Welcome to English as a Second Language podcast number 491, Having a Temper Tantrum.
This is English as a Second Language podcast episode 491.
I'm your host, Dr. Jeff McQuillan.
To improve your English even faster.
This episode is called Having a Temper Tantrum.
When someone gets very angry, especially a young child, we often say they have a temper tantrum.
This is a dialogue between Alberto and Melissa, using a number of different words you might use to describe this unfortunate situation.
Let's get started.
What was that ear-splitting scream?
That little girl over there is having a temper tantrum.
Oh, great.
The movie hasn't even started and that kid is already acting up.
I hope she's okay.
She looks miserable.
Maybe her parents can distract her somehow.
She's fine.
She's just looking for attention or frustrated she didn't get what she wanted.
If parents didn't give in every time their child wanted something, kids wouldn't throw tantrums.
I don't know.
When my son was little he used to throw tantrums when he didn't know how to tell us what he needed.
He got frustrated and sometimes he would start kicking and screaming.
Well I don't think that's the case here.
Look at those parents.
They're going to buy the girl some candy to quiet her down.
That's just rewarding her for her misbehavior.
I would set limits so that things like this never happened.
In this case, I would give that girl a spanking.
Oh yeah?
Did that work with your children?
Uh, I don't have any kids.
That's what I thought.
We begin with Alberto saying...
What was that ear splitting scream?
To scream is to yell or shout very loudly.
Ear splitting means that it is a very loud sound, perhaps a sound that is very high pitched, like That would be a high-pitched scream.
That might also be a bird.
It's hard to say.
In any case, an ear splitting scream would be a scream that was very loud, very high-pitched, something that would hurt your ears.
That's the meaning of ear splitting.
To split something means to cut it in half.
Melissa says that little girl over there is having a temper tantrum.
Your temper is how you get mad or don't get mad.
Usually when we say somebody has a temper, we mean that they get mad very easily.
They get angry very easily.
A temper tantrum is a short period of time when a child loses control of his or her emotions by screaming crying, perhaps even kicking.
This would be a temper tantrum.
Alberto says, oh, great.
The movie hasn't even started and that kid is already acting up.
Alberto and Melissa are at a movie theater and Alberto is complaining that this child is already acting up.
To act up is a two-word phrasal verb meaning to do or say things that are inappropriate.
Usually It's a verb we use to describe children who are behaving badly, who are talking or doing something that they shouldn't be doing.
We use the same expression also to describe things that aren't working properly.
You might say, "'My computer is acting up,' meaning it's not working the way it should."
But here, when referring especially to children, it means that they are making noise or doing things that they shouldn't be doing.
Melissa says I hope she's okay.
She looks miserable.
Miserable means very unhappy but also very uncomfortable.
If you are walking in the sun and you are sweating and it is very uncomfortable, you might say I'm miserable.
Or if you're listening to me singing and your ears are splitting, you would say I'm miserable.
Or if you have to listen to my neighbor's children screaming, you would be miserable.
Trust me.
Melissa says maybe her parents can distract her somehow.
To distract someone means to do something to change what that person is thinking about.
If you are feeling sad, you might go and see a happy movie to distract you, to get you to stop thinking about the bad things.
Alberto says she's fine.
She's just looking for attention or frustrated she didn't get what she wanted.
To look for attention means to do something to get other people to notice you, to look at you.
Certain people, adults and children, want other people to pay attention, to look at them, to think that they are important.
And Alberto is saying that this little girl is just looking for attention doing something, so other people will pay attention to her.
Or he says perhaps she's frustrated.
To be frustrated means to be upset, to be mad, to be angry because you cannot do what you want to do.
Something is preventing you from doing what you want to do.
Alberto says, if parents didn't give in every time their child wanted something, kids wouldn't throw tantrums.
To give in here means to suddenly decide to do what someone is asking you to do.
So the child says to his mother, Mom, I want some candy.
And the mother says, No.
And the child says, Mom, I really want some candy.
And the mother says no, if you keep bothering me, you're going to have to listen to Jeff McQuillan singing.
But the child continues to say, mom, I really want some candy.
And finally, the parent, the mother in this case, gives in.
She says, okay, here's some candy.
That's to give in.
Alberto also uses the expression throw tantrums.
That's the verb we often use.
He's throwing a temper tantrum, meaning he's having a temper tantrum.
Melissa says, He got frustrated and sometimes he would start kicking and screaming.
To kick means to move your legs in such a way that you try to hit someone or something.
To scream means to yell.
The expression kicking and screaming is used to describe someone who is out of control when they don't want to do something, someone who is behaving very badly, who is acting like a child.
Herberto says well, I don't think that's the case here, meaning I don't think that is the situation here.
That's not what is happening.
Look at those parents, he says.
To quiet someone down means to do something so that the person is calmer.
The person stops screaming and yelling.
Alberto says that's just rewarding her for her misbehavior.
To reward someone means to do something nice, or give someone something as a way to thank her for doing something that was good.
But of course, this girl didn't do something that was good.
She did something that was bad.
Bad behavior is called misbehavior.
Alberto is saying that the parents are rewarding their child for doing something wrong, for misbehaving which, of course, will just cause her to misbehave again in the future.
Melissa says, what would you do instead?
Alberto says, To set limits means to make rules and tell, in this case the child, what they can and cannot do.
The word limit has several different meanings in English.
Take a look at our learning guide for some additional explanations.
Alberto says, In this case, I would give that girl a spanking.
To spank S-P-A-N-K someone is to hit someone usually a child lightly when they have done something wrong.
Usually on their bottom, on their butt, on their rear.
Parent would take their hand and hit the child in their buttocks, in their rear, lightly, we hope, not too strong.
It is a child after all.
Spanking is very controversial.
Some parents believe that you should never do that to your child.
Other parents don't agree.
Alberto says it's all about having consequences for bad behavior.
Consequence is a result, something that happens because of something else.
So Alberto is saying that if the child does something wrong, something bad has to happen to the child.
There must be consequences.
Melissa says, oh yeah?
Did that work for your children?
Alberto says, I don't have any kids.
I don't have any children.
So he's giving advice about how to take care of children even though he doesn't have any himself.
Melissa says, that's what I thought.
Meaning, I knew that.
I knew that what you were saying was not based on any experience.
Now let's listen to the dialogue, this time at a normal speed.
What was that ear-splitting scream?
That little girl over there is having a temper tantrum.
Oh great, the movie hasn't even started and that kid is already acting up.
I hope she's okay.
She looks miserable.
Maybe her parents can distract her somehow.
She's fine.
She's just looking for attention or frustrated she didn't get what she wanted.
If parents didn't give in every time their child wanted something, kids wouldn't throw tantrums.
I don't know.
When my son was little, he used to throw tantrums when he didn't know how to tell us what he needed.
He got frustrated and sometimes he would start kicking and screaming.
Well, I don't think that's the case here.
Look at those parents.
They're going to buy the girl some candy to quiet her down.
That's just rewarding her for her misbehavior.
What would you do instead?
I would set limits so that things like this never happened.
In this case, I would give that girl a spanking.
It's all about having consequences for bad behavior.
Oh yeah?
Did that work with your children?
Uh, I don't have any kids.
That's what I thought.
The script for this episode was written by someone who never makes us miserable, Dr. Lucy Say.
From Los Angeles, California, I'm Jeff McQuillan.
Thank you for listening.
Come back and listen to us next time on ESL Podcast.
English as a Second Language podcast is written and produced by Dr Lucy Say, hosted by Dr Jeff McQuillan.
Copyright 2009 by the Center for Educational Development.
