This is an All Ears English podcast episode 141.
Four phrases to politely end a conversation in English.
Welcome to the All Ears English podcast where you'll finally get real native English conversation and fluency for business and life.
We believe in connection, not perfection when it comes to learning English.
Now, here are your hosts.
Lindsay McMahon, the English adventurer, and Michelle Kaplan, the New York radio girl, coming to you from Boston and New York City, USA.
Do you ever want to get out of a conversation at a party or an event, but you aren't sure what to say?
Today, find out how to avoid being rude when you exit a conversation in English.
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How's it going, Michelle?
How are you today?
I'm good.
I'm good.
How are you, Lindsay?
Awesome.
Anything new in New York City in your life?
What's going on?
Oh, you know, just, you know, roaming the streets.
Roaming the streets?
What streets?
Where's your favorite place to walk in New York City when you're there?
Oh, I love.
Oh, man.
It's a great question.
I love.
Well, I love like the West Village for sure.
I love the Upper West Side.
I love Bryant Park.
I love a lot.
What about you?
Oh, my gosh.
When I lived in New York I used to love.
I used to love Union Square down 14th Street, Union Square or West Village or even into the East Village.
I used to wander so much in New York and just the people watching is amazing.
You know?
Yeah.
No place like it.
I do love it.
Yeah.
Have you ever had the experience where maybe you go on vacation or maybe you just have a great day in the city and you bring some photos home, maybe to your husband or to your friends, and they start to look bored?
Yeah.
Yeah well, I think it mostly happens if you're showing someone vacation photos and you are really excited, but you show one too many.
Yeah, one too many.
How do you know, right, when it's one too many?
Yeah, because some people really love to look at other people's photos and some people don't.
Yeah, what do you think of maybe like six, six is one too many fives about right?
Yeah, it depends.
It depends.
Like, for example, like, you know, my my brother loves to we make like little vacation videos.
And we joke that my brother is the only person. who actually watches them because for some reason he finds us very entertaining but we sent it to the whole family and then like yesterday we sent him something and he you know had a whole review of it and was talking about all the specific parts and he was like i'm your one viewer that's hilarious that is hilarious Oh, your brother.
It sounds like you have a really good relationship with your brother.
That's cool.
Yeah, I love my brother.
Oh, that's awesome.
I love that.
Well guys, today we're talking about the polite way to get out of a conversation like this, when someone is showing you photos or you're just kind of bored.
And the impolite way where we're going to show you what not to do first and what to do.
And let's imagine that we're at a party in this scenario.
So we're going to give you guys some real English skills to connect with natives in the right way.
So Michelle, if someone's there showing you photos or just talking to you but you're kind of bored, what would be some things that we should not say to get out of that conversation?
All right.
Well, don't say, okay, bye.
This is kind of obvious, but maybe it's not.
I mean, maybe in your language, guys, this is okay, but it's definitely not.
We need a lot more context here.
You just can't do that.
You can't just walk away and say bye or goodbye, right?
I would never do that.
No, no.
What else should you not say? you should also not just say, oh, all right, see you later.
See you later.
Yeah, see you later.
Again, also very rude.
The person's going to feel slighted, right?
What does that mean, slighted?
Well, it kind of like offended or like exactly, exactly insulted.
Yeah insulted, offended.
They're gonna feel like you are not respecting them, like like they're boring you and they might be.
You don't necessarily want to let them know that, right.
Um, what's something else that someone might do that we shouldn't do, we don't agree with?
Uh, just say, just say i have to go to the bathroom.
Or come up with some excuse like yeah, some excuse like i want to go eat something.
Or i've had people do this to me and sometimes i think, am i boring at parties because i do?
Sometimes people say to me like i'm gonna go talk to that person or they'll sort of walk away, But I think that's normal.
I think it's at a party when people are mingling.
I mean yeah, I think sometimes you can just you just feel when, like the conversation has just kind of come to a close and instead of like I don't know,
Yeah, I think it's kind of natural and it's kind of okay.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
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And so today we're going to show you guys, some things that would be better to get out of the conversation.
So Michelle, what would be one?
All right.
So one thing would be, you know what?
I really got, I really got to get going.
Got to get going.
That sounds very, the way you said that is kind of funny.
Got to get going.
Got to get going.
So practice that one.
Yeah.
A little tongue twister there.
Yeah, got to get going.
So in that case, maybe you need to leave the party, right?
But make sure if you say that you're actually leaving the party.
Don't say, don't pretend like you're leaving and then they look over and you're talking to someone.
Yeah, I think the most important policy here is honesty.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What I like this next one because it also comes with something that's positive.
Yeah.
I'd love to hear more, but I got to run.
Yeah.
And so what are we what's the impression we're leaving with this one?
It's that it's not on you.
It's on them.
And they're actually interested.
But unfortunately, the circumstances are that they cannot continue to listen.
Yeah.
So you're showing them that you've enjoyed talking to them.
You're interested.
That's a good way to end you.
Yeah, it's good to end in a positive way.
I think that's something about American culture.
We want to end in a positive way.
Right, Michelle?
Right, right, right, right.
Yeah, it just has sounds nice.
It sounds nice.
Yeah.
Lindsay, what's another one?
All right.
So the next one, you could say I have to be somewhere.
And I'm imagining this in a more impersonal event.
Maybe you're at a meetup, right in the city.
And you don't have to be specific about where you're going.
You could just say, I got to get going.
I have to be somewhere.
Sorry, but let's let's hope to see you next time.
Right.
We can add a lot of other things here.
But just saying I have to be somewhere.
You don't have to tell them where you have to be.
Just be broad about it.
That's OK exactly exactly yeah, um so, and then the last one.
This one's interesting, because this sounds kind of like what you were talking about, lindsay.
Um, it was great talking to you, but i want to talk to someone else over there.
Yeah, so I'm asking you Michelle, now is this which category?
This is our bonus at the end.
Maybe we have different opinions on here.
Which category does this belong in?
The not what you should say or the what you should say?
What would you say?
Okay, I would say that it's okay, but I want to make a small change.
Okay, caveat, little caveat.
Okay.
I would say that instead of saying I want to talk to someone else over there, I would make it like oh, it was great talking to you, but like my friend just walked in and I just wanted to say hello to her,
Like, you know, being specific and like if somebody just walked in or like...
Oh, like, I see my friend, you know, whatever.
Like, I think that's okay.
It's okay to go say, oh, I want to, oh, I'm going to keep on mingling or something like that.
But yeah, saying like, I want to talk to someone else over there.
I don't know.
It sounds a little weird.
Yeah.
No, I agree.
It's a little too broad.
So being specific and say maybe even adding a little bit of why.
Right.
Oh, I was excited to see my friend.
I see she just arrived.
So I'm going to go chat with her.
You know, just add a little bit of detail.
And that makes the person feel like.
They're not trying to get away from you, right?
You're not getting away from them.
It's more about that person that you're excited to see.
Yes, I'm glad.
I agree with you on that, Michelle.
The more broad we are here, the more it feels like you're trying to ditch the person.
Right.
Right.
It's so true.
It's so true.
Yeah.
Do you like these kinds of parties where people are kind of standing up mingling around or like?
What kind of social events do you feel like you're at your best, Michelle?
I like those if I know a lot of people like I have.
You know, like a couple of months ago, I went to a barbecue and it was like all people I knew very well.
And then it's just a blast, you know?
Yeah, that's so fun.
If it's all new people, if I have a couple of people to talk to, that's fine.
And then, you know, and then I might meet new people, too.
So I don't know.
What about you?
I think, yeah, I do.
I think you're right.
It depends on who's there.
So let's say if it's at a wedding where you know everyone, it's great.
It's so much fun.
I mean, it's so fantastic and rare, honestly, to have everyone you know in one place.
It's very rare.
But then, yeah, it just depends if it's a lighter event, maybe a work event.
It can be a little more tiring, I think.
But guys, enjoy these events and use some of these phrases.
Just don't be rude when you exit that conversation.
Right, Michelle?
Exactly.
That's what it comes down to.
Just think about if somebody spoke like that to you, would you be offended?
Yeah.
That's what it comes down to, guys.
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Right, Michelle?
All right.
Yes, guys.
We're here four days a week and we will see you next time.
Awesome.
Take care, Michelle.
Bye.
Bye.
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