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Okay, math fans, in case you're just joining us.
This season, Molly and I have been promoted within the Problem Solvers.
We've also changed schools but, most importantly, we're trying to stop a new group of bad guys called the Power Hungry Pogs, who are even more devious than the Troublemaking Trolls.
So far we've discovered.
The pogs use moles to infiltrate different groups, so they can take over from the inside.
And while we haven't been able to uncover any moles just yet, we've got a growing list of suspects.
Hopefully it's just a matter of time until we figure out who the moles are and what the pogs are up to.
On Mysteries About True Histories.
Come on, Max.
Hurry up.
We gotta go.
Mr. Z and Mr. A are having their clandestine meeting in 45 minutes.
Sorry, I had to feed Rufus.
Also, you have to say clandestine.
You can't just say super secret.
Why?
Clandestine sounds more like a cool spy movie, right?
I'm just hoping we're wrong about them.
Mr. Zimmer is a great music teacher.
I know.
And Mr. Avogadro is a great history teacher.
But you heard what they said.
They're meeting to consider an alternate history.
And you know what that means.
They're definitely up to something.
Trolls, moles, and pogs, oh my.
Hey, we better go.
They're meeting in 40 minutes.
Don't worry.
It only takes 30 minutes to get there by bike.
I gotta ask, how did you find out where Mr. Z lives?
Get this.
Brad has been mowing his lawn for years.
They're neighbors.
Hey, maybe we should get Brad to spy on them for us.
We already have Katrina as our inside operative.
We can't outsource all our covert ops.
As always, you make an excellent point.
Hey, Mom!
Molly and I are going for a quick bike ride to Brad's.
Be back by eight.
Love you.
Be safe.
And don't be late.
We won't.
Come on, let's ride.
Boom.
What did I tell you?
30 minutes on the nose.
Three miles at 10 miles per hour.
Simple math.
Okay, but we'll want to leave at least 30, maybe 40 minutes to 8, just to be safe, so we can get back to your house before your mom worries.
Fine, we'll leave at 7.20.
That still gives us an hour and 30 minutes to spy on our teachers.
Not just spy.
We need to gather information and secure some kind of evidence.
Like a secret recording or phone video.
Don't you mean a clandestine recording?
Wait, someone's coming.
I think it's Avogadro.
Quick, hide!
Hey, right on time.
I'm a history teacher.
Time is my middle name.
That's music to my ears.
Come on in.
I gotta say, this is even weirder than I thought it would be.
I was thinking the exact same thing.
Can you see or hear anything?
No, we gotta get closer.
Let's crawl over to that side window.
Gotta love the smell of fresh cut grass.
Yeah, just not in my mouth.
Shh, listen.
I can hear them.
Twelve.
We leave Carcassonne 1853 and fly on my griffin back to Carcassonne 1253.
Spell cast.
I'll bring my invisibility cloak.
Let's ride.
Whoa, the pogs are into some real magical stuff.
I'm too short to see in the window.
Can you see in?
No, but even if I could, how could I see Mr. A in an invisibility cloak?
How and where did he get an invisibility cloak?
I mean, we can all time travel.
Is invisibility that big a stretch?
I guess not.
What was that other stuff they were talking about?
Well, a griffin is a mythical giant eagle with the head of a lion.
And Carcassonne is a French walled town that has been inhabited since around 3500 BCE.
Okay, and what happens in 1853?
Well, the medieval fortress was restored to its original glory around that time.
That's some deep-cut history buff stuff.
What can I say?
Mr. A and I speak the same language.
I'll say.
And what happens in 1253?
That's when the town became French.
There were a lot of other, uh, mostly Roman or Visigoth rulers before that.
France didn't really exist, so it couldn't be French.
But you could say it was unified under French rule around 1247 and has been French ever since.
So their plan is to prevent this medieval town from becoming French?
That seems random.
It does, but there's gotta be a reason.
I know.
Let's just go back in time and figure it out.
Okay.
As long as we're back at your house by 8.
Yuck!
What am I standing in?
Yeah, gross.
But at least the music's good.
Seriously?
I'm being sarcastic.
No, I meant seriously.
We're standing in a huge vat of grapes.
These are grapes?
Um, what was that?
She's saying stomp, stomp.
Stomp?
Ooh, I get it now.
This region is known for its winemaking.
She wants us to smash up the grapes that'll be used to make wine.
Guess we're stomping grapes then.
Truthfully, I was hoping we'd be smashing the pogs.
Any bright ideas?
Yeah.
When she turns her back, run.
That's your bright idea?
She seems serious, and in this age, people tend to be pretty stabby.
Stabby?
As in stabbing us with a sword or dagger?
I don't feel like finding out.
Wait for it... and... run!
Okay, I think we're safe.
You sure?
I do not want to get stabbed.
We're not going to get stabbed, but we are stained with grape juice.
So much for my white sneakers.
Anyway, let's get back to finding some pogs and or moles.
Where should we start looking?
They could be anywhere, especially if they have an invisibility cloak.
The question is, where would moles go to undermine the French ruling party?
Um, the government building, military headquarters, the media?
What kind of press did they even have in 1253?
Certainly not a printing press.
That didn't arrive till 1440.
That's 187 years from now.
Yeah.
These days, it's mostly hand-copied letters and town criers, for current events at least.
Ah, weh.
The town criers.
Whiny little babies.
Always scared.
This means trouble.
Oh, so-and-so was stabbed.
Have you heard of the plague?
The pox?
The pain?
Oh, blah, blah, blah.
I can't listen to their doom and gloom all day.
I have daggers to make for stabbing.
Um, not for stabbing us.
Say what?
Please don't.
Ugh, who are you?
You don't look like you're from around here.
We're not.
Say, Mr. Blacksmith, you haven't by any chance seen any moles recently, have you?
Rats?
No mole.
Only rats.
Actually, I don't mean the animal.
I meant people who burrow their way into places and groups where they don't belong and hide among them.
Huh?
Merci beaucoup, monsieur.
Max, I think we've bothered this hard-working weapons enthusiast enough.
Let's slowly back away.
Agreed.
Bye.
Okay, the main part of the city inside the fortification, aka the stone wall, is actually pretty small.
I feel like we could cover this area quickly if we split up.
Maybe.
The double-walled fortification surrounding the city is three kilometers, which is how many miles again?
I can't believe how often we have to do this calculation.
If we could just go metric like the rest of the world, we'd all get along a lot better.
Focus, Molly.
Sorry.
So one mile equals 1.6 kilometers.
So 3 divided by 1.6 equals, move the decimal over to the right one, making it 30 divided by 16.
16 goes into 30 one time.
Keep on going.
Multiply subtract divide and 3 kilometers equals 1875 miles roughly.
Great.
And there are 52 towers, some with armed guards, depending on the moment in history.
How about now?
How would I know?
But remember, Molly, the guards aren't looking for us.
They're looking for militant hordes of enemy forces with archers and horses and spear-wielding mercenaries.
Something tells me you and I will fly under their radar.
Good point.
Okay, but let's just do some math just in case.
There are 52 towers... on 1.9-ish miles of wall.
19 divided by 52 means one tower every 037 miles or so, or every 195-ish feet, since there are 5280 feet in a mile.
Okay, our math is sound, but what are we actually achieving here?
I don't know, Max.
I don't know what the plan is.
Well, neither do I. But someone, somewhere around here, is up to something.
Piatine!
Piatine!
Yikes!
The grape lady found us!
Run!
Okay, let's say the wall of the city is a perfect circle.
It's not.
We don't have time to break it down into triangles and quadrilaterals to figure out the area, so let's just pretend it's a circle.
Fine.
The circumference is 19 miles.
2 pi r is circumference, so 19 divided by 2 times 314 gives us a radius of about 03 miles.
Okay, and...
The area of a circle is pi times radius squared.
In this case, 3.14 for pi times 0.3 squared, which is 0.09.
That gives us 0.28 miles, or just over a quarter of a mile.
That's just one lap around the soccer field at school.
Sure, with 52 guard towers to search for evidence of an undefined crime and two suspects who could be anywhere really.
So what are you saying?
I'm saying I'm starting to lose my motivation.
Hey, problem solvers never give up, Mal.
I know.
Let's go to the castle ramparts.
We can look down on the city.
Huh?
What's a rampart?
A bulwark.
What's a bulwark?
It's actually a bit of a loose definition.
But basically, a raised fortification of sorts for defensive acts and from above.
In Carcassonne.
The castle has towers of exterior enclosed archery perches to guard against oncoming attacks.
Okay.
Even if we do have the high ground, we might not be able to see Mr A or Mr Z.
What if they are invisible?
Here's what I think.
We go back to Mr. Z's house, see what we can see, and call it a day.
This has gotten out of hand.
Not to mention, we don't even have problem solver permission for this.
You're probably right.
I was just really excited to catch them.
What if we just tried one last... Yikes, it's the wrath of grapes.
Let's get out of here.
Hit it, Max.
Phew!
We made it.
And stab-free.
Just like I said.
Campaign unsuccessful.
I guess our history remains unchanged.
Did you hear that, Molly?
They failed at their mission.
Hold on a second.
Hoist me up so I can see.
All right.
Here goes.
Be careful they don't see you.
Can you see anything?
Aha!
It's just as I suspected.
They're invisible?
Nope.
Far from it.
Mr. A is wearing a pointy red felt hat and a long white fake beard.
I require additional crystals to charge my invisibility cloak.
Otherwise, I'll be spotted for sure.
Well, Barnaby, we were unsuccessful in our campaign to change our timeline.
And now the advancing barbarian hordes are pounding at our main gate.
Boom!
Boom!
Boom!
Does someone on Zoom want to roll to find out if we hide, flee, or fight back?
Chrysanthemum the Elf Queen.
Chrysanthemum the Elf Queen?
What in the world are these pogs doing?
Perhaps Pelican Sky Dancer would like to take a turn.
Yep.
And Mr. Z is wearing a star-covered hooded cloak and holding a tall, gnarled wooden staff.
Come to think of it, I've seen that staff in the band room before.
I thought it was his hiking stick.
So, what are you saying?
I'm saying Mr. Z and Mr. A aren't moles.
And they've probably never even heard of the Pogs.
They're just role-playing gamers.
Wait, I can't hold you up anymore.
It's okay.
I'm okay.
Yeah, that's because I broke your fall.
Anyway, back to what you were saying.
Are you saying our favorite teachers are just RPG nerds?
Hey, we're all nerds for something.
Mr A just happens to be a gnome named Barnaby with an invisibility cloak.
He needs to power with crystals.
And Mr. Z is a wizard named... I, Gally Lay Odin the Great, cast a flaming moat spell!
Spell successful!
Chrysanthem rolled a six.
Our city is saved.
Now, let us flee atop my pet griffin.
Fly, Esther, fly.
He named his griffin Esther?
Hey, they're just having a good time.
Now I feel bad accusing them.
Sure, but all their timeline talk did sound very suspicious.
True, but we shouldn't be so quick to jump to conclusions.
True, but like any good detective or problem solver, it behooves us to follow up on every lead.
Did you just say behoove?
I meant, it's required of us.
No, behoove is a great word, nerd.
Takes one to know one.
Yikes!
It's 20 to 8!
We gotta jet!
This episode of Mysteries About True Histories was written by Libby Ward and voiced by Dexter Danger, Mayo Molly Smith, Chris Okawa, Mike Previti, Kim Davis and Adam Tex Davis.
Original music by Brian Suarez.
Our associate producer is Max Kamaski.
Technical direction and sound design by Josh Hahn.
Mysteries About True Histories was created and produced by Adam Tex Davis and Jerry Kolber, and is an Atomic Audio production.
