
To brood is B-R-O-O-D means to think about something too much.
You're thinking about it so much that you become worried or sad or depressed.
So it's always a negative thing.
It's a nice word to brood, to have too much thought about something, especially something that is negative.
Danielle says, too much brooding could definitely lead to or cause regrets.
So if you brood you'll start thinking oh, I wish I had done this or I wish it were different, that sort of thing.
Danielle says, not to mention premature aging.
The phrase not to mention is used when you want to add an additional thing to your sentence, an additional item.
Let me give you a few examples.
If you go out into the sun, your skin might become red, not to mention you will be very thirsty.
Not to mention, introduces the additional idea.
Or you could say if you study hard at school, you will get a good job when you are finished, not to mention the satisfaction of knowing that you studied and succeeded, not to mention introduces the additional element of the satisfaction.
In this sentence, Danielle says too much brooding could definitely lead to regrets.
That's one thing.
Not to mention another thing, which is premature aging.
Aging is the physical changes that take place when you get older.
Premature means before the time that you would expect.
If a baby is born before the expected date, we may say that baby was premature.
Even before he was ready, he came out of his mother's womb.
The womb is where the baby is before it's born.
Well, premature aging would be getting older before you should be getting older, or you look older than you should.
I think that's happening to me personally.
I think I am aging prematurely.
People think I'm in my late 40s because of the way I look.
Wait a minute.
No, actually I am in my late 40s, so maybe I'm not premature aging, maybe I'm just getting old.
Now let's listen to the dialogue, this time at a normal speed.
I'm turning 40 this year, and what do I have to show for it?
Actually, you've accomplished a lot.
Do you know what your problem is?
Your expectations are too high and your goals are unattainable for most people.
Not for me.
They shouldn't have been.
I had my life all planned out and nothing is turning out the way it should.
I would never have pegged you for someone with regrets about how his life has turned out.
You have lots of friends and a full life.
Maybe things didn't turn out the way you had imagined, but wouldn't you say you were generally content?
I was before I started thinking about my upcoming birthday. then stop thinking about it.
Too much brooding could definitely lead to regrets, not to mention premature aging.
I'm Jeff McQuillan.
Thank you for listening.
Come back and listen to us again here on ESL Podcast.
English as a Second Language podcast is written and produced by Dr Lucy Say, hosted by Dr Jeff McQuillan.
Copyright 2011 by the Center for Educational Development.
