You're tuned in to Roundtable.
My name is Steve and today I'm with Yuxin and Yuxan.
Coming up, don't you just love it when the internet tells you how to be a better person?
Well, it's happened again.
There's a new viral trend on that internet that promises to reset your life in just 50 days.
That's less than two months.
You could do it before the end of the year.
And all you have to do is follow seven simple rules.
Stick around to see if you think you can follow them.
After that...
Wow, your new haircut looks so amazing.
Or that sweater really brings out the color in your eyes.
Or of course, I wish I could go to your party.
Little white lies are harmless, yes?
Think again.
They could be doing more harm than you realize.
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And now...
Every so often a ritual rises from the noise of the internet, whispers of renewal.
This one speaks of fifty days, a measured span of time said to realign life itself.
The promise though, is not in the details, but in the idea of shedding old habits and stepping into something brighter, cleaner and more complete.
It carries the allure of ancient practice dressed in modern language.
A pilgrimage, if you will, for the restless spirit.
Yet even as the days are counted, one cannot help but wonder whether the true transformation lies in the ritual itself or in the belief that such a transformation is possible at all. change is hard but we have seven rules to make us better can we do it or can we not we will find out so what exactly is this life reset challenge well it actually started as a social media trend on tiktok and instagram and people started calling it the great lock-in of 2025 and now it's not just in the u.s anymore it's been picking up momentum in china too and a lot of folks are just treating it as a a fresh wave of inspire inspiration and now if you're not totally fluent in gen z slang lock in might sound a little mysterious but basically it means entering a zone of absolute focus yeah right to mean focus one thousand percent on your goal yeah and do that until you're until you're finished All right, so let's not bury the lead any longer.
What are these magical steps that will change our lives?
Well, some of the, yeah, there are seven simple rules here.
Wake up before 8 am, do one hour of exercise.
Spend one hour on a distraction-free morning activity.
Read 10 pages of a book.
Well, I'd love that.
Learn a new skill for one hour. eat healthily, and track your progress every day.
So you have to do all of these seven things for 50 days straight in total.
Yeah, from September the 1st through December 31st.
If you started on September 1st.
For example, yeah.
There's a catch though.
What's the catch?
If, let's say, you miss even one of these steps on one of those days during the 50-day challenge, you've got to restart from day one.
So if you yes, i did my one hour of exercise.
Yes, i did my one hour of distraction, free morning activity.
I also read 10 pages.
I learned a new skill for an hour.
I ate a healthy meal today actually three healthy meals today and i wrote down all my progress.
But i woke up at 9 am instead of 8 am.
This means tomorrow you start from day one once again, If you're religiously following this.
Yes, that's the case.
And also, this is a 50-day challenge.
If you did everything I just said, including waking up one hour late on day 47 by this standard, you go back to day one.
That's true.
Okay, but if you do successfully complete the different days or all of those different days, the 50 days, and you complete all of those seven rules, then you're supposed to be.
A leveled up person from where you are before.
You know what this sounds like to me?
Back then, when I was in college, if not earlier, back in high school, there used to be a lot of similar activities, but not as harsh and brutal, I'll say.
There used to be like finish a book in 60 days, that kind of thing.
You tap into a link and finish the part you are kind of required to read.
And then the system normally attached to WeChat or whatever social media you're using will just count that day as one tick.
And then 60 days later, you're probably going to get a little prize or a practical, like physical, copy of that book you're reading.
The app takes care of the progress for you.
Yeah, it takes care of the progress and grants you little awards afterwards.
So that was quite popular back then around 2015-ish, I'll say.
And nowadays we see the upgraded version.
Yeah, this is a little bit more difficult, I think.
This is challenging on self-discipline.
This, of course, it sounds quite difficult when you have a certain like time that you need to wake up, but when let's think about another topic that we had discussed before the 75 hard challenge right, we people have to do a certain amount of workout exercises, getting enough protein, something like that and also they have that requirement if you miss one day, you restart from day one, that kind of thing.
What's different about this one then, though?
Because that 75 hard, and I think there was another one called Winter Arc, right.
Those were also things that were where you had to follow a strict routine for a set period of time and the goal was the same to improve yourself or improve your life.
So what's difference?
What's the difference here?
Then, back then, all of the uh, both of these challenges like 75 hard and wind arc.
They are more likely make you have a exercise or fitness or health goals, but in this one we're talking about, participants are encouraged to choose the goals that truly matter to them, because In some requirements we can see a distraction-free morning activity.
They are not limiting any specific activities.
It can be something that you're interested in.
It can be something that you are chasing in this time.
That should be something that truly matter to you, whether that's learning a new skill or just getting a social media account and getting popular, or finishing a personal project or something like that.
So this kind of personal freedom makes it easier to make you motivated, because it's about your life and your priorities, not a one size fits all routine.
Yeah, so there is more flexibility in this one.
I guess this is the time of year, too, isn't it?
Because when people start January 1st, everybody says have a one year to work hard on, i'm going to be in the gym three hours a day, i'm only going to eat lettuce and apples, that's it.
I'm going to read a book an hour.
All of these grand goals.
But when we get and we and we think we don't think negatively until we start to get to the summer time, right.
But then the summer time comes, we're kind of distracted because It's hot and sunny and we want to travel and go to the beach and stuff.
So we kind of forget to track our progress from the beginning of the year.
But then when summer finishes, we get into fall.
Then people's brains go oh yeah wait, what was I?
– how am I doing?
Oh, not so well.
It's been half of the year.
Yeah, it's been more than half of the year.
And also September's got that magic – vibe for not only students but also adults too, because usually on september the first, at least here in china, is when students go back to school, and it almost inspires people, adults included, that it's a new semester for your chapter of life as well.
Yeah, so it's not too late.
Exactly, you took the words out of my mouth so, for your brain, even if you feel like you haven't really done a great job with your resolutions up until maybe september, you still feel like you have time.
And the truth is you do still have time.
And this one too, I think is easier, for I'm not sure maybe 75 hard and winter arc, that those would have been focused perhaps more on on younger people right.
Extreme fitness goals.
But this one seems pretty reasonable for people of all ages.
Yeah.
It started with young social media users, but this one, these principles, they resonate with people of all ages and in business.
Leaders and execute.
Executives leaderships, end-of-the-year chaos with reviews, strategy meeting and planning for the next year these can all create anxiety, and the lock-in approach gives You just a way to prioritize things, focus on what really matters for you at this point of the year and translate uncertainty into concrete, achievable action in those 50 days.
And the number of days is kind of curious.
Yeah.
Why 50?
Because?
Well, this is according to China Science Communication, which is a major science communication website, saying that 50 days is the golden period for habit building.
Back then, that was like 21 days for you to form a habit.
21?
21 days.
You have to do that consecutively.
Did you see the disapproving facial expression from Steve?
Well, now they've extended it to 50.
Yeah.
Yeah, because they know 21 isn't really reasonable.
Long enough to break the old routine, let's say, and short enough to avoid burnout.
Yeah, right.
So does it work?
Some find it helpful.
Many netizens, let's say they joined the various groups and found accountability with their newly met partners.
I was confirming with one of our colleagues earlier today who's had this kind of experience and he said not all of these partners Quote-unquote partners are someone you know.
It can be absolute strangers with the same goal as you are.
And, of course, shared purpose and progress, too.
So the great lock-in projects.
It helps people define what truly matters to them, of course, and give permission to pursue it sustainably, together with your pals and participants like you.
Katie Glenn sees it as a way to focus on meaningful goals, whether running a marathon, growing a social media following or learning a new skill something simple as that, in a structured, time-bound way.
So these are some of the comments from online reports.
But i would say, how do you, or how do people, define whether it works or not?
Because when you're doing these kind of routines, if you like, strictly stick to every one of them, to the plan.
Of course, it works right.
You, you've done a lot of these things for 50 days and the fact that you actually finish this plan is something that so that it has a sense of accomplishment, right.
So when we are thinking about whether it works, I would say, rather than thinking about should it work or whether it works, we should first of all think about when to start.
Yeah, and also, do you really want it to work?
Yeah, how much do you need?
Yeah, how much do you want this?
Because if you truly want it, of course, it's achievable.
Um, so what are they again, just before we finish up this chat.
Okay, so here we go, as we head into the holiday.
Here are the seven rules you need to follow if you're going to start today.
Wake up at eight or before eight am.
One hour of exercise.
Everyone also.
Give yourself an hour.
Don't be distracted during your morning activity of your choice.
Read 10 pages of a book.
Learn a new skill for one hour every single day.
Don't eat too many dumplings during the holiday.
That's not allowed.
And you have to make a little progress report for yourself.
I say go ahead and do this.
But I also say wait until the holiday is finished.
Give yourself a little break.
Yes.
You're listening to Roundtable.
My name's Steve.
I'm with Yushin and Yushan.
And coming up next, little white lies are completely harmless until they aren't.
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Then tune in to Roundtable, where East meets West and understanding is the goal.
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I'm Steve with Yushun and Yushan.
And we all traffic in those minor deceptions, the small social currencies paid to smooth an edge or spare a feeling.
They feel harmless and they feel almost necessary at times.
In fact, a slightly polished version of the truth could be considered an act of kindness, no?
Well, the answer is no.
Each one, however innocuous, is a subtle fracture in the foundation of the real.
We rarely stop to consider the cumulative weight of these fictions, the way that they can slowly and quietly distance us from ourselves and from others, creating a world built on the fragile architecture of what is convenient rather than what is true.
And genuine connection might have otherwise grown.
But with all that said, is that such a bad thing?
We're going to chat about it.
All right.
So I've got a list of 10 common white lies that people say on a daily basis.
And you tell me whether you have lied about this or not.
Number one.
Oh, yeah.
I'm almost there.
That's a lie?
My version of that is... I got a lot of that.
Oh, it took me... You've heard it a lot.
Oh, my...
My version of that is it took me 10 minutes to get a car haul.
Okay.
Number two.
Oh, sorry.
It must have gone to my spam folder.
Yep.
Totally used it before.
You've lied about that one.
You shouldn't.
No, not yet.
Number three.
Oh, sorry.
My phone died.
Rarely.
Number four.
I don't really watch TV.
There's not even a white lie with me.
That's true.
People tend to lie, apparently, about how much TV they watch.
Number five.
Yeah, I'm good.
Of course, I'm doing well.
I did that.
Number six.
Sorry, traffic was crazy.
Yeah.
Yeah, I've lied about that one.
Number seven.
You look great.
Number eight.
Your baby's super cute.
Oh.
Number nine, sorry, I thought I replied to your message.
Yeah, everybody uses that one all the time.
Or, oh, I thought I replied to you, but apparently in my mind.
Yeah, sorry, I thought I did that already.
Or number 10, oh, you want me to go to your thing?
Yeah, I'll let you know.
I might be busy that day.
I'm not sure.
That's exactly what I said last time.
I may have a business trip that day.
These are common white lies.
So why are we so drawn to telling white lies in the first place?
Because we want to be seen as a good person, and telling a white lie can make us feel like we're being compassionate and kind.
And it can also make us seem more agreeable to others and not giving that too harsh or impolite answers that we think.
So in a way, we're lying to manage how people perceive our own characters.
The way I see it is that when a white lie is needed, it means that there's a mismatch in the conversation.
And these what we call the little white lies are there to fill in those gaps, so that the mismatch can somehow be smoothed out.
Whether it's a very intimate relationship you're building with this person or it's just simple, like superficial kind of dialogue, day-to-day dialogue.
To keep the relationship wheels churning.
Yeah, and less awkward in the daily conversation.
They say, too, it's kind of a form of self-preservation.
Like you said, Yishan, we want to be seen as a good person.
We don't want to hurt other people on purpose.
So there's two sides to that coin.
And that's why we think that white lies are totally harmless.
But why do they say that they can be more damaging than we realize?
They are white only when the other side didn't find out their lies, I think.
So it can erode the foundation of trust.
Even small lies can chip away at the trust that you have in this relationship.
And when the other person finds out, wow, you were lying to me, then that trust can be corrupted.
But that's the point.
They're never supposed to find out.
Which is why it's success.
Listen to me.
What am I going to say?
If you have a new baby and you say, oh, look at my baby.
Look, it's so adorable, right?
And I say, actually, I've seen better looking babies.
Well, that's not going to help our relationship, is it?
I have to do the expected, aww, I have to do that.
But what if you were being mean with another friend and he overheard it?
Well, then you don't do that.
You don't make that kind of mistake.
Especially on the appearance of a baby.
I also think there's a difference in different types of white lies.
Whether you initiate the lie or whether it's forced upon you.
Yeah, this is what I mean by that.
If you walk up to your co-worker and say wow, you know your hairstyle or your new contact lenses or your new glasses are really gorgeous, and nobody asked you, but you totally don't think so, well then that's a different story than if your co-worker comes to you and says oh, do you like my new glasses?
Do you like my new lipstick shade?
Do you like my new shirt?
And Then they're forcing you to reply.
You see the difference between the two?
Number one, nobody asked you in the first place.
And you were lying?
Why would you do that?
I'm saying there's a difference in the white lie.
That's the thing with white lies and how it's so easily mistook as chitchats, part of the chitchats.
Because chit-chats.
A lot of the time it happens because we've got nothing better to say to each other.
That's brutally honest here, right?
It's just a greeting that has to happen.
But when, yeah, literally it's not work, it's not about our lives, then that's chit-chat.
And chit-chat happens with the start of sometimes a little white lie.
Like, oh, you look good today.
How does it affect the person that tells the white lie, though?
Because we know that the intention is to protect the person that we are lying to, but it's also to protect ourselves.
But what's the potential damage here?
After a long term maybe you can get used to it and you may not even realize that you are lying in some cases.
Then it can erode your sense of self, because lying even about like seemingly insignificant things can make it harder for you to connect with your own thoughts and feelings.
And it can lead you to feel like you're losing touch with your authentic self.
And sometimes even increase your cognitive load, because you have to build up a whole concrete evidence for your lies and maybe lie after another lie.
What's that expression?
It's a wicked web we weave when we start to tell lies.
One lie begets another lie begets another lie and maybe they get bigger and bigger.
And after 50 days, let's say, if you continuously do it... The 50-day white lie challenge.
You have to tell a white lie every day.
That's a fun internet challenge.
Let's not do that deliberately.
But there are scientists saying that if you keep on doing it, say, chronically...
You almost feel like you have to keep lying to get what you want all the time.
Yeah.
It becomes such a habit that's not really encouraged, especially in, say, modern day society.
I guess so.
I mean, psychologists always say that, though, right?
You know, like, oh, no, don't do that because you're going to hurt yourself long term.
Yeah, but what about in the short term?
You want to keep your relationships with your coworkers nice and smooth.
And give instant feedbacks.
Yeah.
So then, okay, so fine.
Let's try to be better people.
How can we do this?
How can we be more honest while making sure our relationships are safe?
How about focusing on compassion, not just instant comfort?
Instead of lying to make other people comfortable, at that very moment you can choose to be say, compassionate and honest for their long-term growth.
So there are also scientists suggesting that we think about compassion differently, by telling someone what they need to hear, not just what they want to hear.
So by phrasing things in a slightly more straightforward way, but actually for their own good, can sometimes help.
For example?
For example, use I statement to frame your feedback to just avoid sounding like you're accusing someone.
You can frame your feedback from your own perspective.
Like that jacket.
I feel like it's a different color could complement your style better regarding your new jacket instead of oh, that's an ugly jacket.
That's the worst advice.
So instead of saying you like the jacket, you're supposed to say what you're supposed to say.
Other colors fit you better, I think.
I don't know if that's a good idea or not, particularly where everybody's going to be, you know, meeting their friends and their family over the holiday.
I don't know.
I say stick with the white lies.
They do serve us well.
That'll do it for a roundtable for today.
Thank you very much for being with us and sharing your time.
Thanks to Yushan and Yushan.
My name is Steve.
We hope you have a great day and do come back again next time.
